#i don't have a pt 3 in mind so;;; i think that's it

[askthehedgehogs]

[Hello and welcome to askthehedgehogs Wedding 2.0! If you're not familiar with the ask blog, check it out for context, or just enjoy a contextless fic + art in which Sonic and Shadow get married (again). Pt 3/6! START | PREV | NEXT]

Wedding: 2.0 Chao Gardens 3rd Mission: Make it through all three dinner speeches!

Sonic was in his own personal hell.

Sure, he was still buzzing from having just married the love of his life for a second time. But now he was sitting at a table, with a platter stacked high with the most delicious looking chilli dogs he had ever seen, right across from him… and he wasn’t allowed to touch a single one.

Not until Tails, Amy, and Rouge had each delivered their speeches.

He sipped resentfully at his glass of champagne, hoping to keep the hunger at bay–or at least stop himself from drooling at the delectable aroma of spicy chilli… he glanced at the table where Cream sat with Vanilla and the Chaotix. Darkness had her own place at the table, and it was with no small amount of bitterness that Sonic realised she wasn’t being forced to wait for the speeches to finish before digging into her fancy fish dinner.

Amy was first up, tapping a spoon delicately against her champagne glass.

“Well, I’m sure everybody’s still excited after that… unconventional ceremony! As Sonic’s best girl and trusted wedding planner–” the pink hedgehog paused as guests raised their glasses to toast to her hard work, “I just wanted to say a few words for the happy couple!”

She smiled to Sonic and Shadow. “I’ve actually been planning Sonic’s wedding for… gosh, well over a decade! Granted, my original plans had me as the beautiful bride…”

A few of their closer friends laughed, recalling Amy’s past obsession with the blue hedgehog. Sonic himself just rolled his eyes with a fond smile.

“Seriously, I’ve got binders full of old plans for our big day! But… seeing the two of you together, I’m so happy I got to plan this wedding for you, Shadow.”

Shadow blushed, ducking his head.

“You’re a dear friend, and it’s clear as day how happy you make Sonic. He adores you, and you obviously adore him, too!” She let out a contented sigh. “Anyway, I don’t wanna get too emotional, so I’ll just say this… I’m so lucky to get to see two of my closest friends so happy together. Thank you for trusting me with your special day!”

“Aw, Ames…” Sonic felt a little bad for hoping she’d be brief. “There’s no one I trust more to throw the party of a lifetime! Thanks for being our number one supporter.”

Shadow smiled at Amy as she sat back down. “Thank you, Rose. I’m sorry to have caused you stress.”

“Eh. I’ve dealt with Sonic long enough; I’m used to stress. You have to live with that for the rest of your life~!”

“Hm. I’m looking forward to it.”

Tails hovered above his chair, clearing his throat. “I’m up next!”

Sonic grinned at his little brother, filling the fox with confidence as always. “Go for it, bro!” He gave a thumbs up.

“Right!” Tails cleared his throat, unfolding a piece of paper in his hands. “People here know Sonic as a lot of different things. Most of you probably know him as a hero, or a celebrity. Some of you are lucky enough to know him as a friend. But me? I’m the luckiest of all, because I know him as my big brother.”

The blue hedgehog’s smile softened. He leant his shoulder against Shadow’s.

“When he started dating Shadow, I thought he was out of his mind! I wasn’t exactly Shadow’s biggest fan–no offense–and I was worried he might hurt Sonic, maybe even break his heart.”

Shadow huffed, his arm coming to rest around Sonic’s shoulders as the latter laughed quietly.

Tails turned to the dark hedgehog. “But, now I know I don't have to worry. I can tell you’re good for him. Ever since I can remember, Sonic’s always put everybody else first. But you manage the impossible; you get him to think about himself sometimes!

“I’ve always looked up to my brother, but now I look up to you, too, Shadow. Even if we don’t always get along, you’re cool in your own way and have a lot of great qualities. You’re part of the family now, so you can count on me if you ever need help!”

Tails smiled, lowering himself back down onto his chair. “Just take care of my brother, okay?”

“Of course,” Shadow nodded with a proud smile, “Always.”

A hand came to rest on Shadow’s shoulder as Rouge stood behind the empty seat to his right. “Looks like I’m up, handsome~”

Shadow snorted a laugh. “No embarrassing stories, bat.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll keep things child-friendly~” she winked. “Actually… well, I wanted to take my role as your best man a little more seriously than that. Hope you don’t mind.”

The hedgehogs tilted their heads curiously. They had both expected Rouge’s speech to be nothing but suggestive jokes and embarrassing stories from her time living with the Ultimate Lifeform.

“I’m not just here as your best man, Shadow. I’m here as your family.” She placed her hands delicately on the empty chair in front of her. A name card had been set out, but no plate or cutlery, just a handful of paper stars and flower petals in their place. “I know I don’t fill that hole she left–not even Blue could do that–but I want you to know that you’ll always have family by your side.”

Sonic took Shadow’s hand and squeezed it tightly, watching as his husband’s expression softened.

“I may not have known the Shadow she knew and loved. But if he was anything like the hedgehog you’ve become, then Maria was lucky to have known you. I’ve been beside you, watching you grow and change and learn to live since the day I found you. Not only have you found room in your heart to love in spite of it all, but you’ve also found the courage to forgive yourself and let go of your past. Maria would be so proud of you, Shadow. I’m so proud of you.” 

Rouge wrapped Shadow in a warm hug, pressing a kiss to his forehead that would undoubtedly leave a lipstick stain to match the red in his quills. But Shadow couldn’t bring himself to care, emotions threatening to spill out as he hugged her gingerly.

When Rouge pulled away, she moved to stand behind Sonic, patting him on the head so that he would look up at her. “Be good to him, Blue. I already know you will, but just know that I will ruin your life in ways you couldn’t even imagine if you hurt my boy~”

Sonic laughed with a roll of his. “You don’t have to worry about that, Rouge.”

“Good~” Rouge fluttered back to her seat next to the empty chair.

Amy raised her glass high in a toast. “To the happy hedgehogs!”

“To the happy hedgehogs!” Guests responded, lifting their glasses as well before taking a sip.

While Amy gave the go ahead for the meal to commence, Sonic pressed close to Shadow, holding Shadow’s hand to his chest to keep him grounded. “Hey. You okay?”

Shadow nodded. “Yes. Just… thinking about her. Curse Rouge for making me get emotional again…”

Sonic chuckled, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “Looks like that eyeliner’s waterproof. Good thing, huh?”

“Hm.”

“Hey…” he interlaced his fingers with Shadow’s. “Rouge was right. She’d be so happy for you right now.”

Shadow smiled, enjoying the steady thrum of Sonic’s heartbeat. “I know.” He let out a shaky sigh, allowing his feelings to seep into his bones. He regarded his husband. “... She’d love you, you know.”

“Heh… you think so?”

“I know so.” Shadow moved their hands to settle over Sonic’s stomach, warm and comfortable, using the quiet moment while everyone was distracted with meals and chatter to simply enjoy his husband’s presence.

They stayed like that for a moment, Sonic trying to give Shadow as long as he needed, before the former started to fidget. “... Okay I love you and all but if I have to sit here staring at this pile of chilli dogs without eating any for a single second longer I might actually lose it.”

Shadow laughed, pulling away to allow Sonic freedom of movement. “Did you not eat this morning before getting ready?”

“‘course I did, but that was hours ago!”

“Chaos, I love you.”

One chilli dog already down and chilli smeared around his face, Sonic beamed and kissed his husband (despite his protests about getting chilli all over him). “Love you too!”

“We were right to get rid of that white suit.”

Sonic glanced down at the crumbs on his chest with a sheepish grin. “Oh yeah. That was a good call.”

The marquee was lively with laughter and warmth as the wedding guests all ate their fill.

[letmeoutofthebasementt]

Felix Possessiveness

SKZ Possessiveness series pt. 3: (when they're in a serious relationship do they get possessive at all? What makes them possessive if they get possessive? How do they act in a relationship? What's their response/behavior when possessive? How do they handle it?)

Felix can be the possessive type, but it's not obvious, nor is it a side of himself he really gives the time of day. He trusts his partners a lot, and is generally optimistic about certain things. He also knows his worth. That's literally what I got, 'I know my worth'. At the end of the day, anyone who would do something to risk losing him isn't worth having? In his mind. He's more possessive than jealous though, I will say.

He feels lucky to have his partners when he has them. Like they're a dream come true, or some divine gift.

His work-life imbalance definitely amplifies those feelings though. Because he's on the other side of the world and his partner is back wherever they are, and it stresses him out. Because he's someone who likes having his partner near. He likes knowing what they're doing, he likes being in the loop. Obviously, they're allowed independence, but he's also in general someone who likes being close to his loved ones or it gives him anxiety, because he feels like he has to look after them and make sure they're OK and safe. So when his partner is away, it stresses him out a lot.

He's the type who's constantly stalking people's locations on Find My. Like checking every five minutes. Probably texts the other members when they're at chipotle with his order saying he'll pay them back, and they're just like 'WTF?'.

That's what he's like. He likes keeping tabs on people and generally just...Knowing everything about them. He's very nosey.

He also just doesn't like competition. Not in a jealous way but in a possessive way. Like 'We're supposed to be together and you're supposed to be devoted to ME. We're supposed to belong to each other so why TF are you letting this person encroach on MY PLACE in your life?' Shit like that. And then he gets pissed and blows up, and you argue about it.

And Felix is stubborn. One thing about him, during arguments he is never wrong. NEVER. He can AND WILL argue for hours, tears streaming down his face, until he wears you down and you're just like 'whatever', something gets in the way of it continuing, or you give in. It very rarely happens, but when it does he's gone. And he's a loud arguer.

Felix is the type to walk away to cool down after an argument, and actually think about what he did/said and your side. So he can calm down and collect his thoughts and be rational. And that's when he realizes 'Oh, i'm being overly possessive right now' or whatever the argument was about.

But if YOUUUU walk away? He starts tweaking to the highest caliber. Because in his mind, in that moment you're trying to walk out on him, and so he'll 100% try and stop you. Because he's like 'Well why don't you want to be near me?' Because when he gets genuinely really angry he's not necessarily thinking straight. All he's thinking about is getting his point across.

But I also think those arguments would effectively stop those behaviors, at least in that specific relationship? Because it's line 'damn, I almost fucked it all. up. And for what?' Like, that moment of self-awareness after is revolutionary for him.

In general, he doesn't like how possessive he can get because it conflicts with the rest of him. He's a more light and fun and happy and optimistic person. He's more floating on cloud nine, detached, doing his own thing. Which always makes the fallout worse because he's having this internal conflict every time those feelings come up.

So, nowadays he doesn't show it at all. He used to when he was younger and more immature, but now he pushes down and ignores that side of him, and is trying to grow from those behaviors.

[atiny-for-life]

Ateez's Full Storyline Explained - Part 25

Masterlist

Golden Hour: Pt. 3 - In Your Fantasy Diary - Entries:

Thank you to @thirstkanaphan for tagging me in this post so I could find out about the new Diary Entries <3

We pick up right where the last entries left off with all the members reuniting once they tracked down Yunho and Mingi at a nearby café. They wake them up with the music Jongho had prepared, proving once more that their shared memories and emotional bond are what is freeing them from Sopro's influence.

As they were tracking down Yunho and Mingi, the other six also realized why Mingi had deleted his social media posts - he'd been embarrassed. Yet again a new emotion learned by Sopro which had immediately been projected onto everyone in their vicinity.

People were embarrassed to even be perceived so they hid out in the streets, each flushed red as they scurried about, peeking around corners, afraid to be noticed.

While still inside the café, Sopro moves on to another host - something they only take note of because the people around them begin acting differently.

They bit their lips and clenched their fists, looking like they were desperately holding back the urge to run away. It was an emotion that looked like embarrassment but with an undertone of restraint. What was it called again? Oh! That's right! Wooyoung: "Shame." That was it. The people were now ashamed.

We switch perspectives and once again see the world through Sopro's eyes.

I feel like I'm dying. I'm so sad. Depressed. Why is this only happening to me? What the hell did I do wrong? It's so painful. It's too hard. I'm lonely. How am I supposed to keep on living like this from now on?

We now learn what it was like for Sopro in the last entries when it was in the factory owner's body and experiencing despair for the first time in its existence.

It felt like it was drowning, like it was dying, until the body it was in began to cry out the sadness and allowed it to escape. It fled across the Han River, in search for new experiences, until it found another body - the body of a woman currently out on a walk with someone she seems to be in love with.

In a short moment, countless worries passed through the woman's mind. But when the man brushed a stray lock of hair out of the woman's face, she turned red again, and all her thoughts stopped. It felt like being propelled back and forth uncontrollably on a rollercoaster. While the woman liked the man, she was also overcome by the desire to run away and hide. Yet, at the same time, she didn't want to leave him either, and was worried about how she looked to him right now. She felt good, but also a little nauseous as if she were motion-sick, or perhaps hungover.

This is how Mingi and Yunho were feeling while hiding away inside the café - it's what triggered Mingi to delete his social media posts.

While still inside the woman's body, Sopro also experiences shame for the first time as they bump into a group of people who know the woman.

They looked at the woman and spoke sheepishly as if they were embarrassed by her. At that moment, I fell from the clouds. The clouds disappeared, and the space around me slowly darkened.

I'm so embarrassed. What the hell do they even think of me? Why did I have to run into them here? The woman thought, and I thought the same. I want to run away, I want to disappear.

And then she truly does begin to run, away from the people, from the man she was with, from everything, until they collide with somebody we know all too well.

Yunho, as we now learn, has a so-called "spirit scanner" in his possession which has helped them track down Sopro. And of course, he gets teased for it:

Mingi:  "It really worked. The spirit scanner." Yeosang:  "To think someone studying archaeology would have such a pseudo-scientific thing. I don't believe it." Yunho: "Thanks for the input, but don't you think we should focus on catching it right now?"

The other members keep talking to the woman in an attempt to keep her calm and let her know what's going on (vaguely), but as it turns out, the woman is truly no longer in charge of her own body. We're still seeing things from Sopro's POV:

I used the woman again to speak. "No, you've got it all wrong. No one's messing with my emotions." San: "You only think that way because Sopro's inside you. Sopro has the power to control people's emotions as it pleases." Hongjoong: "Just a moment ago, you felt ashamed, right? I don't know for sure if that's what Sopro felt, or if those emotions were purely yours... But, because you have Sopro in you, those feelings are infecting everyone around us. Look."

As Sopro lays eyes on the people around them, it begins to wonder if it really is to blame for their bizarre behavior. But while it's still stuck trying to process it all, Mingi already holds the woman's phone up to its face - the phone he'd just unlocked with the woman's finger.

On screen, a video is playing, one taken by the woman of her puppy as she was trying to teach him how to give paw. Still in Sopro's POV:

The woman held out her hand, and the puppy nuzzled its face against her. The woman laughed and petted the dog, and the dog happily enjoyed the affection. My head felt as though it might crack. The woman crouched down and rubbed her temples. As she did so, the men who had been holding her let go. "Come! Follow me." The woman in the video ran backwards, filming the dog. Then the dog ran towards the woman. The woman here outside the video began to heave. A vortex sped toward me. If I got caught in that vortex, I would be forced outside again. I had this feeling that I shouldn't go outside, not now. As I ran away from the vortex, the dog from the video began running toward me from the opposite side. The woman must be recalling memories of her dog. But, unlike the bright image in the video, the dog snarled at me, showing its fangs. He barked and growled loudly, as if trying to protect the woman and telling me to get out — now! He was telling me that if I ignored his warning, he would attack. I backed up. At that moment, I was swept away by the vortex from behind. Hongjoong: "It's out!" Wooyoung:  "Look! It's definitely bigger than before." Seonghwa: "Wooyoung, quick!"

And this is the moment where things become a whole lot more emotionally charged.

We're still with Sopro who is now getting trapped on the ground under Wooyoung's shoe and, as we get to hear its thoughts, we can see there's a one-sided connection there between the two that Wooyoung doesn't seem to have picked up on - but Sopro has:

While I was also saddened by the fact that I was being stepped on and couldn't move, the fact that it was my mother bird, of all people, who was causing me to suffer came as a much bigger sadness. I felt a much bigger mixture of emotions that felt both like the sea of sadness and what the woman felt running into friends she didn't want to meet. It was fear. And resentment. I wanted to run up to my mother bird and be adored like the puppy and the woman. So why was he hurting me like this? He stepped on me even harder, and dirt flew up from the ground. I was pushed deeper into the dirt. Deeper, deeper... Would I be pushed underground? The mother bird won't be able to catch me. Because when he finally takes his foot off to look at me, I won't be there. I've already run away...down...

We skip ahead in time, away from Sopro's POV and find out that, while Sopro hasn't acted up again, the spread of its power had actually been way more far reaching than initially expected:

The problem was that the abnormal phenomenon was not limited to just one country. Modern science could not explain why the world's population all felt the same thing at the same time. Some groups viewed the event as a religious phenomenon, and others thought it might have been something similar to the instinctual group reactions of birds and rats right before a disaster.

Anxious about what might have happened to Sopro and whether it will return or not, Yunho spent those same days holed up inside the library, trying to uncover whether there was a historical record in the A-World about an artifact like Sopro.

By accident, he discovered a section of the library that was not on the book record map, and began reading through the books there as if he were possessed. He found a book by a scholar specializing in legends and myths based on the theory that the universe is composed of multiple dimensions. As soon as he read the introduction to the book, Yunho knew he needed to meet him. This was the introduction: 'It is a great error to assume that the artifacts of our world can only be interpreted by the logic of our world.' Jongho: "That man... Isn't that Left Eye?"

Upon going to meet their world's Left Eye at his lab, the members learn that this version of him also has a daughter - one who is alive and well - and that he believes in their experiences of Z-World.

Additionally, he also shares with them a picture of a long-dead king wearing a necklace with an embedded ruby-red stone, one very much reminiscent of Sopro.

"Legend says that it was a gift given to the king by a huge bird — a spiritual creature. As a stone with the ability to move the hearts of all things, it was gifted to the king as a symbol of his love for the people." Mingi:  "Hearts... Yeah, that does sound like Sopro." The members examined the paper again. Below the picture was the following text: "Legends such as these often come with warnings. The nature of this stone is like a child, and the king in possession of this stone becomes the parent of that child. Therefore, if the king has an evil heart, the child will learn that wickedness, and if the king has a good heart, it will learn goodness." Wooyoung: "A child." The line comparing the nature of the stone to a young child caught Wooyoung's eye.

But while the members are still stuck on the similarities between the two worlds' legends, Yeosang is already on his tablet, looking for clues about where Sopro might have disappeared to or if it's truly gone.

Yeosang: "It didn't disappear, it was just hiding!" Yeosang turned his tablet to the members. On the screen was a live clip of a video creator searching for true ghost stories. He talked while walking through a graveyard. A statue that didn't exist until yesterday suddenly appeared overnight, and monsters were rising from the ground. The bust statue, made of corpse, bone, soil, and grass, had grown into a human shape. With a shriek, its eyes shot open. It looked enraged. People watching the live video called it "the resurrection of Frankenstein". Not long after, a war broke out over there.

It seems Sopro has built itself a body so it will no longer have to depend on a human host. And that is where the story ends. For now.

[bricksduhh]

X's and O's

Thanos x Male reader

Pt: 3 (pt:2)

The voting continues as players try to convince each other to vote to go home or stay. You and Thanos seem to be growing more apart due to the situation you are both in. One of you more oblivious to it then the other.

(I'm trying my best not to leave too long of a wait between each of these, but I also don't want to rush them, so I apologise if they take too long. I'm trying my best to write as much between the reader and thanos while also following the story, so sorry if it seems there are very few interactions)

You felt your heart pounding with each new vote. Your eyes never left the screen that displayed the results, eagerly watching the numbers go up one by one. Thanos had voted to stay. Although it hurt you knew he would. Especially with the way he ran up to the voting station, almost like he was excited to continue. As Thanos receives his patch, player 456 calls out again.

“Wait a minute! Everyone, wait!” He runs in between the two crowds, hands out trying to get everyone's attention. “You can't do this. Come to your senses! Don't you see? These aren't just games. We will all die if we keep playing.” There was a sound of desperation in his voice. You felt sorry for him. You weren't sure why though. “We have to get out of here now.” He points to the score board. “With a majority vote we can! We must stop here!”

“Who do you think you are!?” You look over the crowd, trying to make out who shouted back. He sounded older. You watch as player 100 steps forward. “Why do you keep egging people on like that? You scared us by saying they would shoot us before the game began!” More people began shouting towards player 456. You couldn't even keep up with what everyone was saying, voices coming from every direction in the room. It was getting too much for you. People trying to defend the man and others assuming maybe he was one of the guards disguised as a player.

Player 456 snaps. “I've played these games before!” In that moment you could've sworn you could hear a pin drop. The silence was deafening. Everyone seemed shocked at the man's words. What did he mean before? You couldn't understand why he would come back here if he already played. “I knew about the first game because I had played it before!” The man continued, telling everyone he had come here 3 years ago, and everyone else with him had died.

“Hold on” A man looks at 456. “If they all died, how did you survive alone?” You could feel the tension in the room growing, it only makes you want to leave this place even more. “Wait, are you saying you are the sole survivor.”

456 looks up to the man. “That's right, I was the final winner” Mumbling filled the room, people not sure whether to believe him or not. “If we continue these games, every single person here, just like all the people back then, will die here.” You felt your heart skip a beat.

You looked over at Thanos, hoping the man's words changed his mind. You heard people calling 456 a liar but you weren't listening to them anymore. Thanos’ attention was only stuck on 456. He seemed to be thinking. Thanos began to walk over to the man. “If you really won, it actually works better for us.” You clenched your hand into a fist as Thanos started to speak. “You can give us some tips.” He points to 456. “On how to beat these games”

“That's right!” Player 100 calls out, agreeing with Thanos’ point. “We have a previous winner with us, so what do we have to worry about?” You couldn't believe what you were hearing. There was no way people still considered staying. That Thanos considered staying. What if one of you two died here? “Come on, let's do this!” Following the man's words everyone in the crowds began cheering along. You felt a pit in your stomach, knowing the chances of going home have been reduced drastically. You closed your eyes, accepting the fact you might die here now.

You watch as one of the guards walks down in between the two crowds. He stopped behind 456, holding a gun to his back. “From here on, we will not tolerate actions that disrupt the voting process.” They explained. The voting continued, more and more people choosing to stay. It came to the last vote. Both sides were tied. You stood there, wishing that the last player would decide to leave. As he walked up you felt your heart racing. Your hands shook. Then the number underneath O goes up by 1. You hear everyone on the O team cheer, celebrating their victory. You let out a sigh. You were officially stuck here for another game.

After the guards leave you watch as both sides don't mingle instead sticking to groups. The X's stayed on their side while the O's did the same. You began to walk to a bed when you heard Thanos calling out. “Baby come over here” you turned to face him as he walked up to you, player 124 and someone new, player 256 following behind him. Thanos brings you in for a huge. “My boy, come here” You don't hug him back, just let him wrap his arms around you. He pulls back, placing his hands on your shoulders. “One more game.” He nods at you with a smirk. “One more and then imagine the money we can get.” You bit your cheek.

“One more and maybe the guards put a bullet in my head.” You slapped his hands away. Thanos looks at you, a bit shocked at your response. As if he expected you to be happy to play another game.

“Baby don't say that, I promised you I'll protect you.” You didn't even want to listen to him right now. You wanted to be alone. “Anyways, that crazy dude said he knows what games we will be playing. We have practically already won.”

You rolled your eyes letting out a scoff. “You cannot be serious right now.” You watch as 124 steps forward.

“He doesn't seem to care.” He says looking at Thanos before looking back at you. “He voted X anyways, I don't think we would want to be involved with them.” Thanos stood there in silence as if he was processing what was said to him.

“Alright then” you said, seeing that Thanos put thought into the other man's words. You began to walk away as you heard Thanos try to call out to you. You ignored him. You just wanted space for now. To be alone. You went to the furthest bed at the top and lay down, arm over your eyes as you prepared yourself for what's to come. You heard the doors open again, this time the guards entering with food for everyone. You groaned as you got up from your resting spot and began to walk over to get your food. You joined the line that formed and waited. You glanced to your side, seeing Thanos make his way over to you.

“Finally, I am starving!” He claps his hands together and rubs them. He tried to act like everything was still OK. You try your best to ignore him, still not happy with the fact you're forced to stay here. In the end though, he was still your boyfriend and you couldn't ignore him forever.

“Yeah, so am I” you finally respond to him. He smiles down at you as he wraps his arm over your shoulder. He seemed happy that you weren't too annoyed at him now.

“They better give us something good.” He moves behind you as you are served your food. The guard hands you a water bottle and a small metal container. You give a slight nod to say thank you and start to head back to your bed. Thanos rushes when getting his food, running after you. “Wait up my boy” you turn to face him. “Come on over with me” he motions towards the two players that he was with before.

You look at the two players who seemed not so talkative with each other. “It's OK, I'd rather be alone right now anyways.” You replied shrugging. It is not that you didn't want to eat with Thanos, you just didn't like the look of his friends. Thanos looked a little hurt at your refusal to join him but he was too hungry to try to convince you. He just shrugged and mumbled an OK as he left you alone. You did feel bad but you decided to eat by yourself and then join him later.

You finally reached your bed, sitting up at the top looking out to everyone. You opened your food to see a singular egg, some rice and another assortment of food, sighing at the sight of it. You didn't care how unappetising it looked, you were too hungry to be picky right now. You grabbed your fork and began to eat in silence.

The sound of many voices at the bottom of the beds caught your attention. You peeked over noticing a group of players formed around player 456. They were talking about the next game. From what you heard it was to do with dalgona, having to cut the shape out of the candy to pass. You took a mental note of what the man said. Triangle was the easiest. You turned your attention back to your food, finishing the last couple bites. You placed the lid back onto the container and began to climb down your bed. You decided to go back over to Thanos. As you reached the bottom and began to head over you heard someone say your name.

“Y/N!” They called out. “Come over here!” You turned to see who was talking to you. It was Dae-ho. He was motioning his hand signaling for you to come join him and the others. He was sitting with Player 456, 001 and 390. You smiled as you did so, walking up and greeting the other players. Player 390 seemed to notice something on Dae-ho's arm as he walked over to him and pulled up his sleeve.

“You were in the marines?” The man asked Dae-ho. You leaned against the side of the beds, watching the two men talk. Both seemed to start bonding over being in the marines. You were a little surprised that Dae-ho used to be a marine. You honestly didn't think he looked like it'd be something he would have done. You laughed at the two men. Both shouting stuff about marines back to each other. You didn't understand any of it but it was still very entertaining.

Your attention was soon taken from the two men to a sudden commotion on the other side of the room. Getting up from your position on the bed frame at the sight of player 333 on top of Thanos with player 124 trying to pull him off. They were shouting at each other, yelling names back and forth. Player 124 finally pulls 333 up holding him in place as Thanos gets up from the ground. As Thanos stands up he swings his fist into the side of 333’s face. “Fuck” You said about to make your way over towards the fight.

Dae-ho puts his arm out in front of you, stopping you from going over. “Don't, if you try to stop them they might try to fight you too.” Before you could explain why you had to stop them you heard another punch land. You watched as 333 fell to the ground, Thanos now standing over him. He began to complain about the money that he lost because of 333. Thanos kicked his foot down onto the player's head. Soon player 124 joined in, doing the same.

“He might get really hurt, someone should stop them.” Player 390 suggested. You were about to go do just that before player 001 pushed his way between you all.

“Boys, what are you doing in the middle of mealtime?” He shouts to them, walking over. “No fights during mealtime, there are elders present. Mind your manners.” He stops in front of the 3. “and two against one? Aren't you embarrassed?”.

You watched as Thanos’ expression seemed to turn even more aggravated. “You're lecturing me when you ended up in this shithole too?” Thanos responded, walking up to the man. “Dude, stop running your mouth and take care of your own damn kids.”

“What did you just say?” player 001 said in a cold voice. Thanos moved closer to him.

“I said save the lecture for your own damn kid.” Player 001 doesn't let him finish his sentence. He reached out grabbing the side of Thanos’ neck.

“Shit” you cursed trying to move up, Dae-ho stopping you from doing so again.

“001 has this, don't worry” He said, assuming you wanted to help him and not Thanos. You looked over at the two as player 124 tries to join in, 001 kicking him in the ankle before he could do anything. He kicked 124 away and released his grip on Thanos. Thanos falls back before walking back to the man, this time trying to hit him. He failed in doing so, instead 001 hit Thanos in his chest and stomach.

You turn to Dae-ho. “Listen, I know him, I'm not going to let him get hurt.” you quickly explained yourself pointing at Thanos. 001 now twisted your boyfriends arm forcing him to the ground.

“You do?” He seemed to laugh a little. “You're friends with someone like that?” he didn't mean for his last words to come out that offensive but they did.

“More than that. He's my boyfriend.” You sighed watching as 001 kicked Thanos a few times before letting go of his arm. “I just can't watch him get hurt like this.” Dae-ho slowly moved his arm away from you, feeling bad he stopped you earlier. You looked back at the two men watching as 001 held one hand around Thanos’ neck. His other hand clenched into a fist, holding it up almost ready to strike him.

You knew you couldn't wait any longer to help Thanos. Now running over to him. “Stop” you said to 001, walking up to him. “Please. Let him go.” 001 looked up at you. “Look, he can be reckless and shit.” You looked down at Thanos as he tried to break free from the man's grasp. “I promise it won't happen again. Just please let him go.” 001 noticed the worry in your eyes. He nodded, looking back down at Thanos before letting him go. Thanos lay on the ground, coughing as he tried to catch his breath. You heard people clapping for 001 congratulating him for stopping Thanos and 124 from harming 333 and further. You knelt down beside Thanos trying to help him up. He slapped your hands away, refusing your help.

“I'm fine,” he said as he slowly got up. “You seemed too busy to even come over to me anyways” You looked at him, a bit shocked at his sudden aggression towards you.

“What do you mean?” You walked behind him as he made his way over to his bed. Watching as he sat down beside player 124.

“Well you say you want to be alone but then I see you talking to that fucker again.” He said, throwing his hand up, motioning towards Dae-ho.

“You can't be serious.” You looked at him. “I was coming to you after i finished eating but he called me over that's it.”

“So you then you let the other guy come over and beat the shit out of me before helping?” Thanos looked away from you, his hand on his side trying to ease the pain.

“No I didn't. I tried to help, but Dae-ho kept stopping me. He didn't know I knew you, so he made sure I wasn't going to hurt myself.” You tried to explain your side to him. He didn't seem to care.

“So now he chooses what you do and don't do?” Thanos snapped at you. “You would rather listen to a random guy than help your own boyfriend?” You were a bit shocked at Thanos saying boyfriend. He was never one to explicitly call you his boyfriend or anything like that. The most he did was call you baby. Anything else he called you was stuff he would call others. You could tell that you not helping him earlier really did hurt him as you've never seen him this serious before either.

“I know, I should have helped you, I'm sorry.” You apologised to him. “I just panicked. I wasn't sure what to do.” You tried to justify why you took so long to help.

“Whatever” He looked at you, clearly not satisfied with your apology. “You can go back over to your new friends now”

“No” You stood your ground. “You're my boyfriend, and you're hurt. I'm not going to leave you” You sat down beside him. “So I'm staying.” You could tell from the look on his face he was surprised you actually stayed this time. You all sat in silence for a bit before player 124 made a comment about the fight. Thanos and him began to shit talk both 333 and 001. You didn't care for that conversation, so you looked around the room. Your eyes meeting with Dae-ho's. He looked worried about you sitting with Thanos. You gave him a reassuring look. The lights in the room began to dim, signalling it was almost time for lights out.

You got up from the bed. “You tired?” You looked down at Thanos. He nodded as he got up too. “OK come on then, let's go to bed.” You made your way over to your bed, Thanos following behind you. His mood was still ruined by the previous fight as he walked with his head down. You both silently got into bed as you removed your jacket, now only in your shirt and sweatpants. You got under the thin bedsheets. Thanos pulled up the sheets and lay beside you. “You feeling OK?” You asked him. He didn't respond. You could tell from his body language that the drugs he previously took were wearing off so you just assumed he was too tired now. He still lay there in silence as you sighed and turned over onto your side.

You felt Thanos do the same as he threw his arm over you, his chest up against your back and his chin resting on your shoulder. He held onto you tightly. “Goodnight babe” you said to him as you closed your eyes.

“Goodnight baby” was all you heard from him before you both fell asleep.

[morningstarwrites]

(Part 2) Café AU, which I made bc I created a ko-fi ☕

Part 1 here

[corkinavoid]

Hey, @confused-they, this is for you and for everyone else who wanted more of this AU. Merry Christmas.

DPxDC Ring of Rage? More Like Ring of Engage [pt. 4]

[<- part 3 | additional notes ->]

[Written to 'Tantrum' by Ashnikko]

TW: mentioned mild gore (some inside parts become outside ones, nothing graphic)

Tim can't breathe.

Joker's mad laughter is ringing through the darkness of the warehouse, echoing in his head, the screeching sound straight out of nightmares. Hood should be nearby - as in, somewhere in this darkness along with him - but Tim can't think about that, his own maniacal giggles bubbling in the back of his throat, a grin tugging at his lips.

He has to get up. He has to stand, he has to fight, and it really shouldn't be this hard.

But he can't breathe.

Tim clutches his fingers on the fabric of his suit on the chest, distantly wondering if this is how Danny feels when he is more human than ghost. Probably not, he mentioned that breathing is only optional.

He really wants his boyfriend right now. His fiance. Whatever, he wants Danny, he wants his cold hands on his cheeks and the faint, humming purr of his core that Tim finds nice to fall asleep to, and-

Maybe later. He can't exactly summon him now, not in the middle of a fight, especially not in the middle of a fight with Joker of all people.

There's an angry growl somewhere to Tim's left, staticky through the voice-modulator. Then several sounds of gunshots and a gleeful, taunting yell of the madman.

Hold on.

Tim snaps his eyes open - not that anything changes, everything is still pitch-black around him - and blinks.

Why not?..

It's not like Danny is a civilian. Tim tends to pay little attention to the fact since the King of Infinite Realms doesn't hang out with the whole superhero convention on principle. But Tim is pretty sure he won't mind it this once.

Besides, Tim is so done with Joker that it's not even funny.

A few breathy chuckles escape his throat as he lets his body fully slump back on the floor and brings his left hand to his face, placing a quick kiss on the Ring through his glove. He doesn't need to do that, not really, but it's kind of a ritual at this point, and the gesture somehow makes him feel better.

"Danny," he whispers.

For a long moment, nothing happens.

Then, there's a soft, popping sound, and his beautiful boyfriend is floating right over him, faintly glowing and a little sleepy. Tim is momentarily distracted by his bare feet and pj pants with tiny rockets on them.

Danny yawns and tugs the hem of his t-shirt down as it starts to float. "Whas'sup," he mutters, rubbing his eyes and clearly not fully awake, and Tim's heart melts instantly. He loves Danny. He just... He loves him, okay? He loves that Danny didn't question his summons for a moment, he loves that he came even though he was obviously sleeping, and he loves that Danny is wearing a tee he stole from Tim.

Unfortunately, before he is able to get his shit back together, another sound of gunshot ripples through the air, and Danny startles, blinking himself awake and looking in the direction of it. Then, his eyebrows shoot up, and his mouth makes a soft 'O' shape before he turns back to Tim and tilts his head in question.

"You want me to deal with him? The clown, I mean, not your brother," he asks, and it's so casual and off-handed that Tim actually huffs a laugh.

"Sorry, I was just- I'm really tired of his ass," Tim should probably sit up, this is not a talk they should have while he is lying on the ground. On the other hand, Jason is somewhere out there, and he has guns and doesn't have a clear visual around him, so maybe Tim shouldn't sit up.

Danny hums, "Is that a yes?"

Tim just nods. He is pretty sure Danny can see him despite the darkness. "I promise it's a one-time thing, I don't plan on calling you every time one of local lunatics acts up. I just... I fucking can't with him," he admits with a defeated sigh. But, before he can spiral any further into the abyss of unworthiness, Danny's cold hands are cupping his cheeks, and his icy eyes are looking right into Tim's sky blue.

"Love, I don't mind getting rid of each and every one of your Rogues. Granted, it would probably fuck up the timeline, and Clocky would be mad, but I'd do it if you want me to, no questions asked." His voice is quiet, and Tim has never been more grateful for his domino mask, because he can feel his cheeks heating up and he doesn't want Danny to see the exact effect his words are causing.

"I- Okay," he quietly agrees, and then blinks, backtracking, "Wait, no, don't fuck up the timeline. Just deal with the laughing bitch this once, and that's it. We can handle the rest."

Danny is smiling at him in that adoring way Tim recognizes as 'I really want to kiss you, but it's not the time or place'. Then, he nods and lets go of Tim's cheeks, straightening up in the air, and his clothes shift all at once, like a magic trick.

Gone are the stretched out t-shirt and the pants with rocket ships. In their place, Danny's body is head to toe covered in stars and galaxies that hold the vague shape of armor, and there's a slightly shimmering, blueish-green translucent cape over one of his shoulders.

The Crown over his head, the sentient artifact much like the Ring on Tim's finger, appears from nowhere, and, after a brief pause - Tim swears it was debating on whether or not the situation is worth the effort - promptly sets itself on fire. Blue flames cast long shadows on Danny's, no, King's face, making him look older and his cheekbones sharper.

Before, the boy was only faintly glowing, and, evidently, the others present in the warehouse were too distracted to notice him.

But now, with the flaming Crown casting dancing shadows on the walls of the warehouse, it's really hard not to see the otherworldly being making an appearance.

"Holy fuck," Tim hears Hood's quiet, astonished voice, and almost cracks a grin.

Yeah, he wants to say, that's my boyfriend. Although he suspects he and Jason are having vastly different reactions to Danny's presence. Because Tim kind of wants to take all his words about dealing with Joker back and take Danny home, straight to bed.

...He is going to have to strangle Jason in his sleep if his reaction is similar. No, that's a wrong thought, this is so not the time for it.

"Who are you, flying glowstick?" Joker sounds rightfully pissed off by the interruption, "Does Batsy employ alien kids now?"

Danny chuckles, the starry freckles on his cheeks glowing brighter, "Okay, just because you compared me to an alien, I'm not going to completely erase you from this plane of existence."

Tim snaps his head up.

"Wait, no killing," he reminds, not because he actually cares but because B would throw a fit. Danny brushes him off with a wave of his hand.

"No worries, he'll stay alive," he smiles at Tim, and to everyone else, it probably looks like stuff of nightmares, sharp, pointy teeth and lips stretched out far beyond human capabilities. But Tim sees it for what it is: a face of mischief.

"Do I get a vote in this?" Jason's deadpan voice comes from somewhere on the other side of the warehouse at the same moment as Joker screeches in rage, "Who the fuck do you think-"

"Nope," Danny pops the 'p', and Tim is not sure if he is answering to Hood or refusing to listen to the clown's monolog by it. Maybe it's both. It's probably both.

The next moment, Danny is gone, disappeared from the place he was floating at, and Tim hears a wet, very unpleasant sound followed by Joker's scream of pain.

"You see this?" He hears Danny's nonchalant, unfazed voice above the clown's pained cries, "This is your rib, bitch- Hey, quit whining and listen to me, it's important."

There's a slap, a rustle, and a sound of ripping fabric, and Joker's voice becomes muffled, like someone put a gag in his mouth.

"You're like Adam now, you know, lacking one rib," Danny continues, "Only I'm not making you a girl out of this one, I'm pretty sure you don't deserve to reproduce. Anyway, going further down that metaphor, I'm the God almighty in this situation, so if you want to keep the rest of your ribs - and the rest of other things that are supposed to stay inside of you - to yourself, you gotta do a thing for me, okay?"

There's some muffled groans that Joker makes in response, then an enraged growl, a sound of a struggle, another slap, and then that same wet, disgusting squelch.

"Two ribs, wow, okay, you're really being difficult about this!" Danny sounds so innocently dumbstruck about it that Tim suppresses a laugh. "Are you listening now?" There's a quiet, choking wheeze that answers him, and Danny sounds quite pleased when he says, "Great."

Tim debates if he should look. He doesn't exactly want to since the sounds provide enough context, but it might be somewhat cathartic for him.

And then the air around him inexplicably shifts, becoming cold and oppressive, weighting Tim down like a heavy blanket and pushing him into the floor. The dancing shadows and the blue light of flames on the walls twist and churn, like taking aim, and Tim doesn't know what Danny looks like right now but he knows he is as far from human as possible, his voice coming with a staticky, echoing whisper, a threatening hiss slithering inside Tim's ears.

"Play your little games all you want, Fallen Jester, but know that you can not win. The punchline to your joke is long overdue, and your soul has belonged to me for quite some time now," his words are cold and uncaring, and in all the time Tim has known his boyfriend, he has never heard him speak like this: with a sense of lazy power, like he is only humoring the people around him.

Like they mean nothing to him.

"I will not kill you, or at least not here and now. My Guiding Star doesn't want to see my hands dirty with your filthy remains. Besides, death is only a moment, and you don't deserve only a moment of suffering," he huffs a short, humorless chuckle, "But, luckily, I am the Eyes of the Universe, the Titan's Bane, the King of the Dead, and everyone will meet me once their eyes fall shut for the last time," there's a smile in his voice now, full of cold and merciless anticipation. Tim feels a shiver run down his spine.

"So just you wait, Jester, and I will meet you on the other side. Then we'll see how whatever is left of your soul is going to spend an eternity."

Tim's ears are ringing with the pure, somehow gleeful hatred that laces those last words. He didn't know he could literally taste the disgust and the promise of pain, and yet, here he is, with a hint of something sour on his tongue.

And then, the heavy, weighted air that has been charged with power is lifted, the shadows and bright blue lights are all gone, and Danny, wearing his pj's and smiling, is standing over him. His feet are planted on the ground for once, and the Crown is gone without a trace, but his t-shirt is still trying to float up. The boy tugs it down again, offering a hand to Tim.

"Wanna go out for a burger since I'm already here in Gotham?"

Tim had never breathed easier in his life. He laughs a little and reaches up, taking his beautifully unhinged boyfriend's hand and standing up.

"I thought you'd never ask."

[melodiesz]

sukunas need to be around you‪‪

⊹₊⟡⋆ In which you confront him about his little habit again, and he finally admits to it.

Getting the Sukuna Ryomen to admit that he had a tendency he couldn’t control was a strong feat, but your victory was short-lived. cause just as easily as Sukuna shed an old habit, he formed a brand new one.

This new habit? He had to be in the same room as you at all times. Doesn’t matter where, doesn’t matter when, you’ll always turn to see Sukuna lurking somewhere nearby.

And yet as soon as you spot him he’d look away, clearly still butt-hurt you’d teased his little (huge) staring problem. Acting as if it was your fault he had to stop, and not because of his massive ego.

whether you minded him following you around like a stray dog or not didn’t matter since he had no intention of stopping. In his logic, you couldn’t point it out if you had no proof it was happening!

There were times where he did make his presence purposefully obvious, but only when he could play it off as having nothing to do with you—always denying your claims.

“tch, following you? Don’t kid yourself, I’m simply admiring my gardens.” he claimed, but flushed and stormed off when you questioned why he had to walk right beside you to do so.

Painting? Screw that flower pot, he’s a much better muse.

You’re trying to shower in peace? Make room, suddenly he’s filthy.

Catching up with friends? He’s lurking in the background, pretending to be busy as if his holes-in-newspaper type setup could really fool you.

It’s a kind of clingy you don't understand, especially since he continues the act of being annoyed with you as if he isn’t making you play a daily game of Where’s-Waldo.

And it wasn't an overbearing presence, just a confusing one. since every time you'd spot him (which was nearly every time, he had the stealth of a bull equipped with a foghorn.), he would flee like you were the strange one.

Now Sukuna trying to hide his massive form was like a bear attempting to hide behind a lamp post. He was obvious, and you knew the humiliation of it was killing him, so you granted him the gift of pretending not to notice.

Just like with the staring, you quickly got used to this little quirk of his and embraced it. It confused you that he tried to hide, since he knew just how much you enjoyed being around him, but you shrugged it off as Sukuna just being Sukuna.

Little did you know, he was secretly worried you'd point it out like you had his incessant staring, and out of pure overbearing embarrassment and pride he'd be forced to stop his favourite pastime ‹/𝟹.

a/n: yes I did make the header and I’m think I’m so funny 😋 pls leave a comment if you enjoyed or want more Sukuna !! Thank you ❤︎

pt.1 : his staring problem <3 pt.3 :can’t beat them? Join em’!

[cosmic-dust-poltergeist]

Thinking about a forever teen Danny interacting with the batfam.. again lmao

[Pt 2 here]

The first time Danny interacted with a Bat was when he was squatting in what he assumed was an abandoned apartment in crime alley. Spoiler alert; it wasn't abandoned! It was, in fact, Red Hood's safe house.

Danny had been napping on the "surprisingly nice" bed, (The bed being so nice should have tipped him off, but he was so tired, damnit.) when Red Hood enters the room, startling Danny awake. They stare at each other for a minute, since neither expected to see another person there. Danny breaks the moment by diving off the bed, snatching up his backpack, and launching himself out the window he had crawled in from. Danny ignores the cussing and calling for him to wait.

Danny ain't no fool. Just because the world seems to be mostly accepting of metas and aliens, doesn't mean they're accepting of him. They haven't repealed the Ecto-Acts in the last 30 years. He refuses to be a lab rat for some shady government because a "hero" wants to "save" him. He's older than most of these fuckers in spandex, and is technically a king, so they got no authority over him.

"Kid! Come back!" Red Hood is keeping up rather well, but not well enough.

"Eat shit!" Danny shouts back before using his small size to squeeze into a space between 2 run down buildings that can't even count as an alley. Red Hood can't fit by a long shot, so he grapples to the roof, probably hoping to cut Danny off. Unfortunately for Red Hood, Danny isn't going that way or back. No, there's a secret passage entrance Danny throws himself through.

He doesn't like being down there. Too many undead roam the halls and can sense him. He's not sure how to help them and currently can't access the realms to ask Frostbite, so he just gives them some of his ectoplasum and tries to get out before their "Masters" notice him. He feels guilty every time.

But all in all, his first accidental Bat meeting was less than 10 minutes.

--

The second Bat he "meets" is the stabby new Robin. Danny figured crime alley was a bust, so he'd try one of the nicer areas to not cross paths with Red Hood. Unfortunately, the shady building he decided to sleep in the rafters of got invaded by the Bats a few days later. He's not sure who else was there, but Robin ended up in the same rafters.

They stare at each other for a minute, just taking in the other person who's not supposed to be in these rafters. Robin is clearly sneaking in to bust the owners, and Danny looks like some scruffy homeless kid that was just sleeping.

"What are you doing here?" Robin whispers with a scowl.

"I was sleeping." Danny scowls right back.

"Why are you sleeping here?"

"What does it look like? Not all of us have sugar daddies, bird boy."

Was that mean? Yes. Should he act like the 44 year old he technically is? Yeah, but he's frozen at 14. He can be a brat. No one can stop him. And also, this is the second time a Bat has woken him up from a nap, the first time was only a week ago. He's not feeling very mature.

Robin grits his teeth before his com goes off, distracting him, and Danny takes advantage of that, grabs his shit and phases through the wall into the next building.

--

The third time he meets a Bat is truly his undoing. He got stabbed in front of Nightwing during an attempted mugging. He hates the universe and totally blames Clockwork.

Danny was minding his own business when he got dragged into an alley by 3 drunk men. They're holding knives and trying their best to intimate him.

"Give us all your money."

"Do I look like I have money?" Danny snarks, waving a hand in a "look at me" way. Which, yeah, he's pulling off the homeless kid look really well with how dirty and worn out his clothes. No one in their right mind would look at him and think he has money.

"Hm. Well, if you don't have money, I can think of something else you can give us."

"Yeah, please struggle. It makes it more fun." Well, shit, Danny was not expecting to be grabbed by pedos. Danny bare gets to think about how it'll be good stress relief to break all the bones in their limbs before a tall shadowy figure drops from the roof and lands on the attacker farthest from him. The landing breaks the pedo's leg, his screamings about it are cut off by a sharp punch to the face.

When the shadowy figure straightens and is revealed to be Nightwing, pedo #2 charges him. Between how poorly it goes for him and all the puns and quips Nightwing is making, Danny can't help the giggles that slips out.

"You think this is funny, brat??" Pedo #3 shouts at him.

"Yeah. It's hilarious." Danny maliciously grins at him.

"Why you, just die, whore." And before Danny can question how HE's a whore, he's been stabbed. And it's a pretty good stab if you want to kill someone. It's a jagged downward stab, it nicks his heart and completely fucks up one of his lungs, and the guy even goes the extra step of pulling the knife out. All in all. The perfect stab to kill someone.

Unfortunately for him, Danny isn't just someone. He's already mostly dead, which means while it hurts like a bitch and it's hard to breath, it won't kill him. It does suck he coughs up some blood before he turns off his need to breathe.

Danny ignores the cussing and sounds of Nightwing breaking bones, probably panicking over just seeing "a kid get murdered". And unfortunately, no breathing means no talking in this form. So the poor guy can't be verbally told Danny's fine, and to stop freaking out. Good thing saying something isn't always needed.

Danny lets his eyes turn a glowing bright green before silently stepping to his would-be murderer.

"What?? What the fuck??" Pedo #3 screeches. Danny gives him a blood filled smile before reaching up, grabbing the wrist of the hand holding the knife. He breaks the guy's arm in less than a second, before slamming him into the disgusting alley ground and proceeds to break both of his legs. The way Danny crashed the bones in these limbs means the guy is never going to have full mobility again, but Danny can't even pretend to care. The man targeted what looked like a scrawny 14 year old homeless kid to rape and murder. If anything, Danny is letting him off easy.

"K-kid? Are you okay? What am I saying? Of course not." Nightwing frets and tries to get closer, but Danny is tired of... well everything, so he just turns and books it out of the alley. Danny ignores Nightwing's frantic shouting as he twists and turns out of the man's sight long enough to pull up his invisibility without outing the power. He watches a panicked Nightwing run by before tapping into his flight and taking off to the nearest graveyard. Sitting in the ambient ectoplasum there while drinking what he has left in his thermos will speed up his healing.

He'd so leave this shithole of a city if he could. But Lady Gotham won't let him go and he's positive Clockwork is working with her to keep him there. He doesn't know what they're planning, but he hates it already.

---

After the stabbing, Nightwing and the other two must have spilled about him, because he's suddenly dodging Bats everywhere he goes. He starts developing even worse paranoia because they just won't take a hint.

Talking was a no go at first with his healing lung, but running away, swiping claws, biting, and throwing shit at them aren't exactly subtly "Leave Me The Fuck Alone!!" vibes. Once his lung is healed, you can add in cussing, hissing, spitting, and verbally telling them to fuck off. None of it works. It fact, Danny thinks they like the challenge, which is annoying, but slowly becoming amusing.

Though, even just the idea of him starting to enjoy something means the universe has to throw a curve ball. And this one takes the form of a scarecrow attack.

So admittedly, Danny had no idea what fear toxin would do to him, but Joker's toxins didn't do anything to him, so he thought it'd be the same shit. That was a stupid mistake on his part.

He didn't bother holding his breath when helping the Panicked Bats get civilians out of the attack radius. Any mask that was given to him was given to a civilian before he passed them off to someone with an antidote.

But to be fair, the effects of his mistake doesn't hit him til after the fight is over and the civilians are taken care of. It starts with his paranoia raising. He's suddenly eyeing the people and buildings around him. He can FEEL his parents' gaze on him, even though he knows that's impossible, they died because the portal finally blew up and took them and half the town with it. No one who died as humans from it became ghosts, and the people who were already ghosts died a second time. The only reason Danny and Tucker weren't there was because they were gift shopping for Jazz on the other side of town while Sam distracted her. It was one of the worst days of his life. It's tied with the day his parents vivisecting his ghost half and the day the GIW vivisected Vlad and him, and Vlad just straight up died from it in front of him.

That's relevant because Danny starts hallucinating a half melted Sam and Jazz (there were no bodies left behind, but his brain likes to torment him), he can't understand what they're trying to say to him, but there's the unmistakable sound of an ectoblaster echoing in his ear behind him and he... just bolts. The agents that vivisected him launch themselves at him (he doesn't process the "agents" look exactly the same as when he last saw them 24 years ago), but Danny is determined to NEVER be caught again.

He freezes when melted versions of his parents, wearing maniac grins and holding sparking weapons, cut him off. The moment they so much as twitch towards him, he bolts straight through a building using his intangibility.

A tiny part of his brain is trying to reason with him. There's no way anything he's seeing is real. This is what fear toxin is known to do. Stop and evaluate the situation!

But it's drownt out by the fear. And, ancients, is there a lot of fear. It suffocates his logical thoughts and makes him forget how to properly use his powers to escape.

He finds out later, it took the Bats 2 hours to get close enough to give him the antidote and another hour for it to kick in. They honestly thought it didn't work at first, because just like the toxin, the antidote took it's sweet time to work on him.

He crashed out hard once it did, though. Like, he fell unconscious and stopped breathing. It terrified the Bats and took them a minute to realize he's not actually dead. Well, full dead.

He finds out eventually that they originally thought he was a meta, but after all the weirdness he accidentally showed during the cat and mouse chase, they started to wonder if he was an alien. But the whole fear toxin incident convince them he escaped from some shady organization that experimented on him (not untrue) and killed his family. There's still a bet on if he's an alien or not, and that being why he was targeted.

Which is a fair conclusion, between his powers that seemingly make no sense and all his scars from fighting and being experimented on by both his parents And a shady government agency. It's especially fair after he has a major freak out coming to in the Batcave's med bay. The smells and medical equipment setting him off into a massive panic attack that leaves him behaving like a feral cat. He manages to squeeze himself into the small space between the top of the cabinets and the ceiling and growls at anyone so much as peeking into the room.

"Hey, kid. You're alright. You're safe." Nightwing tries and gets hissed at. He'd been trying for about 10 minutes to get him to come down. "Um, guys, maybe someone else should try. This isn't working. I don't think he likes me at all."

Black Bat steps into the room at his plea and waves Nightwing away. Once he's out of the room, she drops to the floor. The move confuses Danny enough to stop growling at her. He stares wide-eyed at her as she just lays full starfish on the floor.

"What are you doing?" He finally asks after 3 full minutes of silently staring at her.

"Laying."

"I see that, but why?"

"You're scared. I'm showing I'm not a threat." Black Bat sounds amused, but not malicious. Danny stares at her for another 2 minutes without blinking once.

"Why am I here?"

"You're scared. We want to help." She makes it sound simple.

"You can't." Danny lets bitterness leak into his voice.

"Why?"

"I'm not human anymore. You can't "help" me."

"I think we can." Danny starts growling again, so she adds. "We have beds and food and can keep whoever is hunting you away."

He pauses his growling again. "You don't even know who I am."

"You're sad, and hurt, and help others before yourself. You're good." Danny frowns at that.

"You're weird." He states before climbing down and sitting near her. She doesn't move a muscle. "You can't help me without getting in trouble with the government."

"Hm?"

"Yeah, I'm not considered a person because of the Anti-Ecto Acts. Anything that uses or needs ectoplasum to survive is considered non-sentient and is to be turned over for experimentation and termination. And anyone caught helping us can be arrested for treason." Danny explains. "I barely escaped when I got caught. My godfather didn't. I hated him. He was mean, controlling, and creepy, but I didn't want him to die."

"I'm sorry."

"My problems are not your problems."

"I disagree." Danny blinks at her, his gaze sharpening when she starts moving her arm farthest from him. She moves slowly, reaching up and hooking her fingers under her mask.

"Wait!" Danny leans forward a hair as if he was about to physically grab her hand to stop her, but jerks himself back. He sounds small when he speaks again. "Are-are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Why??"

"Trust you."

"But WHY? You don't know me."

"I know enough." Is all she says before pulling her mask off. He slams his eyes shut and claps his hands over them for good measure.

"No, you don't!!" He hears her move, sitting up, before gentle hands pull his hands away.

"Yes, I do." She says sweetly. "Look."

Danny peeks at her. She has a bittersweet look on her face that brightens when she sees Danny looking. She's still gently holding his hands, loose enough he can pull away if he truly wants to.

"I'm not as young as I look." She tilts her head at the seemingly random comment. "I'm not actually 14. Not anymore. I'm stuck at when I died."

He hears her, and their eavesdroppers, gasp. It's the first time he's talked about it. But something tells him to tell her (them, if he's acknowledging the eavesdropping Bats).

"My parents were mad scientists that wouldn't be out of place in your rouges gallery." He stares at his and Black Bat's hands. "They were obsessed with ghosts and made a portal to the infinite realm, where "ghosts" live. They failed twice. Once in college, my godfather was hospitalized from the attempt, and the second time they failed, I accidentally turned it while being stupid with friends and died. They didn't notice, too happy their portal was suddenly working... That was 30 years ago."

There's a choking noise from the eavesdroppers.

"If I stay, you're going to be stuck with a freaky kid that doesn't age and can't be killed by the usual methods and has so much PTSD, like a ridiculous amount of PTSD. Are you sure you want to deal with that?"

"Yes." Black Bat doesn't even hesitate. Danny nearly gives himself whiplash from how quickly he looks up at her face. "Can't scare us away."

"It should. I don't even count as human."

"So?"

""So"???"

"Yes. Why should I care?"

"Why should-??? Why wouldn't you???"

"Kid." An unmasked Red Hood stands in the doorway. "This family is full of freaks and mental illness. You'll fit right in."

The statement strikes a nerve, overwhelming him, but Danny doesn't understand what's happening at first, why his lips are trembling, his face feels warm, and his eyes sting. He hasn't felt this sensation in years. But whatever look on his face makes the infamous Red Hood panic.

"Wait! Kid! Don't cry!"

It suddenly clicks with Danny. He's about to cry. But understanding what is happening, doesn't stop it from happening. Fat tears start sliding down his face.

"Dickie! What do I do?? I accidentally made him cry!! You're better wi-" Red Hood cuts himself off when Danny starts laughing. Laughing at how panicked a crimelord is at tears. Laughing at crying. Laughing at the whole absurd situation.

"It's okay." Black Bat says softly. Whether it's to Danny or the panicky Bat is lost to Danny. But no one says anything else til Danny's tears stop and laughter dies down.

"I was Phantom, ya know?" And he hears several people choke. After he was forcibly retired, this ghost half became known as "The First Hero" in a lot of circles. The GIW repressed the fact he was a ghost when people outside of Amity Park found out about the child hero, they didn't want the public angry with them for making him disappear. It didn't work, Tucker leaked everything he could find. Danny doesn't blame him for that. Tucker thinks he's completely dead since the GIW didn't want to admit they lost him and declared him to have Ended in those files. Danny hasn't told him he's "alive" either. Danny can't bring himself to drag Tucker back into the mess that is his life, can't bring himself to contact the man who has made something of his life, has a partner and kids, has mourned and moved on. He just can't do it. "But before I was Phantom, I was Danny Fenton. But now... I'm just Danny."

"Welcome to the family, Danny!" An unmasked Nightwing cheers.

"I thought Phantom had white hair?" Someone says just outside the room. Danny mischievously leans towards Black Bat.

"Close your eyes. This is going to be bright." He whispers. She smiles gamely and closes her eyes. He gets to hear the others yelp when he lets his transformation take over, essentially flashbanging everyone, but Black Bat.

"Wha..?"

"Hair white enough for you?" Danny says, grinning with too many teeth, that are a little too sharp. Black Bat pats the hand she's still holding.

"Pretty." She smiles delighted at him and he feels his face flush bright green.

"Oh! Um.. Thanks?" He takes a deep breath and realizes something. "Now you know my name, so who the hell are all of you?"

"You don't recognize us?"

"No. Am I supposed to?"

"Eh, most people do." Nightwing shrugs.

"Well, I haven't been able to keep up with much in the public zeitgeist. I just periodically check if it's still legal to kill me. Sadly, the answer is "yes" every time, so meh."

"We'll be taking care of that." Red Robin informs him while stepping into the room and frantically typing on a tablet. "I can't believe these stupid things still exist. The Green Lanterns and Justice League Dark are going to have the biggest fit when they see these. The rest of the JL will help dismantle these too. I'll personally get them to destroy these vile laws."

"Oh.. Thanks, I guess. It'll be nice to not be hunted anymore."

"I imagine."

"Okay! Introductions!" Nightwing gets them all back on topic. "I'm Dick Grayson! Batman is Bruce Wayne. Robin is Damian Wayne."

"Tim Drake."

"Cassandra Cain. But call me Cass."

"Jason Todd."

"Wait, wait, wait. I recognize your name! Didn't you- oh, wait, that's insensitive..."

"It's fine. I did, in fact, die, but I got better. We can start a club of undead. We can invite Spoiler. She technically died, too."

"Literally everyone here, besides me has died, Jason." Tim says, not looking away from the tablet.

"Yeah, but Steph is the only one I'd invite. She knows how to have fun."

"Little wing!" Dick whines.

"Timber can be an honorary member, since he's dead inside, a fun chaos gremlin, and ain't a narc."

"Thanks." Tim says dryly while Dick dramatically cries. Cass giggles.

And Danny? He's tired of running. He wants to be able to be the child he's stuck as while getting respect over his knowledge. He wants to be a vigilante and help people again. He wants to finally have a safe place to sleep.

So he decides to give these weirdos a chance.

[jeonginsleftcheek]

Can I see your d*ck? (pt 3)

pairing: lee felix x afab!reader

synopsis: your pretty best friend shows you some mercy...

wc: 1.6k

warnings: fingering, dirty talk, handjob, oral (m), cum swallowing

a/n: part 3! there might be a part 4...😉

masterlist

You were barely holding on, the last sane part of your mind slipping out just as Felix started teasing your entrance with three of his fingertips.

"F-Felix... Please." you whimpered and he smirked.

"I'm not sure you'll be able to take this." he pouted, teasing you and you were so close to just grabbing his wrist and making him shove his fingers inside you.

"I will, I promise!" you begged, feeling desperate as the embarrassment you felt earlier slowly started flying out the window.

"Hm..." Felix pretended to think, only pushing his fingertips in teasingly and you realized just how much three fingers are. You almost faltered when he smirked at you.

"Spread her for me." he whispered and you almost exploded right then and there as you put your fingers on either sides of your folds, spreading yourself for him.

"Pretty." he smirked and slowly pushed in, meeting some resistance even after you came and were still so wet. A whimper escaped your lips as you tried to relax, spreading your legs more. Felix could see and feel that you were struggling and he stopped midway.

"Does it hurt?" he asked and you could see the concern in his face, making your stomach flutter.

"No. It's just a little uncomfortable." you answered.

"I can stop if you want me to." he offered, his thumb brushing against your swollen, sensitive clit.

"No! Please don't stop!" you were determined to see this through, you were too far gone to back out now.

"Okay, sweetheart." Felix smirked at the way you clenched around him when he used the nickname, your pussy sucking his fingers in as he slowly filled you up.

"Oh, god." your eyes rolled back and you shut them tightly as your hands grabbed at the sheets below.

Felix bit on his lip as he observed you, his heart racing and his dick twitching in his pants. There was only so much teasing he too could take.

Playing with you without giving you what you actually wanted felt like he was edging himself too and it was becoming painful. His dick was straining against his pants so much that he felt as if they were going to burst open soon, he needed some kind of release. So, he used the fact that you were so gone in the feeling of his fingers fucking you slowly and he let his other hand travel down his body.

He gripped at himself, a low moan escaping his lips as he continued his pace, spreading you open with three fingers. Your eyes snapped open and you looked at him in a daze, your gaze traveling down until you stopped, watching him palm and grip himself through his pants.

"Fuck." you groaned. "Please let me see it! I can't wait anymore. Please."

"I think you should- ugh... Be patient." Felix tried to keep his composure but you could see he was slowly unraveling.

"I've been patient enough. I did what you said, three fingers. Come on, no more stalling." you stopped his wrist from moving and he whined, pulling his fingers out and cursing under his breath.

"I guess that a deal is a deal." Felix pulled his sweatpants down and you licked your lips in anticipation as you sat up, the throbbing feeling between your legs becoming almost unbearable.

He seemed to hesitate for a moment, his cheeks flushed as he looked down at himself before pulling his boxers down finally. You gasped, your legs pressing together instantly. You thought that it was the prettiest dick you've ever seen and all you wanted was to have him everywhere in you.

"See something you like sweetheart?" Felix smirked but you knew he was affected by the way you looked at him like you wanted to eat him up.

"Definitely." you said, feeling your body flush with waves of warmth.

"Better than your little porn videos?" he kept smirking and you returned it.

"I'll decide after I touch it." you whispered and leaned towards him.

"Don't get ahead of yourself, sweetheart." Felix grabbed your wrists gently. "Do you even know what you're doing?"

You knew he was teasing you, the slick bastard.

"I can learn." you freed your wrists from his hands and reached down to wrap your fingers around his length. Felix let out a low groan when he felt your touch, his eyes fluttering shut and eyebrows furrowing.

You bit on your lip as another wave of warmth went through your body, landing in your pussy. The way he felt in your hand, hot and heavy, his tip leaking in anticipation he felt for you only made you want more of him.

You knew he wanted to keep teasing you but his body betrayed him as he leaned into your hand, silently asking you to move. You spread the precum over his length and his eyes were still shut tightly as you started stroking him slowly.

It was almost like all of his resolve started melting with each stroke of your hand and when he opened his eyes and locked them on yours, you could feel him twitch in your hand.

"Am I doing good?" you whispered.

"Looking for praise?" he teased with a smirk.

"What if I am?" you teased back and he rolled his eyes playfully.

"You can go faster, sweetheart." his hand rested on the back of your head and gripped your hair as soon as you sped up. "Yeah, just like that baby. Keep going."

Felix leaned in and kissed you, his tongue swirling around yours as his hips started moving into your hand, matching the pace. You grabbed at his shoulder with your free hand as he knocked the breath out of your lungs.

You could feel him twitch again, leaking more precum as he got closer to the edge but you didn't wanna give him that satisfaction yet so you stopped all movement and removed your hand.

"W-why'd you stop?" Felix gasped, body arching towards you instictively.

"I wanna taste you."

The thought of your lips wrapped around his dick made Felix stutter for a moment as his hand gripped your hair harder.

"Are you sure?" he asked through gritted teeth, holding back from giving in as long as he could.

"I'm sure. Please."

Felix felt his body shiver and he got rid of his shirt before laying down on your bed and propping his hands behind his head, his eyes hazy and a cocky smile playing on his plump lips.

You chewed on your lip nervously before taking off your shirt too, throwing it aside and Felix's eyes darkened at the sight of your breasts.

"What are you waiting for, sweetheart?" he nudged your arm with his knee as you hovered closer to his dick.

"Nothing. Shut up." you felt a wave of embarrassment wash over you but you threw it in the back of your head as you leaned down closer, darting your tongue out to taste him.

"Fuck, sweetheart." Felix gasped instantly as you worked your tongue on his slit and the sensitive underside of his tip. "Put your lips around it." he instructed and you did as you were told, making his eyes roll back.

"Just like that, good girl." the praise went right to your pussy and you pressed your thighs together as you felt arousal drip between your legs.

You sucked on his tip before sliding down and taking more in slowly, driving Felix insane. He put his hand on your head, not gripping or forcing you, just guiding you and making sure you stay in place as he didn't let you lift off of him completely.

You rubbed your thighs together as you hollowed your cheeks and sucked on him, the feeling of him against your tongue, the salty taste, the way he held your head down; it was too much and you moaned around him, making him arch off the bed and slip in deeper. You gagged as his tip almost touched the back of your throat, your eyes filling up with tears.

"Fuck, sorry sweetheart." he bit on his lip and you moaned around him again to let him know you're okay. His fingers tightened in your hair just a little as you continued, speeding up and trying to find the limit of how much you could take, gagging a few times and it took everything in Felix not to snap and start fucking your face.

"K-keep going, baby. Faster." he stuttered, hips lifting into you. You could feel he was close by the way he kept twitching inside your mouth and you ignored the tears in your eyes, the uncomfortable gagging feeling and the way your jaw started hurting, you just wanted to make him feel as good as he did to you.

"Y-yes, oh god! I'm close." he tried to pull you off but you slapped his hand away and gripped the base of his dick, going even faster and deeper, as much as you could.

"S-shit!" Felix groaned and his hips snapped up into your mouth as he exploded inside, the warm liquid filling up your mouth and you panicked in that moment and quickly swallowed, sucking on him a little longer until he gave you everything.

"Did you just swallow?" Felix's eyes widened as you sat up and coughed a little.

"I did." you said breathlessly and he let out a chuckle of disbelief as he sat up too.

"You're crazy, baby." he chuckled and touched your cheek, noticing you were still pressing your legs together.

"Still feeling needy, sweetheart?" he teased with that smirk of his.

"Yes." you whispered, lips hovering closer to his.

"What are you needy for?"

"Your dick." you said and Felix laughed.

"I let you see it. And taste it. You're so greedy, baby."

"Yeah, I am. What are you gonna do about that?" you smirked, teasingly running your finger on his abs and chest.

"I guess I'll give you exactly what you need."

part 4

@moonchild9350 @janepg @velvetmoonlght @hwanghyunjinismybae @jehhskz @porangporangmeong @laylasbunbunny @laughatdanger @jeonginslefthand @sapphirewaves @s3ungm1nxxl0ve @painterhyunjin @moon-ttokki-x @saintcosette @ooshyana @frehyun @scarlet789 @skzdust @schniti-is-in-the-house @hwangjoanna @sona1800 @channiesrightasscheek @justwonder113 @yvettemint @inaribu00 @httpdwaekki @possum-playground @ria-april @yn-x-them @mariahxrrera @0omillo0 @halfwinterhalfuniverse @cooldeermagazine @delulkpopstan143 @todorokiskitten @compersian @azxulskz @stayp1eceposts @minniesverse @skzdreamer13 @0325ale @j-ji-jia @shannthewriter @mhluvie @my-neurodivergent-world @hyyunjinnn @spookybuttsstuff-blog @pancake-freckle @felixsbrowniesarmystayengene @minhooofr

[bakug0uzb1thc]

Part two of fem reader and bakugo cuddling pls (longer Version please)💗

eekkk i didnt think it would get so much attention here you go!!

PT 2 OF THIS !! :3

────────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──────────

“kat-" you tried to voice your complaints again, but it was short-lived by the same sleepy blonde telling you to 'shut up.’ He just wasn't letting up and you just knew someone saw.

"but- i just know someone saw us, oh were gonna be so screwed." you said franticly playing with his hair, only causing him to groan. "you're so paranoid, stop focusing on other people for once..." he mumbled from where he laid on your chest.

he could hear the way your heart rate increase, only further proving your concern with the position you laid with him. He was flush against your body with his weight slowly suffocating you.

"I'm sorry its just ugh.. never mind." you tried to calm yourself down from your cloud of worry but it didn't stop your nerves from being on edge.

your face felt hot with his attitude towards the situation you had found yourself in. how nonchalant he was being about this made you squirm, did he not care at all? (he didn't.)

he knew you weren't huge on PDA and you liked to keep your close relationship private but it was messing with his beauty sleep and his temper grew even shorter then when he was fully awake.

he got up, which made you calm down a bit but before you could let out your sigh of relief he grabbed your waist and threw you over his shoulder causing you to squeal.

You weren't sure what would cause your classmates to freak out more; The two of you cuddling or you thrown over his shoulder with a hand full of your ass.

"ah- kat what are you-" you held on tight to his compression shirt from the back, scared of being upside down and the possibility he might drop you if you complained about his actions. "I'm tired and I'm sick of your whining. you need to learn to shut up." he fought a yawn as his hand trailed from the dent behind your knee to your lower ass, not anything sexual it was just where he found his hand resting.

"uh-" you didn't know what to tell him or throw back to defend yourself, you just held on tight curious on which room he was headed to.

"yer lucky you're getting your way." he scoffed making his way to his room, not feeling the hassle of accidentally bumping into anyone on your floor. it took him about 2.5 seconds to put you in the same position you were in on the commons couch.

he loved the soft cushion of your chest, built in pillows for all his tired mind could think as far of. "now are you gonna be quiet or am i going to have to smother you with a pillow, brat." he was unique in the way he shows his love towards you, you knew his words had no ill intent behind them but it did make you giggle from his groggy state.

"nono I'm done i swear." you smiled, pushing your head deeper into the pillow that felt like was pre-fluffed just for you. (it was.) "good." he mumbled before closing his eyes and resuming what you had so rudely interrupted. "you're so needy.." you whispered, thinking he was asleep.

"i will suffocate you don't try your luck." he countered which made you laugh before kissing the top of his head. You loved your 'best friend.' ;p

[toruro]

— ✧ guilty as sin

pairing: mingyu x reader

genre: smut (18+ / mdni), non-idol au, open ending ... (pt 2 perhaps?)

word count: 8k

description: the thought crosses your mind that this is something you definitely shouldn't be doing. that what you're just about to do will be a terribly wrong move for you and your freshly broken heart.

warnings: alcohol & (mentions of) marijuana consumption

tags: mingyu and reader went to same high school, y/n and mingyu both are freshly out of relationships, blowjobs, sex, dirty talk, idk they banter a lot i think theyre cute so believe me

a/n: so this is a fun little piece ... i do have a plot outline for a part 2 and 3 but totally depends on if u guys want to see more of them ... anyways i know i have been mia with my writing but i really like this piece so i hope u all enjoy >_< tysm to the lovely @gyuswhore who beta read this for me bc everyone knows i don't proofread anything

“He’s single.”

You ignore Nayeon’s statement, pretending to scroll through a cafe’s website on your phone.

“He’s single,” she repeated, clearing her throat for a moment before. She’s unsure if you heard her.

Still no response. You try bopping your head to music, hoping Nayeon will think you’re extremely engrossed in the faint music from the radio.

She doesn’t.

“Mingyu’s single, damnit!” Nayeon yells out this time, and you obviously are caught off guard by the way you nearly jump out of your seat.

You crane your neck at her and frown. “I know Mingyu’s single! I know he’s single, Nayeon, but that doesn’t explain why he never replied to my message!” you cry out, throwing your hands in the air. “If anything, this makes things worse—that means he’s available and plain doesn’t want anything to do with me.”

Nayeon shakes her head at you, turning her eyes back to the road. “That’s not true. I heard he only broke up with his ex recently. Maybe he’s just taking a break from … well, you know: other girls. I think that’s fair.” You don’t say anything, but you know she’s right. “And I think …” Nayeon follows, while you mentally prepare for what you know she’ll say, “I think you should learn to do that too.”

“Nayeon!” you whine.

“What? You also just broke up with Taehyun—there should be a waiting period, don’t you think? At least like—four months.”

“Four months?!” you screech. It’s a passing thought that she’s right. Deep down, you know that space is just what you need—a vacation from boys—all of them.

“Yes, four months. Seriously, do you think you’re even emotionally over Taehyun?”

You frown at her question, because you both know the answer to that. For god’s sake, you’d called her crying over how you fucked up by breaking up with him. “I mean—”

“You know, I don’t even think four months would be long enough for you. You’re so far gone, I think you might need at least a year before you can emotionally commit to someone.”

“Wow,” you say dryly. “Didn’t know you knew me better than myself.”

Nayeon smirks at you. “I mean, I think we both know that’s true.”

You huff, crossing your arms over your shoulder, looking at the window. Even with her rather annoying (albeit correct) analysis of your feelings, you’re grateful for her emotional support, and her offer to pick you up from the airport.

“How have you and Cheol been,” you ask her a few moments later, hopefully diverting the conversation. Nayeon huffs at your persistence on not talking about this, but she finally lets up.

“We’ve been good. Long distance has been easier than we expected,” she replies honestly.

“That’s good, I’m glad,” you say, trying to ignore the way your heart pangs just a little. It’s unfortunate that you and Taehyun weren’t so lucky. You two lasted ten months of long distance before things began to crumble.

You push the thought of you and Taehyun to the back of your mind. Just even hearing his name is enough for your stomach to turning into ugly knots, memories flooding back to you about just how badly you fucked up.

You try to remind yourself that mistakes happen to be learned from.

You can only hope that you don’t let anything like that happen again. Ever again.

It’s the next night when Nayeon climbs into your car as you park out in front of her place. “Coming home for break never really gets old, huh,” she says, buckling up over her lacy top.

“Cute top,” you compliment as you pull out of her driveway and make your way back onto the road.

“Thanks. Cheol got it for me,” she replies with a grin. “You ready for the night?” she asks with a slightly sarcastic laugh.

“Rhetorical question?” you shoot back with a raised brow. “Honestly, I’m not sure. It might be nice to see everyone together again, but also I’m glad that we left a lot of those people in the past.”

“Ooh, what do you mean by that?” Nayeon coos, and you both laugh together.

“As if you don’t know what I mean. I can’t imagine you’re exactly looking forward to seeing Renjun again.”

Nayeon grimaces deeply when you say that. “Why would you say that?” she whines. “Just had to go and remind me about him …”

“Nayeon, I love you but I’m not apologizing because you’re literally going to see him in ten minutes.”

“Whatever. Anyways, I know I told you to take time away from guys, but you’ve been pretty mopey about this whole thing with Taehyun and—”

“Hey! You said it was okay if I talked about him.”

“Before you rudely cut me off,” Nayeon snaps, “I was going to say that it’s okay to be upset about him. I just think maybe it’s also okay to let him out of your system, y’know? Deep clean sorta thing.”

You cock an eyebrow at her. “And how do you suggest I do that?”

“Well I was getting to that! You know who’s going to be there tonight?” she says excitedly.

“Oh let me guess,” you say flatly, pausing for an intentional five seconds before deadpanning, “oh my gosh, Mingyu?”

“Yeah! Come on, be more excited about it!” Nayeon cheers you on.

You sigh dramatically. “You know, I would be a lot more excited about seeing him if he didn’t air me when I messaged him a month ago.” You physically cringe whenever the image of your lone message in the chat with Mingyu pops into your head.

are you going to be home for the break?

He never responded, casually on brand for Mingyu and his nonchalance.

“The others haven’t talked to him since high school right?” you confirm with Nayeon. “None of you guys were really friends with him, if I remember correctly.”

“Yeah, I mean all of them don’t like him,” Nayeon says, referring to her other group of friends. You furrow your eyebrows.

“I guess he was kinda mean in high school …” you reply with a sigh. It’s true. Mingyu was kinda mean. Nayeon gives you a questionable look.

“No—well yeah—but they all don’t like him because they liked him and he didn’t give a shit. Hell, even I thought Mingyu was cute, but he would like never do anything with any of us.”

You purse your lips. You didn’t know that. “Oh really,” you say dryly.

“Yeah,” Nayeon says with a half laugh, and then shoots you a smirk. “That’s kinda why at the beginning of senior year Seoyeon was kinda, well, you know—”

“Bitchy,” you finished off for her. “I guess it makes sense,” you continue with a little sparkle in your eyes. You feel a wave of giddiness wash over you as you let yourself smile when you say, “I mean, I did get to kiss him.”

When you were with Taehyun, you always tried to avoid thinking about what happened that one night in senior year. Drunk for the first time ever, sharing a few puffs of weed with Mingyu, and there you and him were, cuddling on Nayeon’s friend’s couch in the living room in front of all of your friends. And then eventually the couch turned into a bed, and you weren’t surrounded by your friends, you were surrounded by four walls and a locked door, and of course you weren’t cuddling—damn it—you were on Mingyu’s lap and kissing him.

But of course, it was no perfect evening, because then the ruckus that follows 10 shots of alcohol began to crawl up your throat, and Nayeon was banging on the door (god, who’s room even was this?); so you flung yourself out of the room and hurled into the toilet across the hall.

That’s all you remember from the night, but unfortunately your friends reminded you of your rather poor alcohol decisions when you were sober the next morning.

“You kissed Mingyu!” they had said. “That’s fucking crazy. Didn’t you like him like two years ago?”

You had grimaced at them. Shrugged, trying to act like that wasn’t all that was running through your head because yeah, you did like Mingyu two years ago and it might’ve been a silly little hallway crush but god, if he didn’t have your stomach doing twists and turns for no damn reason and—

Eyes on the road, you remind yourself when you feel like you’re getting too caught up in your thoughts. Clearing your mind as you near the parking lot of the bar, you and Nayeon chat up on the latest gossip about all the people you’re about to see.

Soon, you make it into the bar, and you’re met with a myriad of familiar faces. They greet you with polite small talk and it’s a little bit funny. You have seen these people at quite possibly the most embarrassing era of their lives; and they had seen you at yours. It’s funny how you now exchange awkward smiles and unfamiliar handshakes with these same people.

You say hi to them slowly, one by one, checking them off in your head. Renjun … Joshua … Wonwoo … Seungkwan … Soonyoung … and the list goes on. Silently, you brace yourself for the last person of the lot.

Everyone’s conversing among themselves, so you’re confident that no one’s going to watch the horribly awkward interaction you and Mingyu have when your eyes meet as you approach him. You both might have agreed to pretend nothing ever happened between you two, but there’s something uneasy in the air right now. You haven’t seen each other in over a year.

You’ve been watching him from the corner of your vision. He’s got on a black button up, casually unbuttoned, shiny watch glinting against the dim bar lights, dark wash jeans that make his butt look really nice and—

God, you need to stop getting so ahead of yourself. You find yourself almost faltering in your step, getting caught up in your thoughts when you approach him.

“Hi,” you say to Mingyu once you finally find yourself in front of him. You try and distract yourself from the way heat is rushing to your face as you remember that he’s probably read the message you sent him, but you hope he won’t bring it up.

“Long time no see,” Mingyu responds with a smile you can’t quite read. You two stand in a bit of an awkward silence before you get the feeling that you don’t really want to be in this situation anymore. You clear your throat and straighten your back upon the realization.

“Well,” you say, letting your eyes wander elsewhere in the bar. “It was nice seeing you. I’m gonna just—” you point at Nayeon with a few of your other friends by the barstools, “—get going, you know, and—” you almost find yourself rambling before you choose to shut yourself up and walk away.

As you’re turning away, you hear Mingyu call your name for god knows what reason.

“We should catch up,” he says casually.

There it is. That’s it.

You turn back to him for just a moment, flashing a smile and a nod, before going back to spend some time with your other friends.

It’s about an hour and a half later, and you and your girl friends are past the pleasantries and now knee-deep into sharing the raunchy details of the past few semesters at college.

At some point, the drinks everyone had gotten at the beginning seemed to be running dry, so Seoyeon says, “Hey ladies, anyone ready for another few rounds of drinks, or—”

“Or even better!” Sakura squeals. “Shots! Who wants shots?!”

All of your friends cheer, and you smile along with them. “You guys go ahead,” you tell them when they start picking their stuff from where you’re seated to the bar area. “I’m driving tonight, so I’ll pass,” you explain, patting Nayeon on the shoulder.

She hugs you from the side, murmuring, “Ugh, you’re the best,” before joining the others as they head for their new round of drinks—or shots, was it—or maybe both—who knows? As they start walking away, you see a tall figure walking toward you, and once you recognize just who it’s about to be, your stomach does a flip.

“Hey,” Mingyu greets you once again, after the others all leave, and you’re scared to look him in the eye. You can see it from the corner of your vision: that gleam in his eyes. It’s mischievous, almost, but mixed with something else you can’t quite figure out.

He’s an enigma, you remind yourself again, and you don’t think you’ll ever quite figure him out.

“Hey,” you say softly, unsure what to follow with. You grip your mocktail from earlier a little tighter, using your other hand to stir it round with the thin straw.

“So, how’ve you been?” Mingyu asks you with a smile, raising both his eyebrows in a way that almost makes you want to call him cute. He leans against a wall beside you both, and gosh—it’s sexy too, and it’s driving you ‘cause he’s cute and he’s sexy at the same damn time, and you just can’t wrap your mi—

The question. You need to answer his question.

“I’ve been … alright,” you tell him, finally lifting your gaze to look up at his eyes. They’re staring right back at you, and you may not be under the influence, but you’re definitely under his. “Pretty good, recently actually,” you decide to add, some rush of excitement flooding over you. “You?”

Mingyu smiles at your near chirpiness, still holding eye contact. “Guess I could say the same. I’ve been better,” he says, and you both chuckle. “But I’ve been doing good, especially back here at home,” he says.

“Yeah,” you agree, “Something about this place, huh?”

“Something about this place …” Mingyu repeats, “Yeah. Well that’s fuckin’ true. It makes me feel a certain way.”

“Brings back the memories for me,” you say.

“The good?” Mingyu asks with a bit of an open-mouthed smile. “Or the bad?”

You look up at the ceiling, holding a finger to your chin while pretending to think intensely. “Both!” you conclude after a few seconds. Mingyu lets out a small laugh at your display, and then you find yourself thinking about that stupid four letter word. Cute.

“Cheers to that,” he chuckles, holding his bottle of beer up to you. You hold your mocktail glass up as well, clicking the glass with Mingyu and smiling together.

“Hey,” he continues, “can I get you another drink? Not sure how long you’ve been holding onto that one, but it seems like it’s no good now anyways.”

“Oh, no, no, no! I’m not drinking tonight—gotta get Nayeon and myself home safely. This is so I still look like I’m having a drink. Mocktail,” you tell him.

“Oh really? That’s funny. I never took you as a DD kinda girl—I’m much more familiar with the version of you that … well, you know.”

Yeah, yeah you did fucking know.

“What can I say, I’m a changed woman,” you claim coolly, aiming to act unbothered by what he just brought up. You take this as your chance to lean into him a little closer, holding your drink up to his nose. “What? Don’t believe me? Smell it.”

This time, Mingyu leans in even closer to you, hardly a foot of space between you two. You can only hope no one sees you two like this. Luckily for you and Mingyu, everyone seems to be a bit preoccupied with their own shenanigans elsewhere.

“Guess I believe you,” he finally concludes, lifting his head back up and settling back in his previous position. “So how’s school? Heard you’re running with that—what is it—math degree?”

“Yeah,” you reply with a smile. The thought of Mingyu hearing about you and remembering the details has you feeling some kind of way. “Got a few more courses left and then I can graduate! I’m assuming the same for you—only two more semesters, yeah?”

“Yeah, pretty much. I might go abroad this next semester actually,” he tells you.

“Oh really. Where’re you headed?”

“Spain, hopefully. Still waiting to see if I’ll be able to graduate on time if I go.”

“Wow,” you say in a breath. The image of Mingyu walking the roads of Spain under the sun, his tan skin glowing from the— “Wow, yeah. Spain is really cool. I’ve never been.”

“You should stop by,” Mingyu says with a shrug, almost too casually. You narrow your eyebrows at him.

Just as you’re about to respond, Nayeon drapes herself over you from behind, a little more than tipsy to add. You’re a bit startled, eyes wide and facing Mingyu as you both take a few steps, backing away from each other.

“Hey,” Nayeon greets with a faint slur, pointing a lazy finger at Mingyu. “This,” she says exaggeratedly, this time moving her finger to point at you, “is my lovely DD for the night, so I’d appreciate it if you don’t take her out for a puff.”

Mingyu gives her a flat look. “Wasn’t planning on it,” he says dryly, clearly bothered by Nayeon’s interruption.

Nayeon shrugs and you’re a little bit confused as to why she’s suddenly acting with this edge of hostility towards Mingyu. (Last you checked, their families were friends, and Nayeon was one of the only girls here who didn’t truly dislike him.)

“Wouldn’t count on it, you know, given what happened the last time,” Nayeon bites back, and this time you’re the one to be slightly irritated.

You shrug her off your back, saying, “Nayeon, don’t worry, I’m not gonna smoke or anything—trust me.” You think thoughtfully, glancing between her and Mingyu who has an indecipherable look on his face, and then you add, “And Mingyu wouldn’t anyways. I already told him I’m driving home. Why don’t you go hang out with Sakura? Looks like she’s calling you over.”

“Really?” Nayeon squeals, and just as quickly as she showed up, she’s gone again.

You chuckle as she hurries off, turning back to Mingyu. “Sorry about that,” you tell him sheepishly when you catch the way his lips are pursed tightly.

“Your friends will never let that up, huh?” he says, and you think he almost sounds annoyed as he takes a sip of his drink.

You raise a brow. “Have your friends let it up? Probably not, huh?” you bite back, a little mischievously. You’re both teetering around the topic—not exactly talking about what happened that night years ago, but at the same time, you’re both definitely talking about just exactly that.

Mingyu chuckles. “Touche.”

You’re unsure of what to say next. You can’t quite tell where this conversation is headed—if it’ll lead you to another dead end—another few years of shoving your lust for Mingyu to the back of your mind before he pops up again and makes you start all over again. There’s always going to be a little spark though, kindling somewhere inside you, ready to plunge yourself into this man you hardly know.

“Senior year was kinda crazy, wasn’t it?” you say with a sly smile.

When Mingyu mirrors the look on your face, you swear you feel the spark turn into a small flame. “Yeah, you could put it like that.”

You’re surely not intoxicated, but when you sense him shuffling a little closer to you, running his hands through his thick dark hair, a wave of boldness courses through you. “Do you miss it?” you ask, almost innocently, with your big pretty eyes staring up at him.

Mingyu smirks. “I probably should say no … but that would be lying. And I am no longer a liar.”

“Oh, has the Kim Mingyu retired from his title of pathological liar?”

Mingyu laughs this time, and it’s hearty. “I have, but just for tonight.”

“Does that mean I’m never going to see this truthful, honest version of yourself again?” you whine with a fake pout. You’re treading unfamiliar waters here, but you can’t remember the last time you had this much fun single.

Mingyu gives you a warning look, but then smiles. He opens his mouth, ready to respond, when Joshua calls out his name.

“Yo Mingyu! Check this out!” he yells from across the bar.

“Give me a second,” Mingyu calls back, but just as he’s about to turn back to you, Wonwoo speaks up.

“Nah Mingyu, you gotta come over now. Soonyoung’s doing this weird ass thing and—hurry up! He’s not gonna do it again and—” You hear a series of unintelligible shouts come from that area, and Mingyu gives an apologetic look before tending to his friends.

There’s something in his eyes that told you, this isn’t finished yet, but before you know it your friends scoop you up from the table area and pull you over to where they’re playing pool. Soon, any hopes you had of talking to Mingyu again were slim to none, both of you two involved with whatever your friends were doing, but also conscious about how it would look if you guys talked alone for any longer.

You can’t handle the speculation.

You’re pretty confident Mingyu wouldn’t be a fan either.

Later that night, you drop Nayeon off at her house, and then make your way back to your own home. After doing your nightly routine, you slip into the soft covers of your bed when you hear a soft buzz come from your phone.

You’re not exactly sure who’d be texting you at this hour, but as you reach for your device, something in your stomach just knows.

You’re smiling before you even tap your screen.

You’re grinning by the time you see the name pop up brightly.

mingyu: my fault for not responding earlier mingyu: so boba tomorrow at 8?

“Can’t remember the last time I had boba past 6 pm, to be honest. Weird choice,” you remark, tapping on the kiosk to adjust your order to your liking.

“You gonna be sassy about every decision I make?” Mingyu huffs, standing right by you in the empty little boba shop. You hum, as you continue to finalize your order.

“Mm, that depends.”

“On?”

“On what kinda decisions you make.”

Mingyu scoffs. “You’re impossible.”

“Yeah, that’s kinda my thing, you know?” you reply cheekily, clicking on the ‘Ready to Pay’ option on the screen. Just as you’re about to pull out your card, a firm hand is on your shoulder. You look up at Mingyu as he gently pushes you to the side and replaces your spot in front of the kiosk.

You don’t say anything as he punches in his own order, pulls out his credit card, and pays for both of your drinks. As the machine outputs the receipt, you show him a small smile. “Thanks. You didn’t have to.”

Mingyu gives you a look. “Yeah, I did.” There’s a bit of an awkward silence. Mingyu paying for your drink isn’t too weird—your guy friends in college buy you food all the time! Albeit you do occasionally return the favor, it never feels anything more than platonic.

So why does it give you butterflies when Mingyu so casually puts you under his tab?

You choose not to care. You’re not expecting anything out of this, after all. This is just for all good fun—reminiscing, if you wanted to put it like that.

“What’d you get?” you ask him, breaking the silence, as you peer over his arm to glance at the receipt. The action has your cheek brushing against his shoulder, and something tells you the both of you are thinking about it just as much as the other.

“Passionfruit green tea,” he says, holding the receipt closer to you so you can read it more clearly.

“Mmm, yummy,” you say gleefully, giving Mingyu a cheeky smile.

“Hey,” he scoffs. “I didn’t say I’d let you try my drink! Don’t get ahead of yourself now,” he teases.

You pout and furrow your eyebrows. “What the hell, Mingyu? Why not?” you cry out overdramatically. “Oh come on, I was gonna share my toffee caramel tea with you!”

Mingyu rolls his eyes playfully. “I don’t like toffee.”

“I didn’t know that! I would have ordered something else then.”

“Too bad you didn’t,” Mingyu replies with a carefree shrug.

You glare at him, stomach fluttering with something youthful—you’re having fun with Mingyu. “That’s not fair!” you whine.

“Must suck,” he says indifferently, watching you cross your arms over your chest from the corner of his vision. Something sparks inside Mingyu in the moment, watching you look up at him through your thick lashes. “Maybe I can give you a sip or two …”

Your eyes glow. “Really?”

Mingyu grins. “Yeah, but you’re going to have to repay me.”

Your eyes meet, and there’s something electric in the way you look at each other. The thought crosses your mind that this is something you definitely shouldn’t be doing. That what you're just about to do will be a terribly wrong move for you and your freshly broken heart.

But Mingyu’s eyes are glimmering, and there’s something in your stomach that is yelling at you to stop thinking so damn much and slam on the accelerator. You beam up at him with a challenging gaze.

“How do you want me to do that?”

An hour later you’re in Mingyu’s room, stumbling through his door with your hands already all over each other. His lips are soft against yours, peppering short but hot kisses all over you, your face, your neck and—god, fuck, how does he know about that one spot on your neck?

“Ah, Mingyu,” you moan quietly when his hands palm at your hip, fingers sliding under your shirt and brushing over your skin. His hands are warm, but still you shiver at the touch—just knowing it’s Mingyu and you, alone in this moment, is enough to have your eyes rolling to the back of your head.

Well, that, and the way he’s got his tongue tracing over your collarbone. He’s too good at this, you think to yourself for a moment, before getting lost in the feeling. Soon, he brings his lips back to yours, and you kiss fervently as you stumble backwards into his bed.

With the back of your knees hitting the mattress, you both go tumbling onto the sheets, and suddenly everything feels all too familiar. Mingyu’s hands in your hair. Your lips glossy and swollen as you start to press kisses into his neck. The growing heat between the two of you.

You and Mingyu twist around in the sheets for a blissful moment, clothes and hair going awry as your limbs intertwine in this hot, messy mess of a hook-up. At some point, Mingyu ends up underneath you, back propped up against the mattress so that he’s sitting up straight, your legs straddling him as you nestle in his lap.

With your hands all over each other, he’s got his grip on your hips, pushing them up and forward in a curved motion that has you grinding against him. “Fuck,” you whimper when you feel his painfully hard length brush against your throbbing heat.

Your tummy tumbles at the prospects of what’s to come. Pulling back from Mingyu’s hot lips, you get to see him in a way you never thought you’d get to again—cheeks flushed, eyes fluttered shutted, and swollen lips partially open and panting for breath. His dark wisps of hair come down over his forehead, sticking to the thin layer of sweat that coats his tan skin.

Slowly Mingyu begins to open high eyes, laughing lightly. The sound makes you want to grin into eternity. Gently, he cups your face and pulls you in for a kiss, this one much softer, much lighter than the ones before.

Mingyu kisses you with what—dare you say it—care. He kisses you with care, he holds your chin as if it were made of glass, he brushes his tongue against yours in a way that tells you he wouldn’t want to be anywhere else but here and—

The thoughts have you reeling. Has being sexless for the past few months made you this vulnerable? you think to yourself in a passing moment; has the lack of male physical contact been this detrimental to your ability to have sex without feelings?

The moment passes, and you choose to push your thoughts to the back of your mind, pushing your lips harder into Mingyu’s to fuel a more fiery, more aggressive kiss. He groans into it, and the burning heat you feel every time you grind down on it makes it impossible for you to wait longer.

Slowly, you pull away from him and scoot down the bed between his legs. For a moment, Mingyu is still in a daze, eyes half open as he still imagines the feeling of his lips on yours. You inch down further, bringing your hands closer and closer to the waistband of his jeans.

Right as your fingers brush over the little bit of skin that peeks between his shirt and his belt, Mingyu lets out a soft gasp. Looking up at him, you’re met with the sight of his blown out eyes as he reaches down to hold your face again.

“I-I know I said you gotta repay me, but you know, you don’t really have to—not like this at least. I mean you can, but not if you don—” Mingyu rambles for a moment, and you almost want to use that god-forsaken word. Cute.

“Hey,” you say quietly, pressing your index finger to his lip. “Lemme do this—I want to.” You feel him relax under you, the finger that was on his lips slowly tracing down his jaw and then his neck, inching to his collar and—

Oh, he’s already gotten started on unbuttoning his shirt. You almost forget to get back at it, with the way you’re staring him down right now. Mingyu chuckles a little, watching the way your eyes dilate as you gaze over him.

“Like what you see?” He says it in a way like he knows what he’s doing to you. Like he knows you’ve got a puddle between the crest of your thighs.

You’re not shameful enough to stop yourself from grinning and nodding, “I do.”

Mingyu’s eyes flame with that hunger you’ve seen before. He likes the way you’re doing this. “You’re the fuckin’ devil aren’t you?” he coos, as you start to unbuckle his belt, pulling down the waistband of his pants. He lifts his hips as you pull them further down, patiently waiting for your response.

“The devil … you must think red suits me then,” you say it like a question. The way you smile tells Mingyu you’ve got something hidden up your sleeve. While he shrugs off his unbuttoned shirt, you sit nestled between his legs still fully clothed.

Mingyu watches you as you tug at the hem of your shirt before gently pulling it over your head, revealing a deep red lacy bra underneath.

“Speak of the devil herself,” Mingyu breathes out with a small smile, continuing to watch as you shimmy off your bottoms and reveal matching red panties. You admit: it’s doing a lot for a first boba date, but you can’t help but think it fits the scene perfectly.

Mingyu leans forward, pressing kissing on the bare skin of your chest as you play with the waistband of his briefs before finally pushing them down to reveal his length. Looking down, it’s long and it’s pretty and it’s thick, with veins pushing up against the sides.

With a soft gasp, you pull away from Mingyu and slowly settle yourself lower in the bed so that you’re laying stomach side down right in between his legs. Mingyu watches you from his view above; he watches the ways your eyes slowly gaze over his dick, fingers inching toward it before finally wrapping around the base.

He nearly gasps when you do—and Kim Mingyu is no virgin—but something about the warmth in your fingertips and the softness in your touch has him feeling electric. So when you bring your tongue to his shiny tip and lap, he straight up moans.

The sound alone has you opening your mouth wider, taking him fully into your mouth and down. Immediately, Mingyu’s hands shoot to your head, scooping up bundles of your hair and holding it behind your head. Slowly, you find yourself in a pattern of moving your head up and down, except there’s just one problem.

Mingyu is far too big and he’s far too gentle—you can’t fit enough of him in your mouth and he’s not exactly pushing you down so you think it’s time to take some action.

So as gently as you can, you begin to hollow out your cheeks and push yourself further down his length, eyes shutting when he hits the back of your throat. At once, you hear a loud groan and if you could move your lips right now, you’d be grinning.

And so you do it again. You pull your head back up and just as your lips are about to leave his tip you come back down and push as far as you can go, each time going a bit further down than the last. You do it a few more times before your jaw begins to ache for a break, and you pull yourself off of him completely.

You’re met with Mingyu’s dazed eyes as you look up. “You’re crazy,” he pants, fingers still tangled in your hair. “Holy fuck, you’re crazy.”

You grin up at him. “Sorry,” you say cheekily, watching as he throws his head back, taking deep breaths of air. His firm chest rises up and down heavily, and the heat between your legs grows at the realization that you’re the one to have him like this.

“Don’t apologize—shit—that was so—d-do that again,” he says, eyes darkening when he looks back down at you. His hands gingerly wipe some tears from your cheeks, going back up to hold your hair all the way back again. “That was so fucking hot.”

Your stomach churns as you part your lips again, wrapping them around his tip which now adorns a pretty stream of pre. He groans again when you envelop him in your mouth, hollowing out your cheeks as you start to move down again.

To be honest, you’re not usually this good at giving head, but with Mingyu, he’s got this—oh, there it is—the way your name rolls of his lips in a deep, guttural tone that has you gushing in your panties, and then you can’t help but press down more.

So you do it again, and again, until Mingyu’s practically thrusting his hips up as you take him into your mouth, his handsome face glistening with sweat from restraining himself. You don’t know how much time goes by but at some point you feel a tug; you look up and it’s Mingyu’s hands guiding your head off of him and pulling you into his mouth.

He kisses you messily, tongues licking into each others’ mouths as you shift so that you’re back at straddling him. With Mingyu fully naked, your bare stomach presses against his skin when his arms wrap around your waist, pulling you close.

Instinctively, your arms wrap around Mingyu’s neck as you continue to kiss into him, bodies melting into one. You ease back to your previous movement of grinding into him, but with such little fabric between the two of you this time, it’s getting harder and harder to wait.

It doesn’t take long for his hand to make its way to your panties, rubbing your heat over the soaked fabric for a moment before lifting it and pushing it to the side.

Mingyu pulls away now, watching your face slowly contort into expressions of pleasure as he runs his fingers up and down between your sopping hole and clit.

“Mingyu,” you manage to whimper through heavy breaths.

“Yeah baby?” The nickname itself nearly has your eyes rolling to the back of your head. He probably doesn’t have a clue about what he does to you.

“Can’t wait,” you tell him quickly, hands already grabbing for his glistening length. Mingyu, a little startled by your forwardness, falters back into the headboard a bit, relaxing for hardly a second before he feels your fingers guiding his dick toward your hole.

He thought he’d sit there and finger you first—give you a good eating out because if anything, Mingyu’s always really wanted a taste of you first—but something about the way you look at him with these eyes that look like you’d give him the world and more has him bending to your needy wishes/

So, when his tip is finally at your entrance, you both moan loudly. Your fingers make your way up to Mingyu’s neck, playing with the soft and short hairs that sit at the nape of his neck. “Oh,” you say in a sigh when his hips gently push you down to envelope his tip.

Even having him in your mouth couldn’t prepare you for taking Mingyu’s length inside of you. His tip, thick and bulbous, presses into you, and inch by inch you begin to let out small gasps.

“You’re—holy shit, you’re so big, M’ngyu,” you whimper.

You say it so cutely, Mingyu can’t help but groan under his breath. “Yeah?” he manages out, trying to hide the extent to which you’ve got him in a daze. “Can’t take it?” he coos.

Mingyu is, at the very least, extremely pleased when you—you, in your lustful, hazy state—still manage to cock an eyebrow at him and retort, “Of course I can.”

“Atta girl,” Mingyu murmurs, smiling with pride as he reaches for hips. Lowering your body over his dick, he watches you carefully while you continue to take him all in.

The way your chest heaves up and down in short breaths as you try to control yourself. The way your eyebrows pinch together every few seconds when you let out a small moan. The way your stomach twitches and turns when he brushes a finger over your clit.

You’re beautiful. You’re so beautiful to Mingyu, he doesn’t think anyone can comprehend all the ways he wants to fuck you right now. Well, that is, anyone but you, because as soon as your bottom is pressed against Mingyu’s legs and you’ve gone as far down as you can go, you bring yourself back up and grind back down on his dick.

“Fuck, do that again,” Mingyu demands, but it comes out as nothing more than a pleading gasp as you both get used to the feeling of each other—it’s overwhelming, yet in the best way possible. “You’re so damn hot,” he murmurs when you repeat the motion, pressing wet kisses into your neck.

Each roll of your hips is punctuated with a quiet moan from your lips, the two of your lips meeting every few moments in a fiery but fleeting kiss. Mingyu fills you up so deeply, in a way that leaves you wanting more and more.

Your body is on fire and you can’t seem to stop now. It’s just—Mingyu’s got his dick pressing all the spots inside of you that have you biting down on your bottom lip, that have you digging your fingers into the hard muscle of his shoulder, that have you moaning into his mouth.

But even your own body has limits, because while the feeling of you bouncing back down on his length every time is nothing short of euphoric, your legs only have so much strength. Gradually, your legs begin to get sore.

Within seconds Mingyu notices the falter in your movements, and suddenly his hands are under your thighs, picking you up, and flipping you onto your back. Your back is now against the mattress, head resting on a soft pillow as Mingyu readjusts above you.

“Getting tired?” Mingyu chuckles, as he reaches down for his dick, aligning it at your entrance once more. A needy whine escapes your throat when he finally is inside of you again, his length filling up what felt far too empty in those passing moments before.

“Didn’t—ah! D-Didn’t take you as the type to make the girl do a-all the work,” you bite back.

Mingyu cocks his eyebrow at you, and you almost want to grin at the way his eyes darken at your challenging comment. “You got a bad bad mouth, huh? Let’s see if you can talk much anymore soon.” You open your mouth to respond, but at the last moment, Mingyu pushes that last bit of his length inside of you, effectively rendering you speechless as you see stars and try to quiet the rush in your ears. Mingyu just laughs. “Didn’t think so.”

He pauses for a few seconds inside of you, and you take this chance to admire him in a way you didn’t get to before. His skin is flushed all over, pink blooming over his cheeks as he swipes a tongue over his lips. As your gaze travels down, you catch sight of his abs once again, and you can’t help but grin at just the idea of getting to see him like this.

Now, Mingyu starts out with his first thrust. It’s deep, and unforgiving might you add. You shriek loudly, not expecting to fill you up even more than before, yet somehow it’s both equally overwhelming and infinitely more euphoric.

Based on the volume of your response to the first, he follows with another thrust, this one nearly as moving. Your responses mimic the last, and soon, Mingyu enjoys the pleasure of seeing you become a moaning mess beneath him.

So there Mingyu is, fucking the daylights out of you, one his palm cupping your cheek. And now here he goes, jotting his thumb out and pushing against your lips. It doesn’t even take a second for you to part your lips, his thumb slipping inside.

“Good fucking girl,” he grunts under his breath where you roll your tongue over the pad of his finger tip. Faintly, Mingyu recalls the way you swiped your tongue over his dick and there he goes with a particularly hard thrust at the thought.

Your legs are folded up completely, thighs pressing into your chest deeply every time Mingyu pounds into you. A moan stifles up one after another, muffled by his thumb in your mouth, but somehow not getting any quieter.

It’s around this point when Mingyu starts to feel it, the way you squirm a bit more after each deep, pointed thrust. The way your mouth starts to widen more and more, moans getting louder by the moment. The way you’re tightening around him—and there goes his queue.

His thumb in your mouth is pulled out and quickly moved down your stomach between your legs and right on your clit. That’s when you move from moaning to downright whimpering—whining—into Mingyu’s shoulders.

Your toes begin to tighten as he continues to slam into you, every muscle in your body beginning to go limp as you rake your fingers into his back, trying to hold on to something to ground you.

“I know baby,” Mingyu moans, his hands holding onto your hips with such a tightness you know you’ll be left with bruises.

“I’m s’close,” you manage to gasp out, hips meekly pushing up as well to meet Mingyu’s half way. You’re trying your best to keep to it together but fuck, it all feels so good��his skin is so hot but somehow your core feels even hotter.

You feel tears of pleasure roll down your cheeks when you finally feel it—Mingyu’s length so deep inside of you, pressing up against your walls in all the right places—and so you crash.

Moaning and whimpering and writhing beneath him, you cry out when you finish, “Mingyu, fuck! I’m—’m coming.”

To which Mingyu gently kisses your neck while roughly pounding into you harder, now trying to meet his own end in deep fervor. “I know baby, I know jus’—fuck,” he nearly cuts himself off with his own moan when he feels your tight pussy squeeze around him. “Just’ hold on for me a little longer s—oh.”

You’ve got some spell on him. That’s got to be it. A damn spell has got to be the reason Mingyu’s finding himself way quicker than he’s ever before.

You’re brain is a bit too fucked to register the beautiful mix of shock and pleasure that crosses over Mingyu’s face when he begins to paint your soft walls white. “Fuck,” Mingyu groans loudly, pressing his dick so deep into you that you think you’d be able to feel it through your belly.

You squeal softly at the feeling—your pussy is now a hot, sopping, sensitive mess, and Mingyu’s cock is just far too long and far too fat for you to handle. However, the feeling of his seed fill you up has a warmth that overtakes the slight feeling of discomfort.

The air in his room begins to grow quiet and still as Mingyu finally slips his softening length out of you. You still lay with your back against the sheets, Mingyu pulling himself off without a word and flopping down on the bed next to you.

This silence is new.

It’s not uncomfortable, but there still seems to be some unspoken words that fill the space between you and Mingyu. Only the sound of your heavy breaths fills the room, the erratic patterns steadily starting to even out.

“Was that enough repayment for you?” you finally ask casually, breaking the silence. Mingyu chuckles softly.

“It was … pretty nice, I guess,” he responds, pushing himself up into a sitting position to fix the covers more comfortably over the both of you.

You narrow your eyebrows up at him. “Pretty nice? I’m gonna kill you!”

This time Mingyu laughs. “What do you want me to say? Yeah, it was fucking amazing?”

You try to ignore the butterflies in your stomach. “Well, would that be the truth?” you challenge him, a smirk making its way onto your lips.

“Of course it would be,” Mingyu scoffs—something about his shameless admission of praise has your cheeks burning and eyes lighting up. “But if I say that, then it means you’ve fully repaid me, and that means that we don’t have to do this again.”

“Ah I get it, so you’re lying to me so you can fuck me again,” you reply. Mingyu rolls his eyes at you.

“If that’s what you want to call it,” he pauses, and looks like he’s contemplating something before continuing. “But I mean, you can totally say no. Because with the way you’re talking, it seems like you aren’t interested so why don’t I save you the pain of having to reject me and—” As he turns away to grab something from his night stand, you cut him off.

“Hey, I didn’t say that!” you exclaim once you catch where he’s going. You say it so brazenly it startles Mingyu a little, and he turns around to face you.

Your eyes meet and oh—there it is again. That feeling in your stomach, a warm knot that tumbles around. You’re not sure what it means. You’re not sure what this means—this being you laying in Mingyu’s bed.

Something in the way Mingyu looks at you tells you you’re not going to have an answer for a while.

Something in the way Mingyu smiles at you tells you that you’re at least going to have some fun trying to find out.

a/n: hopeeeee u guys liked it! btw reader is a self insert so if u don't like her GET AWWWT. anywho i was rly nervous about posting this but here we go ... wait can u guys believe it took me literally 3 months to write this smut. i had the entire fic + more follow up stuff but all i had to write was this chunk of smut in the middle and i didn't do it literally just because i didn't want to. i don't like writing smut in full lenth fics anymore (ramble time. pls ignore me) because i have to write the entire scene. like i enjoy smut drabbles because it's fun i get to experiment but unless it's a full length fic related to a sex relate concept then it's fun (aka crybaby). i personally don't really enjoy most of the other smuts i write for things like this fic + flight of the stars, etc, because it's just the same kind of smut scene rewritten in different ways. i feel i'm not even doing it in different ways atp—I FEEL I AM LITERALLY WRITING THE SAME SCENES I HAVE WRITTEN BEFORE. how many different ways can one write "oh my god that feels so good" like sorry. okay i'm done with my rant and for clarity i actually do not care this much. i just think it's funny but i get it because i like little smuts like this when i read it's just a pain to write because at some point it's hard to get creative and i feel like i'm being a lazy writer :/ i write all this and complain and blah blah but i do really enjoy it like OK yeah i spent 3 months writing this smut but it ended up being way longer than i anticipated so ummm whose fault is that?! (everyone look away from tumblr user toruru) ok sorry if u stayed til the end of this author's note actually please let me know and i will be sending u virtual kisses. anywhp pls feel free to leave comments/reblogs they mean the absolute world to me

[midnite-c6]

thanos and namgyu putting your bed in between theirs 🙏🙏 even if you chose to stop playing the game they are still making you go to the circle side to sleep and perhaps that night they could change your mind about the next time you vote..

this trope is js the best fr in another life im an X picker and these two teach me to b obedient to their requests💔

thanos & nam-gyu imagine !!!!!! pt. 3 💓

warnings: 18+ DARK content, noncon, sa

pleassee read at ur own risk

soooo, they're literally like dogs tryna chase you, even to as forcing you to be next to them : "shitheads, no matter what, i'm still gonna pick X. i'm not gonna be easily convinced." you tell them firsthand, and they both laugh to themselves

"she obviously won't listen to us, you think her stupid brain could handle it?" nam-gyu complained to thanos, annoyed by how thanos was so persistent in making you switch sides. you scoff since he wasn't so quiet in saying that either, "hey, fuck you, you think I'M stupid enough to play again? don't wanna die than-" "shut up, cunt." nam-gyu cuts you off, placing his hand on your mouth to shut you up, the cold metal of his ring grazing your warm skin. your instant reaction was to bite him, "agh- i'll fucking kill y-" "calm down! everybody chiiiillllll." thanos, like a saviour, stopped nam-gyu from hitting you. "i'm sure we can all have a fair agreement, everybody gets what they want. right, pretty?" thanos turned to look at you, pushing his face awfully close to yours. "and what i want iss.... you." he stares directly into your eyes, that creepy smirk with eyes you KNOW isn't sober at all.

"you could scream and cry all you want, but you know noone in this room would be bothered to help you, girl." nam-gyu whispers into your ears whilst thanos carries you to the bathroom..

nsfw beloww ＼⁠(⁠^⁠o⁠^⁠)⁠／ ->

you were now naked, your sweaty body laying on the filthy bathroom floor, noone could hear your cries for help when nam-gyu's cock forces you to deepthroat him, his hand pulling on your hair to further be balls-deep inside your mouth.. you'd choke on him, saliva dripping all over his dick and your chin. you couldn't scream... and you couldn't fight it either, if it weren't for thanos' stupid, rough hands wrapped around your arms, pinning them to the ground, your legs placed on his shoulders as his tongue laps up and down your folds.. you try your best to wiggle away (even tho its impossible) and thanos notices, "don't even.. don't even try to pretend, baby." you could feel him smile against your pussy, that sensation leaving you to moan against nam-gyu's cock. "been trying to suck in all your juices, pretty, and.. they just keep comin' out..." thanos mocks in a baby voice, "you're dripping... so you're actually a slut...a whore, huuhhh, not that cool, confident typa girl?" you cry, but.. why did you like the sensation? his warm tongue in and out of your cunt. at this point, the ecstacy that was in his mouth was getting your pussy high. "m'not into whores like you," thanos frowns and slides his' tongue up against your clit, biting it harshly, which made you yelp in pain, causing you to lightly bite nam-gyu's dick. he hissed, roughly slapping your face. "bitch!" he pulls your hair to face you, "do that one more fucking time and i'll speeden up your death, fuck." thanos' fingers came on cue, middle and ring finger plunging inside you, making you speechless, mouth open to nam-gyu's comment. he just takes it as an invitation to stuff your mouth again, leaving a low groan at the action.

"y'know dude,," thanos looks up at nam-gyu, "maybe we should keep her, after we win." nam-gyu scoffed, flicking your forehead, "you think you deserve to live, huh?" thanos chuckled, rubbing his fingers against your clit, he doesn't care if it felt good, you were just a toy afterall, "think about it.. she feels good, right? she'll be good for in the long run, trust me, man." "pft." "trust me! her cunts still tight, anyway, right princessssss?" your visions blurry, your will to live gone, still, atleast you're useful to someone or two, two of the most evilest dumbasses you'll ever encounter in your life.

[rooster-the-love-of-my-life]

Idiots At a Wedding pt.4

Summary: Pretending to be Bob's girlfriend in front of his family has to be easy right? Right...?

Pairings: Bob Floyd x fem!reader

Warnings: kissing, fake scenarios

A/N: Bobby's just like us girlies 😝😝 I'm very pathetic at writing love confessions and kisses so please, be kind. At first I was thinking of making this chapter longer, but I'm going tk be travelling day after and I do most of my writing at night, so I thought I'd give yall this today and then write in peace later. Anyways, happy reading and please don't be a stranger. Also, none of this is proof read, we die like men💪💪

series masterlist || part 3

To say you and Bob talked after you fully made out on his mother's porch would be a lie. A blatant, white faced lie.

As much as you would have liked to continue after being interrupted, or liked to have talked about the kiss, you didn't do any of it. Insted you both climbed the stairs to his room, changed out of your clothes and went right to sleep. You would think what happend would keep you up all night, but because of your general perpetual sleepiness and the alcohol in your system you slipped under the blanket of slumber pretty easily.

The next morning you woke, you found the bed empty, just like the morning before. But there was a certain uneasiness in the air that wasn't there the day before. After you freshened up and went downstairs, you were expecting to meet with the same chaos as yesterday, but the house was quiet. Mary and Annie were sitting on the couch, sipping their morning coffee while Andy slept soundly in the room.

"Morning." You announced yourself, making their heads turn to you. "Where is everyone?" Of course by everyone you meant just one person, Bob.

"Morning dearie." Mary greeted you, standing from her spot and rounding the kitchen island to grab a cup and pour you some coffee as well. "Bob and Jeff had to go visit the venue today. The manager's being a bit of an ass, so the boys went down there to see what's wrong."

"We should have sent her in place of Jeff. I'm sure that idiot would be intimidated by two navel officers." Annie commented once you and Mary sat down as well.

"That's true, but don't you worry about it." She patted her daughter's leg. "They'll handle the situation just fine."

You didn't know what to think in that moment. Half of you was sad you couldn't see Bob today, cause the job he was working on wasn't an easy on. But the other half of you was relieved since this distance gave you some time to get your thoughts and feelings in order, but knowing yourself, you knew you were just going to end up overthinking the whole day.

"I'm sorry for interrupting you and Robby last night." Annie whispered, once her mother was up and out of earshot. "I didn't mean to act like a total cockblock, but I guess I did."

"It's alright." You waved your hand I'm a way if dismissal. If only she knew the truth of what was happening, if only.

"Please tell me yall did some hanky panky last night. I'd love to know at least someone's getting some each night." Annie sighed, sprawling across the armrest. "Having a kid is not for the weak. It's like you've birthed a perpetual cockblock. But I must admit, the process was quiet fun." She winked at you as she said the last part, making you short out with laughter.

"Well we-" You stared, but were waved quiet by her.

"Actually, no. I don't wanna know about the sex life of my baby brother. That is where I draw the line." You couldn't help but giggle uncontrollably at the turn the conversation had taken.

You two talked for about an hour after that, discussing whatever came to your mind. You asked her how Jeff and her met, she asked you how life in the navy was. You told her about your high-school debate team days and she told you all about college swim meets. You were finding a really, true friend in Annie and you just couldn't bare the thought of breaking her heart if she ever found out the truth.

"Have you ever thought of having kids?" She asked, handing you your second cup of coffee.

"I-I've never actually thought of it." You stuttered out. You were lying of course, you had thought of kids, a husband, a house near the sea. You'd thought of it all, but always kept these thoughts close to yourself. "Oh who am I kidding. I have thought it, so much that my head hurts at times."

Annie trusted you and you trusted her, so you saw no point in hiding or lying to her about this.

"I've never told this to anyone, but I've thought about this whole ordeal so much that I fear I might have jinxed it." You elaborated. "You know, every since I was a kid, I've had this image of being the person who was always opposed to love. I never dated anyone in high school or college, I never even had a crush. So everyone expected that I would become the crazy single aunt in the future. But to be honest, all I want out of my life is a family. A good husband, beautiful, messy kids, stinky dogs, a big house near the sea. I want it all. But I'm so afraid that I'm going to get real close to it and as soon as I let myself think it's all actually happening for me, someone will turn the lights on and it'll all be a big prank."

"It's not wrong to want all those things and also being scared of it." Annie started, placing a hand comfortingly on yours. "But this fear might lead you to miss out on few of the best things in life. You'd never know if having a family is for you or not if you never try."

You smiled upon hearing her advice. She was right of course, but that still didn't stop your fear. You squeezed her hand in a way to say thanks, getting a firm, warm squeeze back.

"Our Bobby in any of your big plans?" She wiggles her eyebrows at you playfully, acting like she hadn't asked yout the most difficult question of all.

"Wouldn't you like to know." You brushed her off, but your heart was beating like a train on the tracks.

"Oh come on, you might not be able to tell me things about you sex life, but you can tell me if you think you have a future with him or not." She pushed, and you being the weak hearted woman you are, gave in.

"He's the only one I see a life with." You whispered, eyes falling to your coffee cup.

Annie let out a string of aww's, smiling widely at your confession. "Well, I can surely tell you he sees one with you."

"He does?"

"Oh yes he does. Wanna know how I know?" She leaned in, as did you, intrigued about what she was going to say next. "He let's you call him Bobby."

The speed by which a laugh escaped you was astronomical. You didn't mean to laugh, but to you her reasoning seemed so absurd. "That's not the reason."

"It sure is. He dosen't let anyone call him Bobby, ever, not even when he was a kid."

"I still don't believe you."

"Alright, why don't we do a little experiment to prove my theory?" She proposed.

"You have my attention." You raised an eyebrow.

"When he comes back home, I'll call him Bobby first and we'll see what his reaction is. And then you call him Bobby and see what his reaction is. If I'm right, you owe me five dollars."

"And if you're not you owe me ten." You placed your hand in front of her.

"Done." She shook you hand, confident e radiating off her face. Before either one of you could say anything else, loud cries came from Annie's room, indicating Andy woke up. "Ah, duty calls. I can't wait to see you lose."

"Keep waiting."

--------------------

Carrying all these big, messy emotions along with all the lies was eating at you. You thought this would be easy, but boy were you a foolish girl back then. This was by far the hardest thing you had ever done in your life, harder than flying a jet, harder than going on deadly assignments. And the only other person in the world who understood your situation, was the only person in the world youu couldn't talk to.

You need to talk about your feelings to someone, anyone. So the only right thing to do was to call up your entire call list and find a poor victim to rant to. The first person you tried was Phoenix, but her phone was busy. Next, it was Rooster, who was waiting football with Fanboy and Coyote, crossing two other people off your list. The last person left was the one person you fought with the most, Hangman.

Even though you were reluctant to call him, you had no other viable option. You dialed his number, secretly praying he wouldn't pick up, but when the call went through in the first ring, and his obnoxious voice poured though your speaker, you had to talk.

"Hey sunny, finnaly got a break from eye fucking little baby on board and realized you had other friends?"

"What's up Hangman?" You asked, trying to not jump into your problems from the get go and making it all about yourself.

"Nothjng much, Maverick's being a dick, as usual. Hondo is still getting off from watching us do all those pushups." He recounted the events for you. "I must say, it's been really nice since you've left. We've finally got some peace and quiet."

"Oh come on, fess up, you miss me the most." A smile played off on your face, even if you hadn't talked to the dagger squad for a really long time, you could always just pick up where you left off with them.

"Keep dreaming Sunny." He brushed you off, knowing damn well you were telling the truth. "Anyways, what's up with you? Any particular reason why you called me? Bob's quietness finally getting to you?"

"No." You rolled your eyes, starting to regret your decision a little bit, but still continued. "Actually, I did want to talk to you about something."

"Everything alright?" Jake asked worried, alerted by the chance in your voice.

"Yes, no, I don't know." You whined, falling onto the bed. "You have to promise not to tell anyone or laugh at what I'm about to tell you."

"Me making such promises depends on what you're about to tell me."

"Jake." You whined, irritated by his antics.

"Alright fine, I won't laugh or tell anyone. Happy? Now tell me what's up."

"So, funny story. I'm pretending to be Bob's girlfriend in front of his family for the duration of the wedding and last night we kissed each other even when there was no one around and now I don't know where we stand." You let everything out in one breath, biting the inside of your cheek, waiting to hear Hangman's reaction.

There was silence on the other side for a few seconds, you thought the connection might have gotten lost and you'd have to tell him what happed again. But when the sound of his annoying laughter flowed into your ears, you knew had made a mistake.

"Shut up." You grumbled, burying your face into the pillows.

"Wait, wait. Let me get this straight." He weezed through laughter. "You agreed to be Bob's fake girlfriend, the same Bob you've been in love with since forever, and now that things have blown up in your face, you're worried. This stupid even for you Sunny."

"Fuck off man, I didn't know this was going to happen."

"How didn't you?" He stressed. "Anyone could see this coming from a full universe away. But what excatly is the problem, he's not a good of a kisser as you thought?"

"No." You exclaimed almost too quickly. The thing is, we've been pretending to be a couple this whole time, but the things he's doing are making my brain short circuit."

"Elaborate."

"He's been calling me nicknames like sweetheart and darling. He's been touching me randomly, grabbing my hand or casually placing his hand on my waist. And then when we kissed in front of his family, he leaned in for more. More!" By now you were pacing around the room, recounting every little detail to Jake like a madman. "This was all fine, but last night we were coming back from dinner, no one else was with us, no one was watching, and we kissed. Kissed as in our lips touched and our tongues were halfway down each other throats-"

"I know what kissing is, keep the wattpad description to yourself." Jake butted in, fully grossed out.

"And then today when I woke up he wasn't there, and now his sister is saying thst she can see it on his face that he loves me. I'm going to pose my mind, I really am."

"Okay, calm down. Take a deep breath and sit down." Jake said trying to soothe you. "Now listen to me carefully. I might not know a lot of things, but one thing I do know is that Bob is not acting, he's not pretending, if you would have called anyone other than me, they would have told you the same thing. Cause for the past year and a half we've seen the fuck me eyes you two have been making at each other all the damn time while being scared to even talk to each other properly. Sunny, this is your opportunity. Go and get him. We all know Bob's not going to say anything, but you have to. You have to tell him you like him, you have to take this chance. Cause if you don't, believe me you're going to end up regretting it for the rest of your life. Now, whenever he comes back home, pull him aside and tell him the truth, trust me, it'll be worth it."

---------------

On the other side of town, Bob was crashing out. The entire car ride upto the wedding venue, all he thought of was the kiss, the feeling of your lips on his, how soft they felt, how sweet they tasted. If he put his mind to it, he could still taste the faint strawberry chapstick you had on, and it was making him feral. Evey single love song that came on the radio, he started associating with you and making scenarios to go along with them.

At one point he feard the mental asylum was the only place left for him to go.

Thankfully this time around Jeff hadn't noticed anything, being too tired to do so, and Bob had some time alone with himself to get his thoughts in order. The first thing he ascertained was that he no longer liked you. He was now completely, crazily, deeply in love with you. The kind of love where you start imaging what your house would look like and start picking out baby names. The kind of love that lasted even after one perished, the kind of love he always saw in his parent.

The second thing he confirmed to himself was that he needed to act on it, no matter how hard it got for him, no matter if he was sacred, he had to let you know. He couldn't even imagine losing you now that he almost had you. And if by chance he did, he would never forget himself, never walk down the road of love ever.

The only problem in this was that he still wasn't sure if you liked him back or not. A part of him was certain that you had just gotten sine drunk and kissed him in the spur of the moment. But the other part of him, the one thst worked on evidence, suggested different. You were the one who leaned in and kissed him first, you had to have liked him to do this.

Bob ended up in an endless cycle of 'she loves me she loves me not', a cycle not even the rude manager at the wedding venue could get hum out off. He thanked his older sister mentally thst day for marrying an intimidating man eho handled the situation mostly by himself, giving him chance to sprial even more.

On the ride back home, the sun was setting, cool wind was blowing through the car. He was staring at the landscape that passed him, when the radio started playing something by the Beatles. He had heard that song before, but he never really understood why Frank Sinatra regarded it as the greated love song ever written, until his mind started playing a montage of all the memories he had of you. The further the song played, every word, evey beat of the drum, every strum of the guitar just consolidated his resolve.

He was ardently, irrevocably in love with you.

----------------------

They reached home just in time for dinner, greeted by the smell of mouth watering food and light chatter. Everyone was already in the kitchen. Lucy and Annie were sitting on the high stools at the kitchen island watching their mother teach you an old family recipe when they arrived.

"Hey boys, how'd it go?" Annie greeted her husband with a small kiss as he slid into the stool next to hers.

"It went well." He answered, sighing deeply. "As well as it could go. He wanted more money out of us, but one look at Bob's ID and it was all sorted."

"Wasn't I telling you out Bobby could do it ma?" Annie slyly slipped in the world, on a mission to prove you wrong. You killed your head up upon hearing it and looked first at Annie, confirming the plan was in motion and then at Bob who was harboring an uncharacteristic sour face.

"Don't call me that." He grumbled, the change in his demeanor immediately noticeable. "I've told you a billion times to neve call me that."

"Oh come on, I've got to have a nickname for my baby brother." She pressed, amusement oozing off of her.

"Call me Robby like everyone else." The man offered, taking a gulp of cool water.

"Special nickname." All she got in return was a deathly glare from her younger brother.

It was now you time to test the theory. You were a hundred percent sure that you were going to get the same reaction out of him. So, with the sweetest voice you could possibly muster up, you cleared your throat and called out to him.

"Bobby, could you came and try this for me please? Tell me how it tastes."

His ears perked the second the sentence left your mouth, and he was already moving to you. You were in complete disbelief, did he really respond to Bobby just when you said it? It had to be a lie, he would come close and tell you not to call him that, but it never happened.

"Sure darling." He came and stood right behind you, muscular arms resting on either side, trapping you in between himself and the counter. He opened his mouth, patiently waiting for you to feed him the sauce, and it was the hottest thing you had ever seen a man do. If his whole family wouldn't have been there, you would have long forgotten the sauce and had him right there on the counter. "Mhh, tastes real good."

At that moment Bob saw an opportunity and he seized it. A little but of sauce had tricked down you hand and was reating on you palm. He grabbed the hand from the back, lifted it close to his mouth and licked it off of you. If what he'd done previously hadn't made you lose your mind, this just made you absolutely feral.

"I need to talk to you. Come up to our room in a bit." He whispered in you ear, as you stood still dumbstruck by what had just happened. "I'm gonna go take a bath before dinner." He announced, and then disappeared.

Where he had gotten this sudden burst of confident from, you had no clue. But this confidence was making him insanely attractive to you.

"Pay up." Annie snapped you out of all the filthy thoughts you were having about your co-worker when she put he hand in front of you to handher the five doller you had bet. "Didn't I tell you this was going to happen?"

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever." You grumbled, rolling your eyes while handing her the five dollers. "I'm gonna go and freshen up a bit if you don't mind. All this cooking has left me so so tired, I don't know how you do it Mary."

"Oh don't you worry about it dearie, you'll get the hang of it soon." She smiled, and you were off, almost sprinting up the stairs. Your heart couldn't take this gane of cat and mouse anymore, you were eager to find out what Bob was going to say to you.

Your confidence faltered the moment hkj reach the door, finally understanding the gravity of the situation. Cautiously, knocked on the floor before pushing it in to find Bob sitting on the bed, his back to you. He stood up once he heard the door open.

"Hi." He whispered. You could figure he was nervous right off the bat. So in attempt to ease the tension you made small talk.

"Hey, how was your day?"

"Pathetic." He blurted, shocking you.

"Everything okay? Did something happen at the venue?"

"Everything's not okay. Nothing is okay Sunny." Bob was looking right into your eyes as the words poured out of his mouth. Your heart was beating wildly, for a second you thought he might be able to hear you. You opened your mouth to ask him what happend, but he cut you off before you could even open you mouth.

"Nothing has been right for the past year Sunny. I used to be a normal guy before, I used to find people attractive, even went out on a couple dates but it all went out the window when I first saw you. You walked into the hard deck five minutes late with the biggest, brightest smile on your face and I swear, I haven't been the same from that moment. Form that night no one in the world could remotely come close to you. You're this wonderful, brilliant, beautiful, woman, the life of every party, everyone's favorite, everyone's best friend. You make anyone you meet feel like the center of the universe by the way you pay attention to them, you could talk up a tree if given the chance. And God it sacred the living shit out of me. I have never liked someone the way I have liked you, and once I saw you're this loud and exuberant, I started hiding from you, cause I never in my wildest dreams though you would go for someone like me. I hopeless and awkward and quiet and I'm so-"

"Shut up. Just shut up Bobby." Your legs moved on there own and crossed the room. You grabbed him by the shoulders and kissed hin right on the mouth. This time, he didn't hesitate. All the desperation, all the time you had missed pining over each other was poured into that one kiss. He had pulled you in so close, held you so tight, you didn't know where you ended and he started and you would have it any other way.

"I might not be good with words," You started, resting your head against his, gasping for air. "But I can kiss you dumb."

"I wouldn't have it any other way." He whispered, pulling up back in, engulfing your mouth with his own. Both your bodies felt as if they were on fire, and it was the best feeling you had ever felt. You stayed like this for a few more moments, just kissing each other, making up for lost time. "Wait, so this means you like me back?"

"Yes you idiot." You giggled, giving him another soft kiss, as his shoulder relaxed.

"Thank God. But there's two things I want you to know Sunny."

"What is it?"

"Number one, I'm taking you out on a proper date tommrow. And I mean proper, fancy restaurant, flowers, the whole shebang." He counted, making your heart melt and your cheeks turn rosy.

"And number two?" You questioned.

"Now that I have you, there's no way I'm letting you go."

Taglist:

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[eraserbread]

go as a dream, pt. 2 ft. ex-husband satoru gojo✧

୨୧ - ten years together, five years married -- it's a long time. too long to be running on borrowed time glued together by the past. leaving is easy, but staying away turns out to be impossible. → afab!reader, modern/no curses!au, long-established relationship, mutual pining, smoking, heavy angst, toxic relationship dynamics, mention of pregnancy/failure to conceive, rough sex, drinking, verbal outbursts, mentions of body and relationship insecurity, emotional sex, spitting, dub-con (?), masturbation, oral m!receiving, face-slapping, unhealthy possessiveness, slight sub-drop, mentions of readers relative hair length in contrast to gojo's, mentions of readers mother, nsfw → w.c. - 18.9k {1.45 hour reading time}

a/n: honestly, i don't know what to say anymore. this chapter ruled my life, and it only took me two weeks to complete -- I was just so invested and emotional. thank u all for the love on part one, which you can re-read here :)) again, sit with this for awhile. it's a lot of words to ingest and a lot of emotions to feel, but I think they're good ones. don't be too afraid to keep reading <3 ily! -elly

listen to the soundtrack (updated for pt.2), revisit part 1 <3

A cigarette passes through the warmth of the summer air, mid-morning rays bleaching the burning tip an eye-squinting shade of red. 

Shoko brings it to her lips, tongue in cheek as she stares past Suguru’s head. Perched at the back entrance to the Science building, the small expanse of cars parked neatly under sun covers distracts her piercing gaze. She shakes her head, lowering the smoke to ash it quickly, then reaches to take a drag. 

“You don’t think it’s gonna affect us?” She continues, growling something of a sigh into the openness. It’s clear as day, Shoko is not having a good morning. You were supposed to return today, but so is Satoru. This divorce wasn’t even her problem, but the entire staff base was going to feel the ripples. Every single one of the 120 faculty members was aware of the marriage. Satoru is everyone’s favorite – you were his rock. 

“Only if you allow it to.” Suguru crosses his arms at his chest, squinting as he peeks behind him. The crunch of tires pulls his attention just like it pulled Shoko’s. “Look, I texted him the other night, didn’t get a response, and moved on with my life.” He shrugs, sharp shoulders soft against the blur of harsh light. “Satoru’s so easy to read that it’s shameful. He wants to be alone – needs it, too. It’s like he’s allergic.” 

Shoko hums, pursing her lips around another drag before handing it off to Suguru. She’s looking past his head again, thinking she recognizes the sleek, black car that pulls in behind the school. 

She does. It’s Satoru’s. 

“Speak of the devil,” She mentions, glancing up at Suguru when he peeks over his shoulder again. “That’s probably Jo.” 

“Oh-” Suguru shoves the cigarette between his lips, cheeks hollowing around the drag he sucks out. If Shoko was right, Satoru hated the smell of smoke – he’d complain with the biggest shit-eating grin on his face. It’s a habit; there’s a jump behind Suguru’s step as he walks to meet Satoru halfway. Shoko’s standing up like she’s about to head inside, light eyes squinted as she watches him shrink with distance. “Oh, shit.” 

“Whaaaat?” Shoko springs up, hand latched onto the metal. Suguru halts in his tracks at the end of the ramp, grip tightening against the rail. She can just see the look on his face in her mind; he doesn’t have to be looking over for her to know. 

“They’re getting a divorce, right?” 

“What do you mean – yeah.” 

“Okay, well, they don’t look very separated to me.” Suguru’s pushed out of the way as Shoko stumbles over her feet for a good vantage point. He’s not lying; you and Satoru are together. It’s just like things always were; he holds the door open for you, gaze dead ahead as he waits for you to slip out. That poor door slams shut – his body so packed full of hot tension they could feel it from so far away. 

You aren’t looking at him either, wary with a short peek over your shoulder when you emerge. Satoru is wearing a tight, dark, long-sleeved shirt in the peak of this heat – you’re wearing long, dark pants. 

Everything is right – normal. Why does it feel so wrong? Something is off.

“Go – go, we have to hide.” 

“What? No, I want to know what’s going on-

“Oh, he looks so pissed.” Shoko gasps behind her hand. “He’s wearing the glasses – Geto, the glasses.” 

“I see the glasses. Come on.” The cool air from inside the building soothes Shoko’s back like a thick, welcome blanket. Sure, inside would lead to hours of emotionally uncompelling work, but it’d be better than second-hand embarrassment. She’s wise enough to deduce that nothing good will come from this situation. 

Shoko ducks out, sliding under Suguru’s stretched arm, keeping the door propped. They both dart from the entrance.

“What a shit show. Someone is lying.” Shoko’s nearly running down the hallway, breath heavy in her throat. It’s still too early for students to be in yet, but a scattered few roam the halls, breaking their necks when the pair rushes hot past them. 

“Don’t bring it up; just act normal,” Suguru mutters, pushing the door to the staff room open for Shoko to step into. They know it's where you two would stop once you arrived – it’s where everyone is gathered. 

At least three heads turn at the dramatic entrance. 

Utahime stands up from her spot at the head of the table, a thick, leather-bound book open towards the end that she entirely disregards. “Shoko!” 

“Gojo’s are coming.” 

Two seats down from Utahime, back as straight as a pen, Mei annotates paper assignments, nails as red as the ink on the page. She hums – slow, controlled. “Didn’t you say they broke up?” 

“That’s the issue, just be normal.” 

They don’t have to tell Nanami twice – he takes his coffee, drops his conversation, and leaves the room like he was never there. Takuma watches him walk out on their discussion, sputtering like a fish out of water. 

“What is happening?” He turns around, eyes blown wide. “Suguru?” 

“Sit. Be normal.” Suguru snatches his shoulders, pushing him into the empty seat opposite Mei. His heavy touch lingers, and one hand fumbles in his back pocket for his phone. 

“Don’t say anything about the divorce, or I’ll strangle you,” Shoko speaks through gritted teeth, holding her hand in a tense claw in Takuma’s relative direction. He slumps down like he’s guilty, letting Suguru’s weight sink in. 

“I didn’t even know they were getting divorced…” He trails off, voice light as a feather. 

“Shut up,” Shoko and Suguru hiss at the same time, wary of the shadows that pass the covered windows every time one appears. She’s keeping an eye out for a pair of them – intertwined by the arms like you and Satoru always do. 

It never comes. 

The door clicks, creaks, then settles. You walk inside, your head heavy and your gaze low. Shoko gives a breath of relief. 

“Hi, stranger.” Suguru purrs. 

“Oh my God – you didn’t sleep?” Shoko clicks her teeth, turning on her feet, and she crowds you at the door. You feel pitiful standing in the way, arms crossed over your sensitive frame, still singing and sore from last night. There’s a crip in your walk – a numbness in your eyes. 

“Oh, Gojo.” Utahime pouts, standing to greet you, hiding no pity behind her words. It’s all over your face, you feel like shit. 

“Don’t call her tha-

“Whatever, it’s fine.” You cut Suguru off, knowing he has good intentions but belittled by the air of it all. Utahime goes in to hug you – your chest aches as she cradles it. “I guess it’s nice that everyone knows. I don’t have anything to hide.” You smile when she pulls away, avoiding eye contact so she can’t see the lie in your gaze. It’s bad enough you can’t even hide it in your tone. 

Shoko is chewing her bottom lip raw, poking and squeezing at it with manicured fingers. She wants to say more – wants to point out the stumble in your step and the drowsiness in your eyes. She wants to point out the fact that you came here with him, but knows it's inappropriate. After all, you and Satoru live together and share a car – it’s not unheard of that you two are still around each other. She just worries about the headspace it’d lower you into. 

Satoru, when he’s upset, is an entirely different person. Every ounce of heat in his soul drops, leaving icy lakes where his heart should be. He jokes through it all, making sly digs at Shoko’s unhealthy habits or how useless he thinks she is as a friend. Always, he’d laugh it off, then drop his expression like it was never there. He’s too good at being an asshole – it’s why she’s so wary. 

“You sure you’re good to be back?” 

You ignore her. “Hi Mei, Takuma.” 

“Hi, beautiful. Long time no see, hm?” 

“Good to see you, Gojo.” 

“Stop-” You reach for Shoko’s shoulder as she whips around to scold him. “I don’t care. I’m not changing my name.” 

She turns back to you, eyes wide with worry. You can hear the unsaid words vibrating off of her bare lips. They wash over you with the weight of the world. Everyone is staring. 

Utahime crosses her hands at her waist, clearing her throat as the dust settles in the room. Takuma peeks up at Suguru as he steps away, wanting to say more but far too conscious of the space they found themselves in. 

“Smart.” Mei hums, not having looked up from her work since you entered. She tilts her head, light, loose hair falling over the pressed, blue blazer over her shoulder. “Don’t let one bad Gojo ruin the name for you.” 

“You know you’re not helping, right?” 

“Bye, Ieiri. Your abrasiveness would be endearing if she were actually a child who needed support.” Though she threatens to walk away, Mei doesn’t move. She doesn’t even reciprocate the hazel daggers Shoko is sending her. “It seems this conversation is a bit suffocating. Why don’t you move it outside.” 

“Is that a suggestion?” 

“Let’s just-” Suguru jumps into action, peeling his dark eyes from his glaring white phone screen. “Come on – she’s right.” 

“We don’t have to talk about it at all.” You scoff as Suguru nudges both of you out of the frosted glass door. “You two are making this into a spectacle.” 

“Oh, I guess it’s fuck me then? Okay.” 

Suguru scoffs once the door closes on the rest of his colleagues.“Sho- are you just incapable of calm?” 

“I need a cigarette.” She decides, turning on the ball of her flat shoes. In one fluid, flustered stroke, she’s pulling out her pack and her phone, grumbling something likely aimed at Suguru that you couldn’t catch onto. 

“Is she serious?” You scoff, eyes burning a bit at the rush of emotion so early in the day. You’re still incredibly fragile from a silent, ugly morning with Satoru, facing his glaring and silent treatment all the way here. You felt worthless in his bed, in his car, and now you’re an outsider at work. 

Suguru stands with his hands stuffed in his front pockets, his knee jutted as the back entrance rushes open and slams shut. He squints against the light, bangs reacting to the breeze. “She’s just overwhelmed with the change of workload. She’s fine.” 

“Have you heard from Satoru?” 

“Oh.” Suguru flips his phone around in his pocket, biting over his lip as he feels your short stare burn the side of his face. “Texted a few minutes ago. He just said he was on campus – came in through the front.” 

“Like he’s avoiding me.” You sigh, gaze falling as you turn back to the hallway. Sugu’s close behind in every one of your movements, head tilting like a confused puppy. He knows you two drove together… Toru’s doing a pretty shitty job at avoidance, then. 

“You don’t even have to be in the same vicinity as him today. Don’t let it bother you.” 

You suck your cheek, hoisting your bag further up your shoulder as you weigh your options. You could go back to the break room and kill ten minutes before the day started, or you could duck into the bathroom and cry this energy out. Right now, the latter is the best option. 

“You understand, don’t you?” You turn around, peeking over your shoulder at his hunched frame. Your lips are shaking with a familiar rush of emotion. Yeah – you’re about to cry. “It’s so hard to see when you’ve lost your light.” 

Suguru stares at you like an emotionless, gutted fish. Lips parting to bring you back as you start to walk away. You take a few steps, then turn into the bathroom hallway, face beet-red as tears start down your face before you can hide. 

Your languid pace turns into flustered steps, hiding your running nose behind your fist. Through your peripheral, Suguru locks eyes with you just before you disappear. He feels backed into a corner – broad shoulders weighed down by bricks he didn’t place. 

Suguru sighs, eyes rolling in his skull as he turns back to the break room. Mei finally looks up when he pushes back inside, but he doesn’t care to notice. He needed to tell Toru what was on his mind. 

To: Satoru Gojo I actually want to die a little inside. I’ve never seen her cry before, please let this be the last time Oh, i’m so sick From: Satoru Gojo Wdym?  Are you talking about Gojo? She’s a literal train wreck, just avoid her

Satoru looks up from his phone, pulling his square-framed glasses from his face as he steps inside the building. For some reason, he finds a smile crossing his lips at the feeling of being back – he’s riding on a dangerous high, eyes flickering the white fluorescent lights. On his phone, he can see the three dots undulate across the bottom of his screen as Suguru responds, but he tucks it away just as the message appears on his screen. He wouldn’t be distracted right now – today was a big day. 

It’s the day every student waits for – the day when Satoru takes over office hours. In charge like that, he’s gentle and enthusiastic. Scarily good at his job, too. A small cult following had bloomed around him – girls even opting to take Nanami’s course so that they could sit a little closer to their beloved Gojo.

He feels on top of the world when he lets himself lead. It’s still unknown as to why he’s still just an aide, but you know why. Satoru is as straight-backed as they come. He doesn’t drink, do drugs, lie, or steal. He hardly cusses – never, ever getting mad… unless he’s around you. Their beloved Gojo becomes Satoru when 5 o’clock hits.

He’s grown up as the wonder boy, always wanting to do things by the book. He went to school and immersed himself in his studies to escape from his family, devoting all his energy and sanity to it. That’s why he graduated early – taking that first opportunity at freedom and education by the horns and riding off with it. It only took him two years of schooling to get his first career line as an aide at Tokyo-U, and he’s still there nearly eleven years later, hanging off of Nanami’s bootstraps – aging him twice as fast. 

 Satoru absorbs Nanami’s information like a dehydrated sponge, coming back to life every time a new nugget of knowledge plants itself inside of him. It’s all he lived for before he met you, and loving you wasn’t even the end goal. He never wanted to get married but couldn’t stand the thought of seeing you with another man. Even now, moping about the science hall, the thought bubbles in his throat like he needs to expel it. 

No, he wouldn’t think about you now. He needs to swallow it down. 

Then, the perfect distraction presents itself at the crossroads in front of him – Nanami and his beloved protégé, Yuji Itadori. He’s one of Satoru’s favorites, too – the only one who can carry his humor in non-humorous spaces. 

“Sir, I’m really excited about all the stories you’ll have to teach when you come back! Please bring us souvenirs.” Itadori is begging with his arms clasped, dangerously close to Nanami’s footpath. The older man cradles the coffee he brought from the break room, golden eyes flickering from the steam he’s nursing to his peer. 

“It’s much more than a pleasure trip, Itadori. I will be in and out of various Universities doing guest lectures with little time to rest or sight-see.” Nanami is typical, just as straight-edged as Satoru, albeit in a stricter sense. Nanami didn’t need anyone around him – Satoru needed everything. 

He needs this twenty-two-year-old kid to like him, which is why he approaches him as if they’re friends, not a teacher and peer. 

“Itadori!” Satoru rushes to the scene, sticking a hand in Itadori’s light locks and ruffling them unkempt. “What are you doing here, kid? Did you sign up for my office hours?” 

“I was the first person who put the request in! Kugisaki told me they were all full two minutes later… she had to settle for Nanami’s after his break.” 

“Settle?” 

“Ah – don’t take it personally, Nanamin.” 

“Don’t call me that.” 

The pair break out in devious laughter. Nanami rolls his eyes, ready to walk away and find peace in his empty lecture hall. Something stops him – it’s the way Toru looks at him with his long arm slung across Itadori’s shoulders. They’re nearly twins like this once their outward appearances fade away. They’re just two smirking idiots burning holes in Nanami’s aging face, not saying a thing. 

“I heard you two talking about Malaysia. I know you’re excited, and so am I.” 

“Mm, because you can pretend to be me for a full month – I know.” 

“I’m excited, too! Inumaki mentioned sneaking into the lecture in my place next Thursday… and I told him no.” 

“Good. Respectful.” Satoru mentions. Nanami sighs again. 

“Please don’t sneak students in while I am gone.” 

“I’ll make sure he won’t.” Satoru smiles like an elated child, pearly white teeth on full display. Bells don’t ring early in the morning like this, but at the turn of the hour, Itadori notices immediately and shrugs from Toru’s grip. 

“Sir! I will see you this afternoon.” He bows deep enough to show he respects the pair with his life, but not enough to make it odd or showy. Nanami nods him away, and then Itadori turns to Satoru. He goes in for a hug. 

“Do good work today.” 

“Yes, sir.” He nods, so sure of himself and glistening with the only praise he needs. “Goodbye Nanamin! Bye, Gojo!” 

Once they’re alone and Nanami tries to flee, Satoru finds a way to hook his attention once more. He stuffs his hands in his pockets and smirks, “You know, I’ve been meaning to congratulate you.” 

“For what?” 

“Well, isn’t your dream coming true? You know, any school in Malaysia would hire you without question. Japanese is so highly sought after there. So is science – especially mind science. You could get your hands on some cool research material. Everyone's willing to have their mind poked for a little bit of money” 

“You just know this course will be handed to you on a platter. Not that I’d have it any other way, of course. You spent the last decade fleshing out these units with me.” 

“Your encouragement means more than you know.” 

“I respect you, Gojo.” He nods, finally taking a sip of the coffee he’s letting get a bit too cool. “I won’t be your friend, but I respect your relationship with your students as well as your colleagues. You’re more fitted to be a Professor than a lot of them already here.” 

“But the system-

“Ah, the system.” Nanami rolls his eyes, hyper-aware of the time ticking away. He needed his dark, quiet time, and Gojo was pulling that from him with every chatty second. “Systems are made to be dismantled, aren’t they?” 

That’s what he leaves Satoru with, and the lingering smell of his shower from this morning. It makes him think for a moment – about his boss, or Nanami’s boss. The way they judge scores and hand out punishments when grades drop, and students drop out. To a high degree, they have nothing to do with lazy pupils or people who make poor decisions about their majors, but when they do fall short, it consumes them. There’s no need to rub salt in the wound, but it's common practice when teaching. 

Control is so fragile in this field – when you’re nurturing new minds. 

Toru slams the door shut on you with the same vigor he showed this morning. You two waited three hours after the day ended to shrug off back home together. The sun is setting in the warm sky – you’re quiet and nervous. Today had been shitty, but freeing in its own way. It gave you time and space, free from Satoru and his seedy, strict ways. You’re talking to people that you haven’t seen in a month, and the normalcy is sparkling off of you. 

What a shame that one look at Satoru’s covered eyes and you’re slinking back into insecurity. He was just so cold. 

He’s an iceberg personified – a walking flurry of winter snow that keeps flying under your jacket, making your skin sticky and wet. You hate it – you hate him, right now. 

Yet, you stay. You let him treat you like this because you’re the idiot. A flustered, selfless idiot who uses her body as ransom for a love it’ll never feel again. You wish you could go back in time and bottle the feeling of the last night you and Toru actually made love. If you close your eyes, you’re back there – back pressed into his sheets, his sweet name on your lips, and the climax just seconds away. He told you he loved you on a loop. Yes, he wanted you swollen with his babies, but that’s nothing abnormal in the heat of the moment. He made sure you knew just how much he loved you. 

When he gets back in the car, you’re rudely jolted from your head, numb to the noise but nervous about what would transpire once he settles so close. You know he doesn’t want to talk to you – he’s said it on multiple occasions on the way here, but that won’t stop you. You still pine for him – still yearning for a shred of attention, even if it’s platonic. You just don’t want him to hate you… never, ever. 

As stupid as it sounds, all you wanted was yourself back. If living a life known as only Satoru Gojo’s wife was your destiny, you’d kill yourself trying to run away from it but would stumble two steps back just to feel him again. 

What a cruel existence… you let your head fall into your open palm. 

Just like he promised, Toru doesn’t speak a word to you as he pulls off, glasses sitting over his hair so he can squint at the road. With both hands on the wheel, you can peek over and see just how tense he is. Thick veins protrude against his pale skin, leaving purpley streaks and tinges against the ocean. Of course, you’d only notice this. Your throat burns. 

“I… I ordered my new bed today.” 

“Will it be here today?” 

You pause, unsure of his tone. He just seems transactional – as if all the life had been sucked from his soul. “No,” You reply, soft as a whisper. It’s lost against the rush of the road. 

“Speak up, or don’t speak to me at all.” 

“You don’t have to be so mean.” 

“And you don’t have to be so goddamn pathetic, but here we are!” He explodes, finally free after holding in anger all day. He used to hate lashing out at you like this – he never really did, but you were the bane of his existence right now, pestering at his ear like an angry fly. “You cried in front of Suguru today. Do you see how terrible that makes me look? I can’t even pretend to care through text, and I shouldn't feel like the bad person, but that’s how it looks, doesn’t it?” 

“I-I didn’t cry-

“You’re gonna call him a liar?” He whips his head around, blue eyes wide and crazy. You can always nail down how he’s feeling with the glint of his eyes. They’re blown and dull – he’s mad. They’re bland and sparkling – he’s endeared. It hurts to know him so well. “You’re seriously going to sit here and call Suguru a liar to my face? Are you dense?” 

“Satoru, I’m sor-

“No! No, you don’t get to be sorry.” His grip tightens. He rolls his shoulders back, so tense that it’s almost painful. “You don’t get to be sorry… not when you’re the one that left. I’ve never felt hurt like that before – it tore me apart.” 

You’re crying now. You can’t help it – the emotion in this tiny car is so thick and hot that you feel suffocated. He’s always been one to swallow his pain or just ignore it through and through. He hates his family but visits them every year. He hates the commercials that interrupt his favorite show but will sit through each one willingly. He hates loud, sudden noises but doesn’t flinch at them. He hates you but loves you. He wants to hurt you, then turn around and heal it brand new. 

Right now, all he wants to really do is yell. It’d make him feel brand-new. 

So, that car ride home is the worst thing you’ve ever put yourself through. It’s constant – belittling, nasty, and loveless. He doesn’t stop. 

“I think it’s so funny – you’re the one telling me to be kinder, when I used to beg for that. Do you understand just how much I begged for you when you were already emotionally checked out? Nobody deserves that.” 

“I-I didn’t-

“You don’t get to speak – you get to listen.” He pauses, taking a breath, then starts again. “You didn’t even spare me a stupid meal – not unless I forced you. I had the swallow back the urge to call you a cold bitch because I felt some type of dedication to you. Call it respect – but it’s all gone now.” Another pause – he has to catch his breath.“You just make me sick. Truly… And when you crawl into my bed feeling lonely tonight,  I want you to feel as disgusting as I felt this last year.” 

Satoru has to stop again. He has to give it to you. “I don’t know… it just feels so good not having to worry about upsetting my wife.” He lifts his hands from the wheel, adding fitting air quotes around the phrase he lost access to a month ago. “I can fuck every person that looks my way, come home smelling like it, and always count on you to open your legs. Are you not ashamed?” He finally spares you a look, not even reacting to the silent, shaking sobs you’re trying to stifle. 

“I’m just so exhausted with being good for you. I’m exhausted with holding your hand and kissing it better when you never did the same for me. You’re cold, calculated, and cruel. So fucking cruel, and I want you to feel it.” Staring you down again, it feels like knives in your back. “Do you feel it? How much I hate you right now? I want it to hurt.” 

“Fucking classic. Pathetic, sad coward. I hate you. I hate what we have.” 

Somewhere, buried in the deepest part of yourself, you conjure up something to defend yourself. “I don’t want to be with you. Look at how you’re speaking to me!” 

“Oh, fuck me! For years, you’ve called me useless, pathetic, and annoying – years! Isn’t that your favorite term, “Stop annoying me, Satoru”? Huh? Am I annoying you right now? Well, I’m not sorry.” He’s flailing like a polite maniac, hair ruffled and disheveled as he nervously runs a hand through it, trying to use the road to balance out his emotions. His heart is beating so fast, you’re crying in his ear, and he’s numb to the core. “I’m not fucking sorry because you’re an entitled brat. My family took you in last time, and you were worried about them thinking you’re fat – they just wanted to cherish you!” 

Your jaw hangs open – those arrows hitting a deeper part of you. “That’s not what happen-

“I’m doing the talking – me!” He whips over at you, swapping hands on the wheel so he can dig a finger in his chest. “How ungrateful, and you still have the nerve to walk around with that Gojo crest on your skin.” 

“J-just stop!” You’re sobbing, trying to hide behind your hands as they cover your face. You’re pushed all the way to the door, cowering in on yourself to dodge his bullets. You’ve never seen him like this, and you never want to see him like this again. The Toru sitting to your right was not the same boy you married. “Stop, okay?! I get it!” 

“If you get it, you’ll get a hotel. You’d sleep on the bare floor and shiver all night, but I know you better than that. You want to be touched – you need to feel real, satiated, and wanted, right? What if I said I didn’t want you anymore? That your body disgusts me, and I’d rather use my hands?” Satoru doesn’t think he means what he says, but he speaks it like he does. If it hurts you, good. It can’t hold a flame to the years of emotional neglect you put him through. “Silence. That’s what I thought.” 

You’re a shell of yourself, existing with holes riddled through your exhausted body from his shots. It feels like once it’s over… It’s over. He’s done, finally empty from the thoughts making him manic. You know he hates you, now. He made it clear that you’re the reason he hates you, and it just makes your decision feel even more right. 

Your husband is gone. 

You sob while he calms down, heavy breathing morphing into contented sighs and occasional head shakes. You feel like a disobedient child after being scolded, ashamed, and wanting to melt away. You never wanted to speak to him again, but you’re so close. You let your eyes slip shut. 

Minutes pass — however many needed to until you’re back home. Toru doesn’t say much, but he is chewing his lip when he parks. “I’m sorry.” 

You scoff. “Now I really don’t wanna talk about it.” 

He huffs out a defiant breath, slamming that fucking car door again just like he’s been doing all day. Still, he makes the time to get out and open yours for you. 

“I didn’t mean that stuff I said about my parents.” He whispers, leaning against the doorframe, eyes lost somewhere in the deepening horizon. “Yes, I think you’re crazy… But so am I, then. I think it’s the fact that you bring it out of me.”

“Satoru, do not speak to me.” 

He thrusts his hand towards you, putting your coolness on display. “Look at you – cold as ice.”

“Are you fuck- Are you serious? You just called me every name in the book, then you try to lighten things up with your shitty sayings?” You reach past him, using the side of the car to stand up and not his outstretched hand. “Nothing is funny right now, Satoru. If you want to hate me, how about you hate me completely?” 

“If you want to leave, how about you leave me completely?” 

You shoulder past him, unable to hide that look on your face, he can’t see. Then, there are people around, and you two have to put a lid on your boiling emotions. Your lips snap shut. 

You two play the role of the emotionally detached young couple too well — you don’t even glance at each other in the lobby or in the elevator. He’ll peek over at you sometimes, wondering if you’ll be looking back. There’s nothing. 

He unlocks the apartment door when you step beside it. As the lock turns, words bubble in your throat. You swallow them down, Satoru lets you in first, thoughtful even in the thick of this seismic rift.

“I have some work to do, so you can figure out dinner.” He starts, key clinking on the hard countertop as the door draws shut. 

“I’m not cooking for you.” 

“Then, there’s plenty of laundry to do.” 

“Just shut up — do you hear how demeaning you sound right now?” You scoff, kicking your black loafers in the corner by the door for him to pick up. 

“What else do you do when we’re at home?” He’s mad, too, wanting to jump down your back for painting him into someone he’s not. “You don’t work from home, I do. I work from home after eight hours on campus — you make sure the home is neat and dinner is made! Why are you so hellbent on fighting me all the time?!” 

Desperate for a shred of control, you fight back. “I work from home, too!” 

“What are you so desperate to prove?!” 

“That I’m not your wife anymore, Satoru! I signed it away, it’s not who I am!” 

“Tell me, Gojo.” He lets himself calm down — two deep breaths, and he leans a propped arm against the countertop. “Who are you, then? Do you even know?” 

He wants a reaction so bad, calling you that name. You won’t give in, you spit venom and then turn your back. “I hate you.” 

“Yes, but answer the question.” 

“You stole every single chance of self-discovery I had.” You don’t know why, but you’re storming off to the spare room in hopes of peace. You know he’ll follow you, and he does, but he’d never undermine you and open the locked door when you don’t want him to. Not even after saying all that to you. He’ll let the lightness of his hair rush in the heavy breeze from the slam, blinking when that lock turns and the thump of your bag hits the floor. 

Still, he reaches for the knob, giving it one little shake. “You know, I really am sorry. There were better ways to air my frustrations out without resorting to name-calling and accusations.” 

“Fuck off Satoru.” You deadpan, absolutely no emotion behind your tone as you unbutton your blouse in the bedroom mirror. He heavy-sighs against the wood. 

“I’m gonna work for a few hours, then grab some takeout. I’ll let you know when it's here.” 

“Don’t bother.” 

Biting down on you is like crunching through ice, and Toru’s teeth are chipped and sensitive. He doesn’t fully realize that you’re retaliating in the one way he hates – by ignoring him. 

There is absolutely nothing Satoru Gojo hates quite like the silent treatment. Fittingly, nobody can dish it up like him either. There were times when you were clawing your skin bloody for an ounce of verbal support, all for him to turn his nose up at you and walk the other way. 

It’s what you have to dig out every time you think you want him back – that cruel existence when he’s too fed up to speak and the venomous words he thinks he can speak to you. Now, you have more material to hate him with. 

However, he does leave you alone for a few hours. It’s wholly welcomed – you’re able to get ahead in some work you’d have to finish tomorrow, kicked up with your laptop on your knees in bed. You have the windows wide open, using the sun as your clock to measure the time before you’d have to take a shower and resort to bed. 

Sometime before the sun fully sets, you can hear Satoru move about the hallway and inevitably shut and lock the front door behind him. You take that time to sit up in bed, rubbing your skin raw in the shower in less than five minutes, and melt into the couch with your current read tucked under your arm. Freedom like this in the space you developed is so serene and exactly what you needed. Satoru never lit candles, so when you sat up to light them, the wick crackled with unuse. Lighting fills the air – the softness of lavender spinning from the smoke like ribbons you can’t make out with the naked eye. 

You’re only wearing socks, wrapped in loose linen shorts and a patterned sleep top that leaves little to the imagination. Not wearing undergarments to sleep is just routine – you don’t know why you feel so naked under the soft, golden light. Perhaps it's the fact that Satoru is due to arrive at any moment. You couldn’t check his location, but when that lock clicks, you’ll be running back to the bedroom with the linger of your smell clinging onto the furniture. 

Or, maybe you wouldn’t run. Maybe you’d eat with Satoru and not pull away when his hand slips—your core trembles at the thought. You quickly open your book to will those thoughts away. 

When that dreaded lock clicks, you’re flying up from your spot, book slamming and heart racing. You have every mind to run for the hills – to curl up on yourself and will the night away with dreams, but you don’t move. You’re too late. That’s what you tell yourself. 

Satoru is slinking back into the apartment, wearing a dark hat over his hair and glasses hanging from the front of his shirt, which he pulls off and places next to his paper bag of takeout. He notices your head over the back of the couch, smiling softly when you turn to him with an unreadable look on your face. 

“I got Thai food, I know it’s one of your favorites.” 

You don’t respond. His smile fades into grey. 

“Food from Thailand-” He starts, unveiling the carry-out boxes hidden in their outer packaging. There’s a separate plastic bag he unveils, setting it next to it. “-And drinks from Japan. I got cold green tea – your favorite.” 

“I’m not hungry for anything provided by you, unfortunately.” 

“Unfortunately?” He scoffs, eyebrow raised as he moves about the kitchen, not bothering to plate the food, but opting for real chopsticks. It’s a stainless steel pair you got for his birthday – his favorite. “Don’t be hard-headed. Come and eat this.” 

You stare at him blankly, blinking once before turning back to your book. In your rush, you absolutely lost your page, and it was one of your final straws. You can feel the frustration start to build in your bones. 

Satoru closes in on you from behind, gaping mouth and disheveled, hatless hair everywhere as he takes a noisy bite of his rice noodles. He crunches on his broccoli in that savage way you despise, exhaling loudly as he slams into the couch next to you. 

Pulling your limbs close and turning your nose up at him, you scoot to the edge, begging for distraction from the words you’ve already read in front of you. You still couldn’t find your page. 

“Don’t be like that.” He mutters around a bite, manners completely thrown out the window when he’s next to you. 

“How about you don’t be like that.” 

“Like what? Cold? Cause that’s what you’re being.” Two seconds after his last, Toru shovels another loaded bite into his mouth, chewing quickly. “I like that sleep set on you. Reminds me of our first anniversary.” 

Satoru can never be vague – the entire idea is lost on him. It wasn’t in your head when you pulled this set out of your bag; it’s just what you packed to sleep in. Your options are so limited, and now you feel like you can’t run from them. 

“Close your eyes, then.” You cross your knees, trying to shrink yourself further so you don’t fall victim to his man-spread. He’s taking over the couch with his long limbs like he always has. Years ago, you didn’t care because it was just an excuse to be touching him all the time. Now, you’re running from it. 

Caving and leaning forward to put his meal down, he gives you a look over his shoulder – one that pulls your attention from the turn of a new chapter. “Don’t be like that,” he repeats, then his knee bumps your thigh. You suck in a breath. 

It feels like the end closing in again – dreaded but so familiar. 

Satoru blinks once, then licks over his lips. Your finger twitches as it washes over you again. 

Then, he turns around, wrapping a thick hand over your throat. You react with claws, reaching up to tug at his wrist. He’s not being gentle – your breathing is uneven and scared. Knees pressing to the couch to crowd you, Toru lets your book tumble off your lap when he pins you down. 

Your hands are shaking, eyes screwed shut, but completely unable to speak. He’s got you so vulnerable like always – reduced to a thing manufactured for his pleasure who would never, ever say no. 

After all, what’s a man to do? This was customary during the marriage, and if you’re willing to give it, Toru is more than willing to take it. He can read you well enough to know this is what you need – him. 

As he crawls over you, both knees pressed close to your thighs, his weight shifts back, and your legs quiver. He’s got your arms tied up, legs pinned, and body becoming one with the cushions. If you’d look, you’d see the tent in his grey sweatpants standing at full attention as he dominates you into wordless, fightless putty. 

You only need one more thing to seal the deal – that mature, deep, reassuring voice scorching you like fire on mealy stones. 

“Gonna give it to me?” He whispers, free fingers pushing through his lips into the warmth of his mouth. He’s wetting them over, unsure what to expect when he dips his hand into your shorts. Your eyes are squeezed shut, and that’s as good a sign as any to let him know you wouldn’t be an overactive sprinkler system down there. 

You don’t answer him right away – those two fingers twirl around his digits like he’s making out with them. 

Under this dull, shadowed light, you crack open your eyes and die at the sight hovering over you. 

Toru’s light hair hanging over his blinding eyes, the way the shadows dip in the sucked hollows of his cheeks and bounces off the strength in his hand. A small, silver bracelet rolls down his arm, hanging from pale skin so delicately that your insides tremble and shake. 

You squeeze them shut again. “Oh, my God.” 

“Well, Gojo, I’m not God.” He mutters, wet fingers falling from his lips. He trails them down past your waistline, using his instincts to push them right to your warm, waiting cunt. Easing you apart, he raises an eyebrow at the slickness that pools around his fingers, but his heart is pounding. You’re wet for him – growing wetter by the second, and he’s drinking it up like a greedy child, tongue darting over his lips again. “But it feels like you want it.” 

“Don’t wanna talk-

“Well, I do-” He cuts you off with a bite of his tongue. He gives you no warning, but you can feel his fingers start to slip lower, completely disregarding your pleasure and focusing on intrusion. Your breath picks up when his fingers slip inside. “-Wanna talk about it. It’s impossible to get off when you’re keeping your filthy mouth shut.” Punctuating his point, that finger inside of you curls mean against your shivering walls, hooking you like prey. 

“Ugh – God, Satoru.” 

“Yeah, let me hear it.” He eggs you on with a deep voice, sliding another finger inside of you. He waits a moment, grip tightening uncomfortably over your neck, before he’s fucking you on them – no mercy. He’s not tender with anything anymore. “God, Satoru, Jo, Toru, Gojo – I don’t care. Just say my name.” 

“Ugh – I hate you.” 

He leans down, lips hovering over yours as you slowly blink your eyes open. It’s startling… looking right into his pearlescent gaze, but it's so familiar that you could die. Then, he kisses you like everything is okay. You kiss him back. 

“I love you – Mm, I love you, baby.” He’s rejoicing on your lips, the lines between marriage and separation blurring in his hazed mind. “Love when we fight ‘cause it shows that you still care.” 

“Higher… H-higher, I wanna com-

“No, it has to be on my cock.” He cuts you off with little thought, thumb only barely lifting to ghost across your shivering wet clit. It shocks you from the blood, back arching painfully over the soft couch. “Just wanted to get you wet for me first.” 

If it were anybody else, you’d be cringing with the language Toru so easily lets melt off his tongue, but it drives you deeper. His hand on your throat – his voice in your ear. Yeah, this is why you married him. It’s just too good. 

You want more. 

“Then give it to me.” You growl, finally ready to be his again. You’re ready to hear your old pet names – you’d be good enough to hear them. If he just keeps this up… if he lowers you deep enough, then pulls you back up for air, you’re sure it’d be the one thing that reels you back. 

“Fuck – I love you. I love that I can hate you. I love that I can love you. I love that I can fuck you.” He sits up, face flushed from your presence. His thumb is back at his lips, studying the taste of your chapstick on his tongue. He looks so manic, like he’s entirely taken with your dark expression. 

Finally, that hand around your throat unravels, and you’re taking a deep, reassuring breath. “Don’t say that. Not right now.” 

“No, I know you want it hard.” He mentions if it was a fact, like he knows how repressed you are from a too-sweet marriage. The main thing Satoru adopted when you took his surname, was the absolute definition of love and gentleness. During sex, he never squeezed you too hard. During arguments, he’d nod and let you win. There is something there – something that drove that part of love out of your life. You’re just too blind to see it. 

“You don’t have to say it, I know you feel ashamed.” 

“C-can you just…” 

“Can I what?” 

“Get on with it.” You whine, hips bucking up into his pelvis. He loves trapping you like this, chests kissing when you take a deep enough breath. “I don’t want— don’t wanna talk about it.” 

His hand closes around the underside of your jaw, yanking your head to force eye contact. You’re like a puppet – pliable and jelly in his grip. You can’t fight back against his strength. 

“You don’t get to rush this. Not like before.” His voice simmers out, getting lost in his chest all gravelly and hard. His fingers dig into your jawline, leaving wells against the sensitive muscle. Your face twitches, eyes shut and burning. 

Then, he slaps you for some reason – on the face. 

Your lips part, eyes flying open as you suck in a breath. Your body is rolling under him, shivering with generational need for him to bury himself inside of you. “Ohh, God. Toru–

“Knew you’d like that–” another slap. You bare your teeth. “-Fucking shameless.” 

“D-don’t wanna hurt,” 

“Ye, you do.” He slaps you the other way, gentler on his backhand but strong enough to leave a sting. You’re wiggling from his grasp – his hot fingers tighten. “You were shaking in the car when I was demeaning you. You know, that’s what I was doing – demeaning you just like you do to yourself. If it didn’t feel good, you’d have burned my number the second you left.” 

“S-so mean…” 

“Didn’t mean all of it, but I meant most of it.” He leans real close again like he’s trying to push words into your gasping mouth. “Respect is earned, lust is given. You’ve gotta give it to me really good for me to even glance at you outside of these walls again.” 

Toru sits up, letting you free as both hands work at his waistband. He’s not stalling, and he’s so hard that his cock whips out with one tug at the crotch. He hisses as cool air hits too-hot skin. “Tell me what you told Mama, baby. ‘Toru is so cold, he ignores me’? What about, ‘He watches my every move, even my bank account’?” 

You don’t really understand what he’s trying to say; all you’re focused on is the pure, shiny white pearl falling over his fist as he works himself in front of you. You’re trying to look him in the eye – his shirt is between his teeth, now. He’s the perfect reflection of the lust you keep buried deep inside of you. 

“Bet you didn’t tell her about how I peeled the underwear from your skin and sucked them clean right in front of you on our wedding night,” his neck tenses as pleasure builds white-hot in the core of his hard body. “Or how I obsessed over that green tea you told me you liked on our first date – the green tea sitting in that bag over there you didn’t touch. Remember how I wiped the shelves of it and surprised you with a fully packed fridge? Or your ring, I had resized six times just because it kept falling off during sex, and I’d have to stop and put it back on? Hm… there’s that time I missed finals because I was hungover in a hotel room with you in Shibuya. The last time I drank, I drank for you.” 

You’re crying now. It’s a feeling you’re used to – crying at the thought of him and everything he’s done. The ring now sits beautifully on your finger. It’s so embedded into your being that you don’t notice you haven’t taken it off. 

“Yeah, how can you ignore that? It’s true love, I don’t care what made you run so afraid, but my love never faltered.” 

“If that’s all you want to see, fine.” The tears are making you angry – you’re frustrated by the build-up, horny and tense. Your face burns from his palms. “But I see the times you purposefully didn’t make me finish, how you told your family I was crazy for not wanting them to comment on my body, and the weeks of silence you gave me after.” 

“Insignificant things, sure.” 

“You’re not denying it.” 

“Because I did it, so what?” Toru’s starting to get himself there – scarily close to finishing from the flustered sound of your voice and the quickness of his fist. He quirks his neck, finally pulling open his eyes. “Ugh – what about when you told your friends how I wasn’t good in bed? The same friends I have to see every day?” 

“None of my friends are going to stroke your ego. You don’t like how I describe you? Fix it.” 

That cold look in his eyes burns as he hoists your hips up with one arm. There’s no real way to fuck you comfortably like this, so he’ll maximize his own pleasure, knowing you’ll cry and come for him at the drop of a coin, and the pain will only make you hotter. 

One long leg swings over the side of the couch, foot planted just the way he needs to keep his balance as he watches his cock disappear inside of you. You’re stretching so filthily around him – opening up to everything he has to give. You’re already blooming that delicious pink-red shade he loves so much. He’s so focused on the sight that he doesn’t notice the line of drool that slips from his shiny lips. 

“Put me down– this angle.” You’re whining, fingertips digging into the side and back of the couch like you’re trying to run away. He has your body pressed in a sick seventy-degree angle, your thighs burning and singing with pain at the awkwardness. 

“-is so hot, I know.” Satoru throws his head back when he’s buried all the way inside of you. He focused on this feeling right now – filing it away as one of his favorites. He feels so safe and surrounded like this – loved from the core of his being, even when you’re deadset against him. “Baby, you’re so flexible.” 

You’re sweating now, tears sliding hotter down your flushed cheeks. He’s rolling his hips, staring off into space as he brushes your cervix. Your hand flies up to push at his chest – you fall short. “S-stop! God, you know I hate that.” 

Toru finally looks down at you, gaze sparkling in turquoise hues as he watches you flail for mercy. “Feel good?” He rolls his hips again, breathing so delicately like he’s in heaven. “You’re so wet. Gonna make you feel me tomorrow.” 

It’s the last thing he truly says to you before pulling out halfway – mind on a mission as he fucks you so hard you’re seeing stars. All the blood is rushing to your heart and head – eyes rolled back like you’re on the verge of death as his thrusts send you deeper and deeper. He’s pushing you into the cracks of the couch, uncaring of how your neck is straining and face reddening. He’s fucking you with his eyes shut – perhaps imagining someone else, yet hopelessly in love with you. 

Your body is trembling as he continues the assault on your poor cervix – his eye twitching every time he slams into that soft little barrier. 

Toru has a sad affinity for this – being so deep inside of you that if he were any deeper, he’d be playing in your womb. He’s so obsessed with your body – he can’t help it. He loves your taste, and the way you sound, look, and feel. Every one of his five senses is wholly devoted to you, and still, you found a reason to leave him. 

He lays you down so well every night, and still you tell your friends he can’t make you come… To him, it sounds like a personal problem. He won’t let you fuck with him like that – not again. He’ll just fuck the devotion right back into you as hard as he can. 

Toru’s sweating now, too. It’s dripping off the hair sticking to his forehead – hips moving so fast they’re blurred with speed to the naked eye. Combined wetness makes those lewd squelches so much louder, and you’re deafened by your own desire. 

Sanity is starting to slip away from you. Satoru notices immediately. You’re not tearing at the couch as hard as you usually would – your grip falls loose. 

“Look at me, beautiful. Look at how well you’re taking me.” He grunts, taking breaths between each deep word. His voice is so lost – so wrecked, and it wrecks you. A whine punches from your throat. 

Toru gulps and starts again. “Hey, c’mon. Gonna be a good girl and stay with me?” 

“Too- It’s too-

“Shh, shh… Don’t talk, honey. Let me take care of you.” It might be a bad idea, but Toru has you completely mindless. He reaches for your clit and pinches it whisper-soft between his thick fingers just to elicit a different reaction from you. He smiles when your eyes fly open. Your whines are the only thing he can hear. “Do you know how good you feel – how good you’re making me feel?” 

“Mm, yeah. T-tell me.” 

“It’s so hot.” He starts. Moving both big hands to your waist when you start to slip. The sweat against your silk, all streaky and stained, is so slippery, Toru wishes he can rip it off. “You’re squeezing me so tight, it feels like home – God, it’s just so hot.” 

You’re crying even harder if that’s possible. The onslaught of his deep, precious voice during this rush of physical and mental stimulation is just too much. It feels like you love him so much – like you want to open up and give him babies, be his forever, but you can’t. 

You’re not even his anymore. 

Then it hits you like a cruel joke without a punchline – your orgasm, right to the face. 

At that very moment, all life is pushed from your bones. You go completely limp in Toru’s grip, dragging him down like dead weight. He scrambles, letting your hips fall as your body shakes and seizes with release. 

It’s never hit you this hard before. It’s never come to you so unexpectedly. 

You’re obsessed. 

“Oh, my God… Shit, you should see your face.” Satoru’s voice carries you through the mindlessness. He’s sitting between your thighs, pulling his leg behind him to finish you off in missionary. Your legs are too weak – they fall open and expose you like you’re a prize to be bid on. “So pretty… So beautiful; my perfect wife.”

“N-

“Yeah, I’m gonna cum so fucking hard. It’s coming – shit, ah-

Toru can only roll his hips because the expression of pure mindlessness you’re making is better than the ruthless way he’s screwing you. Seeing your strict demeanor crumble and burn with the feeling of him makes him so fucking cocky. He knows you now – has never seen this before, but will do anything to see it again. 

When he comes, he buries his face in your neck, getting drunk off your scent as he ruts into you weakly. He can feel himself flood and pool around his cock – leaving a sickly, shiny layer on him once he pulls out. It falls limp against your thigh, and for a moment, Satoru collapses into you. He holds you like a prize. 

You two must’ve stayed like that for hours – days have passed in your mind. You’re not worried about his crushing weight or his soft breath; you’re worried about what your friends will think when you tell them Satoru just gave me the best sex of my life. 

Shoko will laugh – Utahime will take pity. Yeah, you have to tell them. 

When he’s finally sitting up, it feels like your skin is being pulled from your body. You two are interconnected; he has to sit up slowly so your soul doesn’t detach, too. His hair is a mess – it’s the first thing you see when you creak open your eyes, feeling high off of something you couldn’t pinpoint. Maybe it was him – how you couldn’t get enough of that savory, sex-filled scent that wafts off his godly body and settles in your skin. 

This feeling —lost in a rose-colored daze —feels like love. 

“If you can sit up, I’ll grab you some tea.” He sits back, sliding his pants over his filthy skin. Of course, he has plans to shower later, but he’s hungry. That always comes first. “You want some Pad See Ew, baby?” 

“Don’t call me that.” 

He rolls his eyes, and finally, you two feel like yourselves again. You’re rolling over on your side, positioning your shorts back over the mess between your thighs – shoving your chest back in its constraints. 

“Will you cut it loose? You know how hard I just made you come? I swear, you saw Jesus.” 

“Shut up.” You bite. “No, I didn’t.” 

Satoru sucks his teeth, kicking his legs back up as he takes his cool noodles back in his grip. He’s eating like nothing just transpired – hair sticky with sweat, come drying on his skin. You feel just as dirty, and when you move to kick your feet off the edge of the couch, your core cramps and tightens. Your hands fly there to cradle it. 

“Ah- fuck.” 

“You okay?” 

“No!” You snap, overcome, and pissed because you told him you didn’t like when he targeted your cervix like that. It didn’t take a genius to know it’d be bruised for these next few days. “I don’t know if you know, Satoru, but you can’t fuck yourself into my womb, so you need to stop trying.” 

You’re not trying to be funny, but Toru chokes on his food with a laugh. He’s coughing – laughing. You’re glaring. 

“But I know it’s so warm and safe in there, baby.” He sighs, pushing your overwhelming strictness off his shoulders like he always has. Yes, he knows about your cervix aversion. No, he wouldn’t fuck you halfway – there’s no point. He needs to be buried inside of you, all the way to the hilt, or it’d kill him. 

“You have no respect.” 

“I don’t.” He mumbles, taking another bite once his breath evens out. Sharp canines scrape against pristine metal. You glance over at his striking side profile. “But seeing you so beautiful and willing to let go like that might be bringing some back.” 

“How about you keep it?” You’re trying so hard not to let him in again – so hard. His voice is sweet like honey, and his movements are endearing, but you know it’s that post-sex ovulation-thick way your thoughts twist and twirl everything into something it’s not. You can only hope that the feeling of absolute detachment you experienced a month ago will return and bring you to your senses, as Satoru did. 

Unfortunately, you’re leaning into his strong frame when he fishes for a vegetable-heavy bite for you, mentioning, “Open wide.” As he pushes it between your lips. 

Sauce dribbles across them; Toru reaches to wipe it away, then leans in to lick them clean. 

That lick turns into a kiss – his hand pressed to the side of your head, chopsticks digging into your hair as his tongue licks forward into your mouth. He wants something else out of you now – your devotion. Perhaps that umami taste on your tongue that he’s so addicted to. Either way, you’re making out with him like you love him, and that’s all he could ever ask for. 

Toru is just so in awe of how sexy and mindless you look right now. He wants to make a mess of you again. “On a scale of one to go rot in Hell, pervert – how pissed would you be if I said I was hard for you again?” He whispers against your lips, serious as hell, but moreso focused on never letting up on yours. 

“Go rot in Hell, pervert.” 

Midnight has ticked by – forgotten takeout containers litter the table. You’re standing in the dark, legs trembling in the shower as the throbbing in your stomach makes it hard to keep steady. 

You’ve been here many times before, losing your mind against the rush of clear water. Moments like these give you time to think – to want, to yearn. 

Now, you’re yearning for Satoru. 

You want him to bust the door open and press his naked, wet body into yours until you become him. You want his hair in your mouth – his blood on your skin, his touch on your bare, shivering flesh. No skin, no boundaries. 

Your shame spans countries – continents. You hate yourself. 

Reaching between your thighs, you cup your hand against your core, absorbing the flaky traces of him before the water washes them away. Once, it was so thick – so soft against the heat of your legs. Then, it felt like lava pouring into your soul. Now, Toru’s old finish feels like a stain on your skin. You sigh. 

Satoru loves showering with you, so it doesn’t take him long to come slinking in, welcome as ever. He’s still wearing those tired, terribly attractive grey sweatpants, hair wild from constantly running fingers through it. The sweat’s got the strands sitting on a different gravitational field – they’re everywhere. 

“You can tell me to go die, but I swear it’s just gonna make me stay longer.” He whispers, stepping inside with you like he always has. This is such a familiar maneuver – so familiar it makes you smile. His hand on your wet shoulder, his toned stomach melting into your back. You sigh against him, nodding slowly. 

You don’t know what to say. “Hi.” You reply, rolling your head back on his sturdiness. Toru breathes out a short laugh. 

“Hi, my love.” He kisses the top of your head, taking this moment as his. Nothing can ruin this right now. 

One more kiss – a few seconds to linger, then he turns you around. His hands trap your arms, and his tall reflection feels like home as he gazes down at you. You’re being stared down like headlights in the dark – blinding and cruel. You blink up at him. 

One arm falls, reaching between your pressed bodies, and your thighs part as they know. Except his fingers concentrate under your belly button, smoothing out before pressing softly. You suck in a breath. 

“It feels good to leave my mark like that, though it hurts you.” He’s mumbling, so the mood isn’t lost or twisted. Satoru is in here because he knows one more round will do him in perfectly. So, he pushes you to your knees, keeping his arm strong and stiff to guide you as you fall. 

You do so without saying a word, ignoring the singing in your pelvis and the shame on your cheeks. He knows what he wants – you know what he wants, so you don’t waste time. 

Rescinding all control, you lean forward and press your lips to his heavy-hanging cock, breath so hot and painful in your throat. His thighs smell like him – the tuft of hair around him being the absolute goldmine of his body. A beautiful head of hair falling into a gorgeous face, body, and crotch – all dripping like a waterfall to his long fingers, strong legs, and wide feet. Every part of him was crafted with so much care and precision; it’s your job to worship it. 

Satoru reaches down, grabbing his cock by the base. He palms it to the side, letting it linger on his thigh as he presses your face to the swell of his sack. You whine, tongue darting out to catch the water that streams against the soft skin. Satoru tastes so much like himself as you suffocate between his legs, but it’s a taste so salty and loving that if you could bottle it for a high, you would.

He holds you close for a moment, letting you kiss and lick at him like a needy kitten. His thick fingers trail across your chin, sending down little breaths and moans to make your blood hotter. You reach up and bury your fingertips in his thighs. 

Satoru pushes you away once he’s hard enough. His blood is rushing again, thick cock painted in a hue of crimson. It almost matches the palm of his hands – as soft as them, too. Shiny and pink like his lips. 

“Open your mouth.” He demands.

You do. 

Water attacks your gaze when you try to open your eyes, but he notices and shifts just for you, letting the water pelt his shoulder blades. With a curl of the lip – a suck of the cheek, he gathers spit on his tongue and lets it fall right into your waiting mouth. 

Your lips snap shut. His cock eases against your jaw, sliding delicately across your wet skin. He pushes your head back, water falling on your skin as he rubs his length over your cheek, brushing your nose, poking at your eyelid. 

He’s guiding himself with his thumb, making sure he’s pressed close enough to feel something. The rest of his fingers tangle in the hair behind your ear, caressing you like a porcelain doll. 

Satoru knows he has you again. It’s a feeling he can’t see but can pinpoint in the darkest of hallways. It’s the sound of your voice – your obedience, your care for his jokes. He knows. 

You’re right back where he wants you. 

At the end of the night, you crawl into his bed. All the lights are off, and the bathroom door is cracked – soft light from your shower spilling into the void. You think Satoru is asleep on his side of the bed – his soft snoring is familiar. 

You’re half asleep, throat on fire, stomach in knots when you crawl over him. 

Your knee presses into his side, body sliding over his arms as you make your way. He ruined your set, and now you’re wearing his clothes to bed. You don’t mind. Satoru surely doesn’t mind when he blinks awake, and it’s the only thing he sees. 

You settle against his back, slipping an arm under him – winding one over his broad shoulder. He’s the little spoon, rolling back into the touch like he’s never been without it. You used to hold him like this when you called him your husband, sneaking little ear kisses and wandering fingertips as the night dragged on. 

Now, he knows you’re awake. He’s awake. 

His voice hits so genuinely, you think it might kill you. “We don’t have to be married if you don’t want to be… but I think we’re good enough to start over.” 

“Satoru…” You whisper, voice broken with the ghost of him scrubbing your throat raw. “I’m scared.” 

“So am I, but it’s a good feeling.” He reassures, giving you that sweet, low voice he knows you can’t say no to. “If this weightlessness isn’t gone by tomorrow, we’ll know, and I’ll give you your divorce.” 

It’s been a week since you’ve been moved into your apartment. You and Satoru have had sex two more times since that night, but you two don’t bring up the obvious. 

You’re staring in the floor-length bedroom mirror, fingers at the blouse you’re buttoning to your skin. Like always — it’s your friend's idea. You’re impartial to karaoke, but they’re desperate to see you again, chalking up the weekend outing to a housewarming. 

It’s been too many times that you’ve blown them off; now you have to show up. 

You straighten out your hair in the reflection, avoiding your eyes and the darkness that just won’t fade. Your phone rings — exercising bad habits, you reach for your side table to answer it without checking the caller. 

“Hello?” 

Your mom is on the other line — her voice is warm. ‘Hi, dear. We haven’t heard from you since you visited. How’s Tokyo?’

You sigh, stepping back to sit on the edge of your bed. “Um… I know. It’s just been a lot. Tokyo is good… It’s good for me to be back here.” 

‘Settling into your new place, still?’

“Unfortunately.” You’re ripe with shame for some reason, fingers twisting in the strings hanging from your thin skirt. “Had a friend help me move the last of my new furniture today. It’s good to actually have stuff.” 

She hums — you know she wants to say more. ‘And… is it okay if I ask about him?’ 

You close your eyes, the sound of her gentle voice making you cry only the way a mother can. “Satoru? Mhm. I put in for divorce yesterday. Just waiting on the proceedings to be shipped to me.” 

‘That’s good. I’m proud of you for taking that step. I know it’s hard.’

“Really, really hard.” You’re crying now, unable to hide the sound of it in your voice. Over the line, she hears, giving you a sad little hum. You feel so pathetic - reaching up to cover your eyes to hide from yourself. “Mama, I’m so scared.” 

‘Darling, you have no idea just how strong you are and just how strong I think you are. No matter your reasons for leaving, I understand and support them. Satoru was an important person in your life — there’s no doubt about it, but even the closest of relationships aren’t meant to last forever. God has something better for you, you know that.’ 

“Have you ever felt like this? Like you’re standing so close to the edge, but you just… can’t?” 

‘Well, what made you leave him?’ 

Your throat clicks, stopping the words before they’re even thought of. If you cared, you’d give her a laundry list right now, but you can’t. “I- I can’t. I’m ashamed.” 

That’s all you need to tell her. It clicks. ‘It’s not the sex, is it? Dear, if you’re not satisfied, have you told him?’ 

“It’s-” You pull the phone from your ear, chest tightening as tears rush. “It’s not that, it’s the opposite. We can’t stay away from each other.” 

‘Oh,’ she pauses, unsure of where to step. You two always had a good enough relationship to talk about these things, but the conversations were few and far between. You hardly talk about Satoru when you're at home, which is why the divorce doesn’t surprise her. ‘How many times… have you two been together since the split?’

“Four or five times.” You’re beet red in shame, sniffling into your hands as you try to muster up words. “It’s so bad, I know.” 

‘Nobody can blame you for going back to what you know. After so long with your father, I don’t even know if there’s a man out there who can even make me feel anything anymore. You’ve been with Satoru for years — he’s all you know. Don’t feel guilty.’ 

“Thank you.” You cry, snotting into your hand, ruining the makeup you painted so precisely just minutes ago. “It’s just – the sex is good, but everything else is so terrible with him.” 

‘Then, you’re making the right decision. Trust it.’ She pauses for a moment, offering you the rustle of movement to fill the silence. ‘I don’t dare overstep, but if all he can offer you is pleasure, why don’t you just find another outlet?’ 

“What do you mean?” 

‘Going to the gym regularly could help you balance out some of that need. Or, you could derive pleasure from other sources. I know it won’t be the same, but toy-

“Mom.” 

‘I know – you don’t want to hear it from me.’ 

“No, I don’t.” 

‘Then pretend like I’m a friend.’ She doubles down, evening out her voice as she repeats. ‘It won’t kill you to just try. It can’t be worse than going back to him, can it?’ 

And that’s what you tell yourself as you crawl back in bed, breath heavy and hot in your lungs. The conversation ended long ago – you had to sit with yourself for a bit afterward, letting her wisdom set you straight. It feels better to know that you’re not a touch-starved slut, and it makes sense that you keep going back because it’s all you know. Change is uncomfortable. That’s what she left you with.

Now, you’re lying on your back against the rustle of sheets, staring at the ceiling, trying to work up the nerve. Proudly, you don’t own any sex toys – your husband was a walking one with a voice and touch that drove you mad. It’s what you’re trying to lose as you part your knees, hand reaching down to pull your panties to the side. Under your skirt, it’s so easy to get where you need to go – Satoru always loved you in them, and always found the perfect excuse to be under it come nightfall. 

You’re thinking about one of those nights – skin to skin, your voice melting off of his tongue as you slowly approach your core. Your fingers concentrate at your slit, completely bone-dry save for naturality. You breathe out a soft breath, working up the nerve to dip your finger a little closer to your most sensitive area. 

You can’t find the nerve. 

“Fuck.” You bite, angry at yourself as you hesitate. Time moves slowly suspended at this moment, and when you slip your eyes shut, all you can see is his gaze – that cheeky little wink he sends you when he’s propped between your legs. You’re combing back to remember his taste – his touch, the way he loves. It makes your heart skip a beat in anticipation. 

“Toru… Toru – mm…” You whisper, gasping when your fingers slide over your clit, making your back arch embarrassingly. “Please, Satoru – right there.” 

You feel so pathetic, but it feels so good. Too good. 

Just not enough. 

You work your smaller fingers in messy, quick circles against your bud – just trying to get yourself off so you can have a level head tonight with karaoke. It’s shameful just to admit how much you get from being intimate with Toru – it’s a way to lose your mind, like a high from a drug that costs way too much. 

You’re trying to mimic his deep tone in your head, whispering how good and beautiful you are. Your hand quivers as you bring it to your neck, hoping the soft squeeze will be enough to emulate Satoru’s affinity for squeezing you there. It works, if even for a second. Then, you’re scrambling for your phone, remembering the one video he sent you two years ago. You were in Tokyo, and he was in Kyoto – he missed you and recorded a video of himself in bed, vocalizing just how much he did. 

That tone – that adoration. It’s what you need. 

So you’re swiping manically through your camera roll, one hand frozen between your thighs as you search and comb the archive. 

Finally. You’ve never clicked on anything so fast. 

As you click the video to start, you push your head back into the pillows, working your fingers at your clit like you’d die if you stopped. 

God, his voice. 

‘Hi, baby. Just got to my room… It’s so big and lonely without you here… I know you’re gonna shake your head and think ‘God, he’s so dramatic.’ like you always do, but I miss you. If a man is dramatic for missing his wife, then lock me up and throw away the key because I'll be in jail for a long, long time… I wish I can touch you right now. Wish you were here so I can tell you all about my day – you’ll tell me about yours… then we’ll make the sweetest love… look, see how soft this bed is? You’d sink right in, love. I’d have to dive in and pull you up for air, haha… Anyways, I know you don’t like when I talk too much about nothing, but I really do miss you. Work trips are the worst. Well, I love you. So, so, so much. Alright baby, good night…’ 

He kisses the phone, and the video goes dark. 

You’re close, leaning over to bite the pillow in a sad attempt to muffle your overwhelmed sobs. In a few swipes, the video is replaying, and as soon as that deep laugh licks the line, you’re convulsing and coming all over your fingers. 

When you’re sitting in the dark blue light in the private karaoke room, you feel lighter, yet so guilty with shame. It’s only been twenty minutes, but you’re three drinks and two shitty pop songs deep. Now, you, Shoko, and Utahime are listening to the machine run – letting the choppy backing track carry the silence when one of you stops talking to take a sip. 

Shoko’s at your left, leg pressed to your bare one, blinding white screen cutting through the darkness as she feverishly texts someone back. When you lean over to ingest her business, you see Suguru’s name. Your heart flips. 

Clutching your glass like it’s a stress ball, you sit up so fast your head is spinning. “Please tell me you didn’t invite him.” 

Shoko scoffs, not even looking at you as she sends Suguru an “okay” message. “What? Of course, I invited him, who do you think’s gonna buy the drinks?” 

“Okay, but you know he’s going to bring Satoru – Shoko, I’m gonna fre-

“I told him not to invite Gojo. Chill – it’s fine. They’re walking up now, I think. He’s just bringing Yu instead.” 

You huff, sitting back with the mind to trust her. You can’t win against an angry or annoyed Shoko – never. Not even when she’s tipsy, and you’re drunk. You actually don’t want to fight at all because you know you’d curl into a ball and call a truce. 

The fact that Suguru is just bringing Yu is a red flag – he went to school with them before you even met. If there’s one, there’s always the other. It’s suffocating trying to leave someone so integral to your friend group. 

You didn’t notice exactly when Utahime ducked out of the room, so you’re loopy and surprised when she peeks her head through the door, smiling softly, eyes shut. “Shoko-

“What?” 

Utahime opens her eyes to glance at you, then tugs at her lips as she circles back to Shoko. “I have a situation. Can you… come on?” 

“Whatever.” 

They leave you alone like it’s nothing, but you’re thankful for the loneliness. You didn’t even want to come out tonight; you thought the orgasm would help, but the conversation you had with your mother hung over your head like a dark cloud. You feel so lifeless – like joy falls onto your soul just to shrivel up and die. 

Utahime makes sure that the door is shut – she’ll keep an eye on it, too, but she’s panicking right now. There’s nobody in the world who has ivory-white hair, sticking out of the crowd like a sore thumb. It’s a weekend – the bar is thick with bodies, and Satoru stands tall amongst the crowd at the edge of the room, drawing attention. 

Utahime leaps into damage control, waving her hands in front of Shoko like it’d simmer her down before she starts. “Look, I don’t know where Haibara and Geto are–

 “Shit, is that Gojo-

She springs into action, Utahime right on her tail.“-wait! Shoko, look-

-no, I’m killing him.” Shoko would never let anyone see how flustered she was, but she knew this was going to happen. If Suguru didn’t tell Satoru he’d be here, it was surely Yu. She knows you or Utahime aren’t responsible. “Killing all of those fuckers – God, I hate them.” 

Just before Utahime and Shoko can close in on him, Satoru’s attention is pulled to his phone, then the pushing bodies moving through the door. Suguru and Yu are shoulder-to-shoulder, laughing at a joke carried over from the walk here. They don’t see each other often – not with Yu’s secretive job on the outskirts of the city he can’t tell anyone about. Suguru told you it was government work, and Satoru told you he worked for a tech company. They’re both liars, but Yu is sweet enough to overlook the grey matter. He’s been around for years. 

“You. Dumb, Dumber, and Dumbest, come here.” Shoko points to each of them respectively, barreling into protector mode to shield your bleeding heart just a few rooms away. She didn’t want to see your face when you saw Gojo, but she also didn’t want to be proven a liar. 

“Hey, Shoko!” Yu tries, unfamiliar with seeing her painted in dark makeup but in love with the reflection. He just thinks she’s great, albeit a little strict. It’s why you two get along so well. “Utahime!” 

“To be clear, you’re ‘dumber.’” Shoko completely barrels past his sunny persona, letting Satoru pick it up when he looks his way. She targets Suguru, grabbing at his baggy sleeve to drag him away for a second. Utahime is quick to start damage control, leaning in to hug Yu and exchange pleasantries with Satoru. It’s hard to hide what she thinks about him when he’s so close – after everything you said about him, too. 

Suguru isn’t even surprised, but he does pull Shoko’s small hand from the expensive fabric, frowning against the flickering blue lights. Everyone’s gaze is shadowed – terribly sung music is ringing in their ears. “I didn’t invite him!” 

“I don’t care! Kick him to the fucking street!” 

“Dude, you’re drunk. Whatever, they’re cordial.” 

“Because she’s actively trying to stay away from him – ugh.” She grunts, disgusted to her core and so flustered she’s tripping over her own feet. Suguru is a lost cause; he’s too nonchalant and sweet. She needed to poke the target – the only man wearing sunglasses in a bar. “You.” She states, pointing a finger right into Satoru’s chest. 

He steps back, feigning ignorance. “Hey-

“Leave – I’m so serious.” 

He’s laughing – of course, he doesn’t think this is serious. “Why would I leave? Come on. Don’t be like that.” 

“Oh, my God, I’m going to kill you!” 

“Shoko–” Utahime steps back in, cheeks all red with flush. Poor Yu has no idea what’s happening – he doesn’t think he even wants to know. 

“You’re gonna kill me? Me?” Satoru’s challenging her; it’s just in his obscure nature. He thinks she looks like a feral kitten, with fluffy hair and a razor-thin gaze. “What’d I do?” 

“Why couldn’t you have just kept your stupid mouth shut?! We wouldn’t be in this situation.” 

“What situation? My divorce?” 

“What divorce?!” Yu stands shellshocked, looking at Suguru, who is chuckling under his breath, then to Utahime, who looks like she just wants to run and hide. He can’t blame her – these two are scary when they’re mad. 

“His!” 

“Mine!” They belt at the same time, emotions running hot without care. 

Then, it’s like something supernatural clicks. Satoru stands up straight, taking a tentative step back. “She… she’s here?” 

“Who fucking cares?!” 

Satoru looks past Shoko’s sad, tiny figure, peeking over his shoulder as Suguru gives him a small nod. 

He feels manic, like a lion swooping in to collect his mate. It’s a feeling in his blood that he’s not sure he can pinpoint, but one that feels like pure, unbridled protectiveness. He just knows you’re somewhere sad and drunk, wishing he were close even though you’d push him away. Without care, he’s shoving past Shoko – she spins on her heel and follows. Suguru slinks behind with his hands in his pockets. 

“Lay off Shoko!” 

“You’re going to make it worse when you go in there!” 

“She needs me!” 

“Guys, come on.” Suguru’s voice evens theirs out as the music thins. They stop in the hallway of private rooms; Satoru is panting. “Satoru, I don’t think you should go in there. We don’t have to fight about it, and you know-

“I’m the only one that knows what she needs.” Satoru presses his hands into his chest, blue eyes open to the hilt under his dark glasses. His heart is racing so fast he doesn’t know how to think. “It’s complicated, but I know she needs me.” 

You can hear them outside the door – you’re staring at the red wood, vision pulling in and out, distorting the obvious. It makes it easier that you’re drunk, but Satoru’s voice feels like a blanket – a loud, mean blanket. Your heart races just like his, swallowing twice when their voices draw closer. 

Then, silence comes. Someone mutters. 

And the door swings open – wind slaps you in the face. 

It takes a second for reality to settle, but when you see Toru’s body in the doorframe, you’re panicking. 

You scramble for cover, rising to your knees pressed on the faux leather couch. He closes in on you before you can blink, and trying to gather yourself to run, you rise to your feet, towering over him, for once. 

“Get down. We’re leaving.” He takes his glasses off when he looks up at you, big hand reaching to snatch yours up. He feels possessive in your drunken daze – mean in a way you’re not sure you’ve seen so blatantly. 

“What? No.” You whine, knees rocking together as you tug against his grip, nearly losing your footing. 

“Get. Down. Look at you – about to fall.” Toru glances over his shoulder at Shoko and Suguru watching on with their fists in their mouths. He has to approach this accordingly – you two are in public, and everyone thinks you’re estranged. 

Then, he thinks to himself – how estranged can a couple be after only a month and a half apart? 

No, Satoru is crazy about you. He doesn’t care. 

He snatches you down so quickly, careful to hoist you to your feet when you rightfully stumble. 

The last time you two saw each other left him with more questions than answers. Satoru is reaching out for you, gripping onto every shred of hope you hang on a string. He thinks these hookups are hope — a way to split you open so he can see who you are and what you need. 

You don’t talk to him much anymore, but you didn’t tell him no when he proposed starting over. It’s why his mind is skewed - you won’t give him the answers he needs, so he’s making it up in his head. 

Not to mention, this is not where you were supposed to be tonight. “You said you weren’t feeling well, so you were gonna stay home.” He closes his hands over your shoulders, shaking them to bring you to life. Satoru is mad, but he’s not angry. You were too drunk to care — trying to drink him away. 

“Mm,” You whine, shaking hands covering your eyes. You feel exposed with your friends in the doorway, even though the lights are so dim nobody can really see your face. Except him. He’s so close. 

“I hate when you do this!” His voice reaches a peak you haven’t heard in a few days. It’s still not enough to rid your shame. “Stop running from me! There’s nothing to run from!” 

His tone makes Shoko stand up straight, ready to dive in and protect your shivering figure. They’re just lucky the music is so loud — it drowns Satoru out. “Hey, shithead. You don’t have to scream at her.” 

Sensing this situation won’t get better if they’re idling, Suguru steps in, smoothing his hand over the top of her back. “Shoko, let’s just leave them-

“I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep trying.” You whimper, safe with him so close but torn to pieces at what you know you have to do. You have to leave him. This has to be the last time you two ever see each other. 

Digging deep, there has to be something there — some kind of courage that can rear its ferocious head and set you free. 

“Trying? All we do is try; this is a marriage!”

“And I want out. Let… let me out.” 

“You keep coming back! Why?! If you hate me, stop crawling back!” 

Like always, you’re crying, hunching in on yourself as his anger shoots for your core. ”I can’t stop! I can’t. I wish I knew how…” You shake your head, scrubbing at your eyes like it’s scrubbing how pathetic you feel from your frontal lobe. “I-I’m so scared that I’m not who you think I am, Toru. I need to be free — or at least feel free — and I need to be wanted by you. That’s all I want. I want you.” 

“See? You’re telling me you don’t want me, then saying you do.” He calms down when you’re shaking so bad you can’t breathe, turning that possessive arms-length hold into a comforting hug. “How am I supposed to work with that? Help a guy out.” 

“I want you.” You sniffle, finally calm enough under the prison of your hands to get some real words out. “I don’t feel good without you.”

“I want you, too — easy as that.” Satoru takes that spark you give him and lights a torch. He pulls you away when he feels your hands lower, heart-shattering when he sees your bloodshot gaze. “We’re back together now, got it.” 

“No, Satoru—

“What about me is driving you so far away?! Help me understand, I’ll change!” 

“How can I ask you to change everything about yourself?” 

You can hear it through the fog — Satoru’s heart plummets. He pulls away. “What do you mean?” 

It has to be the drunkenness— there’s no way you just said that out loud. You don’t even believe it. Yes, he has flaws like every other human, but he tries. 

Which is more than you can say. 

Somewhere in the middle of the conversation, the door slipped shut because someone knocked on it as soon as the silence hit. The noise stills you to the core. “Satoru, come on. I’ll take you home.” 

Satoru takes a step back, staring into your soul as if he wants to snatch it away… his gaze is off, as if it’s missing something. Or, like something inside of him has died. 

“I-I’m sorry… I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that.” 

He laughs — something akin. Just a short, stupid breath of air through his parted lips. Silently, he shakes his head, then turns on the ball of his foot, making a beeline straight for the door. 

“Sat-

“Yeah, Suguru, let’s go.” 

“Sure-

“Satoru, don’t.” Now, you’re doing the chasing, piecing together the only two sober brain cells you have to put one foot in front of the other with purpose. 

Through the door, you’re rushing past Shoko, tears streaming down your face. It’s pathetic — honestly, the laughing stock of your lifetime, but right now, you don’t care. It feels like you need Satoru. Like your heart is ripping from your chest every time he takes a step away from you. 

No. It’s not supposed to be like this. Satoru is not supposed to be leaving you. 

The crowd gets thicker as they approach the front doors — Suguru peeks over his shoulder, expression so damning and overcome as he watches you push past bodies to get to them. Satoru is dragging him along now, holding onto his bicep like he’s on a mission. 

“No! Mph– T-toru!” You sputter, the heel of your hand flying up to tug at your eyes. You can’t see much in the haze – the front door is cracking open. Everything falls by the wayside. “I’ll stay, I’ll try! I promise you, I’ll try again!” 

He stops, grip shaking around Suguru’s elbow before he yanks it back. The three of you stand like statues in the middle of the floor, blocking the exit — bodies pushing. You’re out of breath, swallowing tears and wiping wetness when he turns to look at you. 

In the pursuit, his glasses fell, but somehow you can see the look in his eyes. One that loves you, hates you so well, and that can’t hide the devotion he feels. 

It hurts. You’re running face-first into a lie. 

Satoru blinks at you, breathless, as he closes the distance in less than a second, it feels like. He yanks off his glasses, balancing in his left hand as he cradles your cheeks. Sobbing, you grip his shoulder blades, shaking your head when he pulls your gaze. 

There, in the ripe blue light at Midnight, he kisses you like he used to all those years ago. He holds you, eyelashes shuddering against your skin as he leans into you. 

The kiss is hungry and mean — he’s shoving his tongue between your lips, squeezing your face so you don’t run away. You cry and sniffle against him, whining when he bites down on your bottom lip, drawing blood. 

Satoru’s not done for at least a minute — face so red when he pulls away that you swear he’s due to pass out. In that heaviness afterward, he presses his forehead into yours. Not saying anything, just silence. Pulsing music, unfamiliar stares. 

Nothing blooms into something. You’ve thrown your life to the wolves, innocent and baring your neck to be mauled to a bloody, beautiful end. 

That’s why you’re crying now. Not for him… for you. 

Satoru is on his back in bed, your ring finger in his mouth, sucking the metal clean. 

You’re on top of him, crying like always. Head tossed back, jazz music on your skin, and blossom in the air. You’re riding him like a horse, out of your mind with pleasure as he moans your name. He’s fucking you so good, now, knowing you differently since the breakup. You feel different since then, too. Nastier — headier. 

You know what you want. Satoru knows you know what you want. He’s ready to give it all to you, but right now, all he wants to do is suck your wedding ring. 

“You look so hot like this.” You gulp, tongue flicking from your parted mouth. Your free hand reaches forward to rub over his face, marking the expanse red in your wake. “Look at me.” 

He does, slamming open his eyes and staring at you so blue it feels like you’re drowning. Toru’s pupils are blown to Hell, too — so dilated you could be mistaken for a drug he’s high on. 

“Fuckin– look at you.” He groans, teeth grinding as your hips slam down again. He’s sure your calves hurt with the fervor of your want, but he’s just too much right now. Your body is craving him – he’s treating you so well. 

Satoru reaches forward, kissing your glistening ring as he grips and grabs at the flesh gathered around your hips. Your body is making him drool, and the pure mutual attraction in the air is so thick neither of you can snap out of it. You’re caught in a constant state of praise, adoration, lust, and more praise. 

Everything is perfect, here. You’re not sure you ever want to rise to the surface.

Technically, you and Toru aren’t separated anymore. It’s complicated. 

It’s what you two tell your friends – it’s what you tell yourself. He still refers to you as his wife even though things aren’t perfect all the time. He comes to and from your apartment now, just like you do his, and the space is exactly what you two need. Maybe living with him is too much? Being around him constantly is suffocating? 

The pieces are starting to fall into place. Satoru sees that you still need to feel free even when you’re tied to him with a ring you refuse to take off. If it’s staying so perfectly, ripe with his spit and deep in the throes of pleasure, it’s meant to be on you. 

“Oh, you’re stunning – taking me like this.” 

“Tell me, baby.” 

“Sexy fuc-fuckin’ mouth. God, your pretty little lips–

You’re slowing down, catching your breath as you grind on him like you want it to mean something. Your ringed hand pinches at his chin, egging those words you need to hear along. Toru’s spacing out – he’s close. 

You shiver, that deep, grinding sensation setting you ablaze. It doesn’t dawn on you just how far you were edging yourself until you’re about to snap, but it’s impressive. “Want it in my mouth?” You whisper, dragging one of his heavy hands to your lips. Biting and kissing at the soft webbing between his thumb and pointer, Satoru mumbles something adjacent to yes, then no. You giggle – hardly there, but felt through the vibrations of the pulsing position you’re in. 

“No– yes, oh, suck on it, beautiful… Tell me you love me,” 

“Oh, I love you, Satoru.” 

“Again.” 

“I love you!” 

“Come here.” His voice turns into something primal – deep in his chest in a way he can’t replicate outside of the moment. This is taking you there at an alarmingly defenseless rate, closing in like a bounty hunter. 

Satoru yanks his hand from your mouth, pinning you chest-to-chest by the back of your neck. He knows not to be gentle now, taking the small hairs at the nape and nearly pulling them out. Open-mouthed, sharp-toothed, he gnaws at your cheek and ear because it’s just too much to get to your lips right now. 

It gets too much – he has to fuck you. He feels like a track runner, hips rising from the bed so he can carry you both to the finish line. Toru knows you too well, he knows how to sync your orgasms, and he executes it perfectly this time. 

Fingertips digging in that gorgeous muscle around your hips, Satoru fucks you right – the only way he knows how to keep you, now. He tugs at your earlobe with sharp teeth, gasping right into you. You’re sobbing for him, fists pulling at the ruined sheets as the wetness between your bodies gets too much to block out. 

“Ugh – take it.” He growls, screwing his pulsing release deeper inside of you as it comes. You can feel every spurt – your nerves are on fire. It’s that third one that does you in. It pools right against your favorite spot, stabbing deep inside of you as Satoru lays his mark. 

You’re the one that collapses on him once the aftershocks ride away, but he’s still limply thrusting into you like he doesn’t have a mind to stop. 

After the ecstasy, Satoru thinks he feels… sad. He’s sad that its over. He’s sad you’re so tired you can’t talk to him anymore. He just wants to talk to you. He wants to know how he did… was it good enough for you now?

Everything settles. You roll away sometime in the midst, and Satoru sits up. He knows you’re tired – don’t want to be touched, don’t want to be bothered, but he wants you to know how much that just meant to him. 

He wants to show you how loved he feels. Something he hasn’t felt in that last year of your marriage. 

“Ba-

His phone rings. Satoru closes his eyes and wills it to Hell.

Then snatches it up from the nightstand, eyes glancing at the caller ID as he stands and fishes his underwear from the pile on the floor. 

It’s Nanami. Satoru smiles when he answers. 

“Hi! How’s Malaysia?” 

‘I’ll make this quick – I’m having a peaceful time down here.’ 

“Really?! Aw, well we miss-

‘I was offered a position down here at the school… Effective next semester, but effective nonetheless.’ 

Satoru stands still as a statue in the doorway of the bedroom. Glancing back at you, it seems like you’re completely dead to the world; you must’ve drifted off. 

So, he slinks out with his promise of good news, trying to hide his smile as he shuts the door so softly the click is almost invisible. 

When he’s safe from ears-length, he opens his mouth. “That’s so amazing! How amazing! So deserved – really, that’s so great.” 

‘Don’t be coy, Professor Gojo.’ 

It’s hard to hide the face-spanning smile that creeps over his. Then, he throws his hands up – letting it take over. In any case, he grinded for over ten years just to feel this moment. Now, he gets to live it. “God – it just rolls off the tongue, doesn’t it?” He flushes like a child, bringing his hand to his face to cover the unbridled joy. 

He has to shake himself free of it again. He earned this. He’s allowed to feel excited. 

After all, you’re not at his feet telling him how annoying his light is. 

‘Fairly well, I admit. Look, Gojo, I didn’t know this was going to happen, but I do not regret it. Your pupils adore you, peers love you, and you’re so smart…’ Nanami pauses, taking a deep breath. Satoru can almost see him now – head in his hands, stewing away in the wake of success. ‘You know I have nothing but respect and faith in you.’ 

“Thank you… honestly, thanks.” 

‘I’ll be back in Japan next week – together, we will work on making this transition as smooth as possible, okay? Don’t let this weigh on you, Gojo. The summer semester is slow. It’ll be the perfect time for you to adapt.’ 

“Yes… yes, sir. I understand. Thank you so much.” 

‘Alright.’ 

Just like that, the line clicks on the most important phone call of his life.

Satoru spent the entirety of his twenties focused on this and you – it’s all he knows, so stepping into this shiny new territory is terrifying and so exciting. 

He just can’t stop. Satoru can’t stop smiling. 

Lost in himself in this moment, the only thing that can pull him out is you. The movement from the bedroom behind him makes that smile even wider. Toru just can’t stop winning today – you’re awake after sex. 

Still, he gives you a moment, giddy in his own skin as he paces, combing his hands through his hair, trying to slow down his racing heart. He doesn’t know whether he should grieve for the years past or look forward to the new ones – maybe both? Maybe talking to you can help him balance out these big, conflicting feelings. 

For once, Satoru actually wants to call his mother. 

He abstains, opting to slip back into the bedroom with a small grin on his lips. You’re not in bed – the sheets are ruffled. Satoru smiles even bigger. 

“Hi, sleepyhead.” He peeks his head in the dark bathroom, reaching to pull the dimmed lights a little higher. He watches as newness floats over your body as you lower yourself into steaming bathwater. 

You’re exhausted – bones sore. You needed this. 

Satoru walks into the bathroom, turning the dripping shower head you used to rinse entirely off. Silence spills the nude space. He’s biting over his lip as he watches you settle. 

“Hi.” You reply, finally. Eyes drifting shut as heat melts over your entire strung-out nervous system. Against the heat, you’re shivering,  opening your eyes as you lean against the back. Staring at his smile, you can’t help but smile back. “What?” 

Toru’s phone is still in his left hand. He waves it once, then pushes it on the counter. “Nanami’s all kicked up in Malaysia. Totally forgot about us over here.” 

You laugh under your breath, flashing him the sleepy bedroom eyes that make him feral. He steps closer. “Mm… Miss him. Nanami always has the best family-owned bakery recommendations.” 

“My professor is not a review site – but I agree.” 

“Shut up,” You shrug him off with a short laugh, rolling your head the other way as he approaches the side of the tub. The moment falls in silence – Toru is kneeling beside the basin, reaching for your wet hands against the polished stone. 

“I know it’s still too soon to tell how you’re feeling, huh?” He chews on his words carefully, avoiding eye contact when you look over to evaluate the sudden dip in his tone. 

Satoru’s referring to a conversation you two almost had two days ago over dinner. He brought up moving you back in — you declined immediately. He suggested going on casual dates until the pieces are connected again, but you also declined. 

He asked you what you wanted from him, and you lied. You want his company, but you want his lust even more. You want him to scream your name in his sleep — to torment him with debilitating morning wood and linger in the air long after it’s gone. You want to smile in his face and have him smile back — you want that feeling of teeth against softness when he smiles as he kisses you. 

That’s it. 

“What do you want to hear?” 

“That you’ll forget you ever left and let me buy you that house I always promised.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Nanami took a job in Malaysia. They’re offering me his position.” 

You sit up, water splashing around you as you stare at him dead-on. Satoru is easy to read — when he’s lying, his eyes sparkle in mischief. He’s telling the truth, you can tell. 

Then, it dawns on you. “Oh, my God.” 

He’s smiling as big as he did when he found out, just ecstatic you’re around to tell it to. “I know.”

“Oh- oh, my God. Baby, I’m so happy.” You whisper, shell-shocked as you pull him into a wet hug. “I’m so proud of you.” Your naked chests melt together with water to make them stick. His heart is sprinting like a hare, knocking over your chest cavity for entrance. 

It’s true – you’re so proud of him. Before Toru was your husband, he was a friend. Previously, he was a trusted and beloved colleague. That’s where it should have stayed. 

“I love you. I do it for you.” He kisses your hair, big hands rubbing your back. This moment with you is so tender and warm, like he can pull away and feel the same heat from you. He knows the truth, though – just doesn’t want to admit it. “I feel so good right now, with you and this news. I think it’s hope.” 

Still hugging him close, arms slung over his neck, your hands pull into fists where he can’t see. You’re staring at yourself in the tall vanity mirror. You know what this is – what he’s going to take from this. Now that he’s found success, naturally, he’ll want to drag you into it. After all, you two spent your best years talking about this time in your lives. He’d get this promotion, and everything will be okay. 

So, you don’t comment on it. Instead, you state the obvious. “I love you.” 

~

 Suguru’s house is up in lights, and chatter spills out through the open kitchen window. Everyone sounds so happy – Satoru’s name is on the tip of everyone's tongue… Everyone is so happy. 

Not you. Never you. You swear something inside of you was manufactured with broken parts – this didn’t make sense. You’ve spent the best week of your life with Satoru. You two had the best conversations, and agreed on the minute stuff. This last week actually felt like the promise – a tiny little inkling of the hope Satoru wanted to churn out so badly. 

Inside, you’re nowhere to be found. 

Once he crawls off of you, you’re drowning in overwhelming numbness. 

When he kisses you, some feeling comes back, only to fade away again with the passing breeze. You look at him and see nothing, you’re tired of hearing about the promotion, and you’re tired of your inability to escape him. 

It passes through you all at once as you stare at the promotion party from around the corner. Suguru lives in a beautiful, well-maintained neighborhood – families and salarymen at the top of their field make this street more alive than you’ve ever felt. You envy it. 

You envy their lives – you bet their marriages are perfect, and their children are beautiful. Their cars are probably polished like Satoru’s, ripe with money like Suguru and demanding attention like Shoko.

You squeeze your eyes shut and fall back behind a fence, willing your life to disappear. You no longer want to have a choice. You don’t want a body that feels something your mind doesn’t – you just don’t want to be here. 

It takes everything inside of you to do it, but one-foot steps in front of the other. Your arms shake as it clutches your purse against your body. Tears come – you welcome them. 

You welcome anything that pours some feeling back into you, because you feel like a dripping, empty chasm. Burning the hope you two created as fuel, your slow steps turn into determined strides, sneaking a look over your shoulder to see if anyone from the gathering was following. 

Maybe you want them to, or maybe you just want to disappear off the face of the Earth. 

You chose the latter. 

France is beautiful around this time of year, but not the city. The countryside sparkles in the humid breeze, away from all the noise and sewage. It feels a little bit like home, only you can’t go back there. Not yet. 

Not when you gave every single piece of your old self away. Of course, you kept the ring and the last name – it feels good to carry him around. It’s proof to your former self, there to remind you that those years did exist, and they were good. 

It’s just you. You’re the faulty component. You’re the missing piece. Satoru is an angel – you’re nothing but a stranger who crashed into his life and drained his happiness from his sweet soul. He doesn’t deserve that. 

The toll you took on him was starting to kill you, but he was too indebted to ever let it show. Satoru would see the darkness in your eyes when he turned your words into a joke, then nod and tell himself to never do that around you again. Being so close to you for so long, his light started to fade at the corners like a vignette. 

He never mentioned it, and when you began to notice, you hated yourself. 

Now, you’re cordial with your mind. It’s had time to think and heal just being alone. Being in France is just a vacation for you – sleeping in a bi-weekly rented cottage a few hours from the Capital. 

You truly picked the destination out of a hat after leaving Tokyo. You quite literally ran for the hills – sending off the stack of divorce documents to his new office at Tokyo-U for him to sign. Inside that sealed package, you had decided to give him the note you had written when you left the first time. You’re not sure why you kept it, but you knew you needed to. 

This was why. You knew you were going to leave again. 

With the absence of him, you’ve begun writing again. It started as notes to him, then to your past self ��� now it’s studies of the mountainside, the way the air smells as it rushes through your hair. Small little poems to take your mind away, and it feels so good. You don’t feel like a walking extension of him anymore, but you feel like a Gojo. There’s that scary sense of power that sits over your shoulders, knowing it’s all one phone call away from falling back into place. 

You have plans to reach out to him eventually, but it feels good to not exist anymore. It feels good to pad around the little cottage in nothing but your socks and underwear, reciting the poem you wrote yesterday without care of anyone hearing. 

It feels good to feel the morning light on your skin, snaking in through the window with the week-old dried wishbone on the sill. You love this life right now, and that’s all you need. 

All you need is right now. 

@coralbae @nylve @torueater @yossellinn @kiwikeeahwah @gojoikawa @peacequeen2 @asimpinamillion @genericxseas @casssiesthings @bypanana @kr3ideprinz @kamuihz @bbqsauceonmytddys @sukunaslilsocks @spacefae-x @tenaciousavenueavenue

[catbolt]

— SYLUS HEADCANONS PT 3.

part 1, part 2 - more headcanons for the loml (fluff)

drinks his morning coffee standing out on the porch like a dad

this man will 100% leave messages for you in the condensation on the mirror after he takes a shower. whether it's a "you look beautiful", a cat drawing, or a smiley face with "have a good day", he makes sure to leave a silly little doodle to put a smile on your face in the morning

always back hugs you and rests his chin on top of your head, which is easy to do because he's so much taller (i headcanon he's 6'4/193cm and istg i am right about that)

i think sylus is an EXPERT flower purchaser. the bouquets he pulls together are genuinely works of art. no supermarket flowers from this guy considering he has a florist on retainer to provide regular fresh flowers for his house and for your weekly bouquets that always incorporate your favorite flower.

he's so self-assured. he literally has no doubt about exactly how and when he can get something done and he's right every single time. it's not cockiness or arrogance exactly, except when he's joking around, just a calm and deep-seated confidence that exudes in everything he does. he also just knows himself really, really well, and if he can't do something he admits so easily, never over-exaggerating his capabilities. "i don't know how, but i'll learn" is his attitude— especially when you're the one asking.

sylus has a modest little wood cabin in the forest outside the city for private vacations whenever he needs a break from being the leader of onychinus. he brings mephisto so he can play with the wild crows and birds for enrichment. it's his most private space, so it took a long time for him to bring you there, but now you spend weekends there together regularly.

despite having a refined palate and infinite opportunities to experience fine dining, sylus 100% has a junk food guilty pleasure and will absolutely never say no to a late night drive thru run

always says he's not interested in reality tv but consistently ends up standing behind the couch when you're watching *insert trashy reality show* intensely invested. acts like he doesn't care but then later that night he's lying in bed ranting to you like "i can't believe brad is going to the altar with veronica after he led britney on for the past four episodes"

he honestly just loves staring at you. not in a creepy way, but he does love to watch whatever you do, whether it be working, getting ready for a night out, sleeping, even just sitting around scrolling on your phone. he isn't a chatty guy and truly enjoys the moments where he gets to silently admire you in your natural state.

he always ensures you feel genuinely comfortable with whatever you two are doing. he's good at reading you and is exceptionally aware of when you're placating or people-pleasing: "tell me what you really want," "i can tell when you're lying, sweetheart," "i need you to be honest with me, baby. it doesn't make me happy when you try to tell me what you think i want to hear." whether you like it or not, he always knows when you're lying and pushes you to speak your mind.

[chaussetteblanche]

and they were roommates pt. 4

pairing : Spencer Reid x fem!student!roommate!reader summary : 2.3k word count : your experience with the unsub warning : canon-typical violence (it gets a bit gory, torture-ish, implied sexual violence), swear words > read at your own risk, you are responsible for the media you consume A/N : thank you all for the support and love on this omggg <333 Emily's a tiny bit of a bitch in this one, whoopsie. y/n cries the whole time, I figured that was what I would do. would you guys like a part 5, maybe Spencer taking care of y/n after such a traumatic experience? some comfort after hurt?

part 1, part 2, part 3

The first thing you noticed when you came to your senses was the throbbing in the back of your head. Your first reflex was to bring your hand up to where you were sure to find blood, but you couldn’t move either of your arms. Opening your eyes wearily, you noticed that your wrists were restrained, binding you to an old wooden chair.  “What the-“ Your heart rate picked up as the memory of being hit over the head came back to you. Frantically looking around, your breathing started getting short and ragged when you realised your surrounding were wholly unfamiliar to you. You jerked your wrists to the sides, hoping that maybe the tight ropes would untie themselves. 

“Don’t tire yourself out,” an icy voice drawled from a dark corner. You could barely hear over the sound of the blood rushing in your ears. You cursed yourself when he stepped out of the shadows, greasy locks pushed behind his ears. You should have told Spencer. You should have known.

His face was barely visible in the dim light. The smell of dust and mold which clung to the room suited him well. His gaze on you made you feel dirty and you hated it. You examined the enclosed space you were in and realised you were in an abandoned art room on campus. You'd discovered it once with your friends by accident, years ago. Art supplies, canvases and desks were strewn about in a careless manner. You tried not to think too much about the blood dotting the floor in multiple places.

"Why did you bring me here?" you asked, doing your best to remain calm. He was clearly unstable and you didn't want to trigger him if you could help it. “Don't worry about that, just know you’re not getting out of here any time soon, honey.” He smiled, a frightening grimace, and licked his lips. Nausea clouded your senses for a second. Tears gathered on your waterline. “Oh yes, I will.” Your voice shook as you spoke and you hated how weak you sounded. His brows raised and he let slip a little, mocking laugh. It made your skin crawl. A tear slipped down your cheek and, humiliatingly, you couldn't wipe it away. “And why do you think that?” he asked, feigning interest. You scowled at him. “The FBI is going to find you, you sick fuck. If they couldn't before this, they definitely will now." 

Your head whipped to the side as he slapped you across the face. He bent down, placing his face mere centimetres from yours. Another tear fell from your eye as you felt your cheek sting and then get uncomfortably warm. “You stupid bitch,” he snarled. “You better watch your tone. You actually think they’ll find you? That's cute." You swallowed, opting to stay silent.

Spencer knew something had happened as soon as Hotch stepped into the room. Over the years, he'd learned how his boss functioned and how to separate all the micro-expressions he used before assembling them back together and interpreting them. Today, he could tell something was seriously wrong.

He hadn't even thought of you at first. In his mind, you were safe. The unsub had been arrested and proof was being searched for. The guy fit the profile and the profile never lied. So why did Hotch ask him to sit down?

"W- what?" "I think you may want to sit down for this." Spencer was getting agitated, he didn't like being kept out of the information loop. "Hotch, just tell us what's going on," pressed Morgan, brows drawn together. "You know how we asked all the professors to contact us immediately if anyone fitting the victimology didn't show up for class?" "Yeah," Emily nodded, urging Hotch on. "We got a call." The Unit Chief's eyes fell on Spencer and the latter knew what he was going to say before the words were uttered. "Spencer, Y/N's professor said she didn't show up to class this morning."

"O-okay, wait, that doesn't mean anything, we arrested a guy, she could just not be feeling well," Emily spoke hastily, concerned about the look on Spencer's face. "No, we must have the wrong-" Spencer was interrupted by Morgan: "Wait a second, the profile says-" "I don't care what the profile says, Morgan! Y/N's first class today is Germanic Ethos and Christian Faith in Medieval Literature, that's her favourite class, she's never missed it in the entire semester! And she was feeling well this morning, we had breakfast together and she would have told me if not! Clearly, we have the wrong guy!"

Silence reigned for a short moment after Spence's outburst. The entire team was left speechless by his behaviour, which was entirely unprecedented. Spencer ran a hand through his hair, letting out a small sigh. "I- Can you try calling her at least? Before we jump to any conclusions." Emily crossed her arms over her chest. Spencer sent her a dark look before whipping out his phone and pressing on the first name in his contact list. He put it on speaker and let it ring.

"No, no, please," you sobbed, "no more! Please! No, stop!"

Your voice was raw from screaming. Judging by the three shallow cuts he left on your right shoulder, the unsub enjoyed seeing your blood pearl and run down your skin. He also revelled in watching you writhe and scream in pain. "What did I tell you? Shut the fu-" He raised his hand in the air and you flinched away by reflex only to find the blow never came. You held your breath.

"I'm breaking dishes up in here all night, uh uh! I ain't gon' stop until I see police and lights, uh uh! I'm a fight a man tonight, I'm a fight a man-"

Oh, the irony. You didn't know whether to bless or curse Rihanna. "What the fuck is this?!" he roared, swivelling sharply on his feet to press the blade of his bloody knife into your cheek. You whimpered quietly. You couldn't help but think of all the infections you would be vulnerable to because of his dirty and rusted weapon. How could someone have so little care for basic hygiene? "It's- It's my ringtone! It's just my ringtone!"

"A man, a man, a ma-a-a-an! A man, a man, a ma-a-a-an!"

"You little bitch," he hissed, quickly untying your hands and grabbing your throat. He lifted you up by the neck and slammed you into the nearest wall, yelling about what a deceiving, conniving whore you were. You cried out in pain, desperately pulling at his hand which was wound tight around your throat. "You think your little friends are going to come and get you?!" he mocked, smushing your cheeks with his other hand. "Tough luck, doll, you're all alone and you're going to-" "Wait!" you spluttered, "Wait!" Your vision had begun going blurry but your mind remained intact. "If- If I don't answer, they'll know something's wrong! And then they'll send everyone out looking for me, for you!"

His grip on your throat lessened and you coughed, forcing air back into your lungs. Your eyes burned with tears. "What does it matter to you?" "Look- I- It doesn't matter, my ringtone is about to stop! And they'll come for sure!" Making a split-second decision, he stomped over to where he'd thrown your bag and sweater carelessly on the ground. You slid down onto the floor, wiping at your eyes. Hastily ruffling through your bag, he pulled your phone out after a second. You lamented all the flyaway papers you'd annotated with bright and lively colours now most likely stained with grime and blood. The unsub answered the call and roughly pressed the phone against your ear. You winced.

"O-Oh, Y/N! It's Spencer, are you alright?!" Big, fat tears rolled down your cheeks at the comforting sound of Spencer's voice. You wanted nothing more than to be near him, away from this living hell. If anyone could understand a message and find you, Spencer could. You were painfully aware of the little time you had left before the unsub got on with his routine and got rid of you. You cleared your throat, wanting to appear natural. "Hey! Yeah, I'm- I'm fine, I'm heading for my Wax Tablet Workshop, we are going to look at how writing on wax is art which has been abandoned by scholars, like universities." "O- Okay, sweets, I'll come get you after class okay? We can go for a coffee together!" "Sounds great, Spence!"

The unsub threw your phone onto the ground next to you and crushed it with his foot. You let your tears fall freely. Spencer had understood. He was coming.

"That was a hidden message, she doesn't have a Wax Tablet Workshop. It's not even a course the university offers." Spencer's brain was working even faster than usual. The BAU team had never seen him like this before. "Garcia, look for all abandoned locations on university campus. Maybe a classroom?" he urged.

The sound of a keyboard typing incredibly fast was heard on the speaker. "I've got one." Penelope's voice was urgent and contained no trace of its usual lightness. "There's an abandoned art studio on the East side of the campus. I'm sending you the address now."

"Let's go," ordered Hotch.

You'd never wear shorts again. Exhausted, beaten, bruised and tied to a chair, you didn't have the energy to do anything more than move your knee when he trailed his finger along it. You were starting to lose hope. There was no clock in sight, but you could guess your time would soon be up. Some part of you wanted to give up. You knew if Spencer were here, he'd tell you to keep fighting, to keep hoping. But you were tired, so, so tired.

You suspected you had a concussion from when he'd knocked out and when he'd slammed you into the wall. Your vision was blurry. Although, maybe that was due to the tears. They hadn't stopped coming since he'd first slapped you. But when his cold hand found your thigh and squeezed it roughly, the kindling fire in you regained strength. No. You would rather die than suffer whatever else he had planned for you. As he started moving his repulsive mouth towards you, you jerked your knee upwards, hard, right into his groin. He roared in pain and doubled over, stumbling backwards.

"Stay the fuck back!" you screamed hysterically. "Don't you dare fucking touch me, you psycho!" He met your eyes with a frenzied look you'd never seen before and pounced on you. The chair you were sitting on shattered with a loud noise and you screamed, finding yourself lying on top of splintery wood pieces. As he brought his arm upwards, knife facing downwards, towards you, you closed your eyes. You didn't want him to be the last thing you saw. You thought of all the good things in your life, your family, Spencer, Geoffrey, Spencer, your friends, Spencer,...

"Put it down!!!" bellowed a familiar voice. "Put it down now!" You opened your eyes. The door behind you had been broken down. FBI agents flooded the room, all aiming their guns at the man on top of you. His eyes darted frantically between Agent Morgan, whose voice you'd recognised, and two other agents you couldn't see.

"I want a deal!" the unsub cried out, "I want a deal!" "No deal," a deeper, more authoritative voice spoke. The unsub raised his arm again, preparing to strike. You closed your eyes.

BAM!

To this day, you didn't think the unsub expected to be shot. You figured he was expecting to be imprisoned. You didn't see the look on his face when he was shot, only felt the dead weight of his body falling on top of you.

Shrieking hysterically, you struggled frantically to move his corpse off you. Someone shoved him off you, promising you in a soothing voice that you were safe.

"Spencer." His name had never been spoke like that before. It was a haunting sob, a cry for help. He was at your side immediately, ridding you of the ropes around your wrists and pulling you away from the broken chair.

It was only when he called your name a third time that you finally found your grasp on reality again. Spencer pulled you into his arms, being careful not to squeeze you too tight. You wrapped your arms around him, burying your face in his shoulder. The comforting smell of him, of home, engulfed and grounded you. "It's okay," he cooed softly, lips brushing your ear, "you're safe now, he can't hurt you anymore." "Call an ambulance," you heard someone order in the distance. Sobbing hard into Spencer's shoulder, you pulled him impossibly closer to you. "I'm so sorry," you bawled, "I had seen him before on c- campus, like- like your boss said but I didn't want to tell you! I thought he was an- an exchange student!" Spencer shushed you, hands still shaking from taking the shot he took with no hesitation. This would be one of the kills he wouldn’t loose any sleep over. "You have nothing to be sorry for, sweetheart, you did everything right, I promise you."

"I- I didn't do what you always say," you hiccuped sadly, mouth moving against the material of his sweater vest, staining it with blood and tears. It was an article of clothing which would be ruined for both of you. Spencer would give it to charity a week later, you wouldn't miss it. "I didn't play into his fantasy, I kept telling him you were going to find me, and he was so angry!" "Baby." This was the first he'd called you that. It stopped you in your tracks. "Listen to me, you did everything right. You may not still be alive if you'd played into his fantasy. You were perfect, I promise. Just breathe, now, alright? You’re okay." "Are- are you sure?" "Yes, baby, I'm sure."

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